There, Cryl and Lena were happily lounging in the soft chairs, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, talking over each other as they exchanged their last farming experiences. They'd very nearly done level 30 in just a few days which admittedly couldn't have been too hard for people who'd invested real money in the game. Lena screamed with delight when she saw me. As she fell around my neck, I felt something warm inside as if hugging my little sister after a long separation. Cryl didn't seem to be jealous. His eyes betrayed his pleasure at seeing me. This was my family, the Children of the Night.
Once we've had our hugs, I sat them down and gave them a summary of the last few days' events. The news of our own castle, with its First Priest as their leader and Macaria as their patroness brought my authority to a height previously unknown. That's why they enthusiastically accepted my request of joining the ranks of religious workers. Even the Help of the Fallen One didn't automatically make Cryl a priest but rather defined his religious preferences and offered him some unknown freebies.
The kids jumped up and pulled some serious faces, preparing for the ceremony.
"Not so fast," I stopped them. "We need to get everything ready first."
As they stared at me, uncomprehending, I scooped a couple handfuls of vials out of my bag, lining them up in strategic rows that ensured prompt grabbing, filling and closing.
"Now listen," I said. "I'm pretty sure the goddess will come to have a look at her new disciples. Her arrival will be accompanied by the natural phenomenon of the Sparks of Divine Presence, which will be the first pillar of our upcoming financial well-being. Once the celestial window is closed, grab the vials and scoop the Sparks into them."
I looked around the room choosing a relatively empty corner. Pulling the rag aside, I pointed, "Come and stand here."
Casting one final glance at their deadpan faces, I stuck my tongue out and gave them a wink. It wouldn't do greeting the goddess looking like a funeral procession. Young people are naturally giggle-happy and they don't need much prompting. When, to the jingling of the bells and the glittering of the snowflakes, Macaria's face peeked out of the celestial window, all she saw was two happy geezers grinning from ear to ear. Herself blushed with (I suppose) the Fallen One's energetic advances, she nodded and gave me the thumbs-up.
The portal window glazed over, shrouding her face. With a pop, the air thickened, revealing the bastard Winnie standing right in the middle of the precious sheet of celestial snow. Cringing, he wiped his filthy paws and sloshed across the puddle toward the fireplace, kicking and stomping out the precious Sparks.
"You pig!" I selected him as target and slammed a mental fist on the priest skills panel.
I really don't know what I meant by doing this. It all happened too quickly. Either I meant to cast a curse over him or report him to the gods for getting in the way. Instead, Winnie got ordained.
The bells jingled again, anxiously this time, and the goddess' annoyed face—her lips slightly bee-stung—didn't promise a joyful rite. Seeing the would-be priest, she raised her eyebrows, her eyes fixed on me in surprise. I shook my head, shielding myself with my hands, gesturing I had nothing to do with him. The white bastard finally awoke from his momentary confusion and was now trying to make himself scarce. As if! Panicking, the creature launched a string of unsuccessful teleport attempts rattling like a machine gun while Macaria, having blocked his teleport skill, turned round and said something to somebody behind her back.
Could it be I'd been too cruel to the white monster, I thought seeing the Fallen One's scowl. As his glare fell onto Winnie, his face cleared; tilting his head to one side, the Fallen One chuckled in surprise.
"That's funny," I heard him mutter. "I could use that..."
Reaching out of the window, the Fallen One grabbed Winnie, pulling the creature toward the portal window. Have you ever heard a wounded hare scream? Probably not, otherwise the ranks of animal protectors would have soared into millions. That was the kind of scream Winnie had emitted. Meeting Lena's begging stare, I nodded and activated my Appeal to Gods ability.
"Listen, AI 311, make sure you treat him well, okay? He's not bad at all..."
The Fallen One glared at me, his voice pounding in my immediately-sore head. "Don't you talk back to me. It's my business what I do to him. And one other thing. I'd appreciate it if you gave your dedication shit a rest for tonight. Otherwise I'll be forced to make sure you don't enjoy your own matrimonial state for the next hundred years or so."
The window slammed shut. My two friends grabbed the vials, hurrying to pack away the glittering carpet of snow.
I just stood there scratching my head and thinking of an appropriate answer.
* * *
An economic evaluation of the Happy Dreams private virtual prison model.
The first private for-profit correctional facilities were officially introduced in the USA in February 1983.
The Act of Congress 6133 approved April 203X makes provision for the digitization of long-term inmates.
Social advantages:
Complete elimination of violence, drug trafficking and escape attempts in digital mode following the procedure recommended by the Department of Corrections .
Psychological testing shows that digitizing increases the first-time offenders' chances of successful reintegration into society 19%. This figure is 5% for repeat offenders.
Financial advantages:
A six-fold increase in prison population density;
Guard staff decrease 75%;
Payback period of 11 months;
Expected profit: $9000 per convict per year, depending on the virtual world, the more popular and populated ones being the most desirable in regard to their farming and crafting potential.
Chapter Sixteen
I congratulated the two on their priestly status. Then I lectured Cryl on the importance of the Voluntary Death skill and meted out their responsibilities for the next few hours. I gave them access to the auto buy, entrusting them with the pen-pushing task of sifting through the messages and answering them using a few templates I'd jotted down. All the really important stuff they had to forward to my PM box. I scheduled the dedication ritual for one p.m. the next day. With one final umpteenth yawn, I motioned them out of the room.
They couldn't have been more understanding. Chirruping like sparrows, they made themselves scarce. Funny how the dissociation of visual and behavioral patterns can affect brain functions. On the outside, Lena was the epitome of an Elfa, sophisticated and sensuaclass="underline" the AI-perfected idea of male doom. But that was visually. My brain was boiling over her childish hopscotch gait, her open-mouth curiosity and bright-eyed enthusiasm. So while my mind was screaming, she's only a child! it was unable to stop the drool from running down my virtual chin. I just hoped that Cryl understood it, too, and was able to postpone any heavy-duty courtship for another couple years.
It looked like the day, however crazy it had been, was finally over. I had to admit I'd already started to regret getting caught in the stream of events that had taken me to the top of AlterWorld's political life. How much nicer would it have been to sit by the Gnoll Hill smoking the gentle monsters. It had to be the proverbial fear of responsibility speaking for me, the unwillingness to step out of my comfort zone.