“I just think it’s so awful,” he mumbled. “I can’t bear the thought of it, opening up his little body and emptying out the contents.”
“You won’t be able to tell afterward, I promise you that,” Sejer said. “Rest assured that you will be able to see him for a last time without being upset. Talk to the funeral directors about it. They can help you with things like that.”
Nicolai sat in silence for a long time, lifting his gaze to look out of the window, while Sejer thought about Carmen. What would her motive have been, if she had in fact thrown Tommy in the pond on purpose? That she couldn’t take any more? That he wasn’t a wanted child, as she claimed he was? That he tied her down? That having a child who was different felt like a burden — an overwhelming, lifelong, all-encompassing, and exhausting obligation that was simply too much? And so today, of all days, on Wednesday, August 10, she had done what she could to get rid of him once and for all? Simply because he was different. Could that really be true? Or was it none of the above. Just a tragic accident of the kind they saw too many of, where no one was to blame?
It was six o’clock in the evening when he let them go. Skarre drove them back to the house. He stood outside and looked around. It was a long way to the nearest neighbors; there were no houses in the immediate vicinity. Something criminal could easily have happened down at the pond that day without another living soul seeing anything.
6
Frank did not try to say hello — Holthemann was not interested — and the dog slunk off obediently to lie in the corner. There was no affection to be had from the chief superintendent, the dog knew this. Holthemann looked up at Sejer, his pale eyes peering from behind his thick and not particularly clean spectacles. His stick, which was leaning against the wall in a corner, had a silver head on which an old coat of arms was engraved. Holthemann had a gimpy leg, a very gimpy leg. His circulation was appalling; the veins clogged right up to his groin. The leg might have to be amputated just above the knee. The very thought sickened his stomach and had resulted in many a sleepless night. He often woke up after only a couple of hours, dripping in sweat, with the image of a bleeding, sawed-off stump. He didn’t want a false leg, no matter what. He had no time for spare parts; he was a proud man. But his leg was discolored from the ankle up and when he pressed his fleshy calf with a finger, it left a dent that stayed there for a long time. It terrified him.
The fact that he moved so slowly fooled many into believing that he was intellectually dull and deliberate, whereas he was actually sharp as a knife, despite his age, disability, and thick glasses.
“So, are you going to arrest them?” he asked with a hint of a smile. “Are there any contradictions?”
“The lovely Miss Carmen Zita is rather confused with regard to the sequence of events,” Sejer told him. “She was hesitant and seemed unsure when I asked her to tell me about what happened today. I know that it’s not much to go on, a minor detail perhaps. And she is in shock. But obviously the confusion could mean something, so I’m keeping an open mind. The father seems to be reliable and his grief is genuine. There’s something artificial about Carmen; I think she’s acting. Though her tears are real enough and the waterworks are constant. Never seen crying like it. And unlike you, I didn’t have any tissues.”
Holthemann leaned back and clasped his hands behind his head.
“It will be hard to present evidence, all the same,” he said. “I mean, if anything suspect has taken place. He could easily have gone down to the water under his own steam. She said he was active and had just learned to walk and was into everything. What does Snorrason say? Have you spoken to him yet?”
“He’s promised to give us the results as soon as possible. But I’m afraid there won’t be any conclusive evidence. What would it be? As far as we can tell, he wasn’t injured in any way. Our first priority has to be establishing whether he was still alive when he fell in the water. I’m trying to think of everything and I may just be seeing ghosts in broad daylight. But ghosts won’t get us very far in court, will they? And I guess we should be happy about that, don’t you agree?”
“You shouldn’t be so proud of our system,” Holthemann admonished. “It’s not infallible. Do we have anything on them from before?”
“No,” Sejer said. “Neither of them has any previous convictions. Your leg” — he changed the subject and nodded at Holthemann’s leg — “is it still alive?”
“Only just,” Holthemann replied gloomily. “I’ve got practically no feeling in it; it’s just numb.”
“Get yourself on a treadmill,” Sejer suggested. “It’ll improve your circulation.”
The chief shook his head. “No,” he said firmly. “What will be, will be. No one is going to get me to run like a rat in a wheel.”
7
Tenth of August. Evening.
Carmen watched him from the window. She stood there for a while, wringing her hands. Nicolai had walked across the yard and onto the jetty. Now he was sitting on the edge and looked terrible. She went down after him, slowly, hesitantly, uncertain what to say. The words she was so frantically trying to catch seemed to grow like toads in her mouth, and suddenly she felt thirsty.
“Nicolai,” she said gently, “he’s never coming back. And we have to deal with it somehow. The future, I mean, and how we cope. Come inside, Nicolai. We have to eat; it’s getting late.” She stood on the jetty and begged and pleaded. But Nicolai was ashen with grief, his thin brown hair bedraggled. She had never seen him like this before, never seen him so helpless and forsaken.
“How can you think about food,” he said, “when Tommy’s gone forever? I just don’t get how you can think about food.”
She sat down beside him and took him by the arm. Her nails against his skin felt like sharp claws.
“If we don’t eat, then we’ll die too. And Tommy wouldn’t have wanted that,” she said seriously.
Nicolai flared up, unable to help himself.
“You know nothing about what Tommy would want,” he said, his voice bitter. “You should have shut the door. You know what he’s like, that he gets everywhere. People say those children are slow, but not our Tommy. He was quick as lightning.”
“Yes, but it was so hot,” she complained. “And you were in the cellar as usual. It’s nice and cool down there, so it’s easy for you to talk. You don’t need to put the blame on me,” she added. “That’s not fair. It’s bad enough as it is, without you making it worse. We’re going to have to talk sometime. We have to sort out the funeral and a whole lot of other things. Pappa Zita will be here soon; he’ll help us get started.”
Nicolai picked at a loose splinter in the dark wood with nails that were bitten to the quick.
“What did they ask you about?” she said after a pause. “They asked me all kinds of things. They even wanted to know if I breastfed him. I don’t see why they have to go into such detail. It just seems nosy to me.”
“You don’t understand anything, do you? You don’t get how serious this is. Tommy’s dead and gone. He drowned, and it’s our fault because we didn’t keep an eye on him. He wanted to know what you were doing when Tommy left the house. What were you doing?”
She thought about it. “I was just puttering around, tidying up, you know. And I wanted to clean the fish for supper. I went into the bathroom to rinse out some washing. Everything happened so fast. And I looked for him in all the rooms before I even thought about the pond. Come on now, we have to go in,” she nagged. “Mom and Dad will be here soon, and they’ll help us with supper.”