tures, Oh, Papa, if I had only been strong enough, if only I could have filled Mama's place-, She heard the voices of the San in the steam, crying out in greeting to their own ghosts and memories. O'wa hunted again with his sons, and H'ani saw her babies and her grandchildren and crooned her love and mourning.
Oh, Michel, his eyes were a Marvellous blue, I will love you for ever. Yes, oh yes, I will name your son for you. I promise you that, my love, he will carry your name. How long she remained in the pool she did not know, but gradually the fantasies and the phantoms faded, and then she felt H'ani's hands leading her to the rocky lip.
The scalding waters seemed to have drained all the strength from her. Her body glowed a bright brick colour, and the ingrained dirt of the desert was scoured from the pores of her skin. Her knees were weak and rubbery.
H'ani draped the gemsbok skin over her wet body and helped her up the rocky passage to the surface. Night had fallen already, and the moon shone bright enough to cast shadows at their feet. H'ani led her to the rude shelter and wrapped her in the gemsbok skin.
The Spirits have forgiven, she whispered. They are pleased that we have made the journey. They sent my babies to greet me and tell me so. You can sleep well, Nam Child, there is no more offence. We are welcome in this place.
Centaine woke in confusion, not sure what was happening to her, not even certain where she was, imagining for the first few seconds that she was back in her chamber at Mort Homme and that Anna was standing beside her bed. Then she became aware of the coarse grass and hard earth beneath her and the smell of the rawhide that covered her, and immediately following that the pain came again. It was as though a claw had closed on her lower body, a cruel taloned claw, cramping and crushing her, and she cried out involuntarily and doubled over, clutching her stomach.
With the pain, reality rushed back upon her. Her mind was clear and sharp after the hallucinations of the previous day. She knew what was happening, she knew instinctively that the immersion in the heated waters of the pool and the drugged smoke she had breathed must have precipitated it.
H'ani! she called, and the old woman materialized out of the grey half light. It has begun! H'ani helped her to her feet, then gathered up the gemsbok skin.
Come, she whispered. We must go where we can be alone. H'ani must have already chosen the place, for she led Centaine directly to a hollow a short way beyond the camp, but screened from it by the mongongo grove. She spread the gemsbok skin at the base of a large mongongo tree and settled Centaine upon it. She knelt over her and removed her ragged canvas skirt, then with quick, strong fingers, she made a brief but thorough examination and then rocked back on her heels.
Soon, Nam Child, very soon now, she smiled happily, but Centaine's reply choked off as another spasm caught her. Ah, the child is impatient! H'ani nodded.
The spasm passed and Centaine lay and panted, but she had barely caught her breath before she stiffened again.
Oh, H'ani, hold my hand, please! PleaseV
Something burst deep within Centaine's body and hot liquid poured from her, and sprayed down her legs.
Close, very close now, H'ani assured her, and Centame gave a little hunted cry.
Now- H'ani pulled her into a sitting position, but she slumped back.
It's coming, Hlani. Get up! H'ani snapped at her. You must help it now.
Get up. You cannot help the baby if you lie on your back! She forced Centaine into a squatting position, with her feet and knees splayed apart, the natural position for voiding.
Hold the tree to steady yourself, she instructed her urgently. There! She guided Centaine's hands on to the rough bark and Centaine moaned and pressed her forehead hard against the trunk.
Now! H'ani knelt behind her, and encircled Centaine's body with her thin wiry arms.
Oh, H'ani, Centaine's cry rose sharply.
Yes! I will help you push him out. And she tightened her grip as Centaine bore down instinctively. Push, Nam Child, hard! Hard! Push! H'ani entreated her as she felt the girl's stomach muscles bunch up and harden into bands of iron.
There was a great blockade within her and Centaine clung to the tree and strained and moaned, and then she felt the obstruction move a little, then jam hard again.
H'ani! she cried, and the thin arms locked around her and the old woman moaned with her as they strained together. H'ani's naked body was pressed to Centaine's arched back, and she felt strength flowing out of the old wizened flesh like an electrical current.
Again, Nam Child, H'ani grunted in her ear. He is close, so close. Now! Nam child, push hard. Centaine bore down with all her strength and will. Her jaws were clenched so that she thought her teeth would crack, and her eyes swelled in their sockets. Then she felt something tear, a stinging burning pain, but despite the pain she found strength for another rigorous convulsion. it moved again, then there was a rush, a release and something enormous and impossibly heavy slid out of her at the same moment H'ani's hand reached under I her buttocks to guide and welcome and protect.
Like a benediction, the pain wilted away, and left her I shaking as though in high fever and running with her I own sweat, but empty, blessedly empty, as though her viscera had been drawn out of her.
H'ani released her grip, and Centaine clutched at the treetrunk for support, and drew long ragged breaths.
Then she felt something hot and wet and slippery squirming between her feet, and she pushed herself wearily away from the treetrunk and looked down. A tangle of fleshy glistening tubes still dangled out of her, and joined to them, enmeshed in their coils, the infant lay in a pool of blood-speckled fluid on the gemsbok-skin mat.
it was small, she was surprised at how small, but its clutching and kicking limbs were stretching in spasmodic gestures. The face was turned away from her but the M;, small neat head was covered with a dense cap of sodden black curls, plastered to the skull.
H'ani's hands reached down between her legs from behind and lifted the baby out of her sight. Instantly Centaine felt a devastating sense of deprivation, but she was too weak to protest. She felt a gentle twitching and tugging on the umbilical cord as H'ani handled the child, and then suddenly there was a furious squalling howl. It struck Centaine to the heart.
Then H'ani's laughter joined in chorus with the angry bawls. Centaine had never heard a sound of such unequivocal joy.
Oh, listen to him, Nam Child. He roars like a lion cub! Centaine waddled around awkwardly, hampered by the fleshy ropes dangling from her own body and still linking her to the infant. He was struggling in H'ani's hands, all wet and defiant, his face red with anger and his bee-stung eyes tight closed, but his toothless pink mouth wide as he howled his outrage.
A boy, H'ani? Centaine panted wildly.
Oh yes, H'ani laughed, by all means, a boy, and with the tip of her forefinger she tickled his tiny penis. it stuck out stiffly as though to endorse his anger, and at H'ani's touch released a powerful arcing jet of urine.
Look! Look! H'ani choked with laughter. He pisses on the world. Bear witness, all the Spirits of this place, a veritable lion cub has been birthed this day. She offered the squirming red-faced infant to Centaine.
Clean his eyes and nose, she ordered, and, like a mother cat, Centaine did not need further instruction.
She licked the mucus from the tiny swollen eyelids, from his nostrils and mouth.
Then H'ani took the child, handling him with familiar expertise, and she tied off the umbilical cord with the soft white inner bark threads of the mongongo tree, before severing it with a quick slash of her bone knife. Then she rolled the end of the tube in the medicinal leaves of the wild quince and bound it in place with a rawhide strip around his middle.