Lifting the Vox into the van with LeighAnn, I grunt, “How’s Ultimate? I meant to call him yesterday.”
“Acting like a big baby. His foot’s mostly healed, but he lies around playing video games and begging me to make him sandwiches.”
“You know, after cutting off a finger, you think he’d be more careful.”
“Guy suffers for his art.” Panting, LeighAnn slumps against the middle seat. “Roadie work is a heck of a lot harder in pumps.”
“Yeah.”
“Also, when you can’t cuss.”
I snicker. LeighAnn just popped up one Sunday at church, Holly. I felt a tap on my shoulder, and there she was, grinning behind her huge Jackie O hangover glasses. She sat with Tyler and slipped out as soon as service ended. The week after that, her and Max both came.
Now they come most Sundays, usually straight from wherever they spent Saturday night, singing praise, stinking of beer and stale cigarette smoke. Neither of them has decided to get baptized yet, and Max says he just likes the music. But I keep praying maybe their wandering is coming to an end.
Done loading, we get lunch. Holly, can you smell Mrs. Chandler’s chicken? It’s so good, it makes you jealous of the chicken. Here we all are, wandering around, trying to figure out what God wants for us. But the chicken’s purpose in life is so clear—to be soaked in buttermilk and fried up by Mrs. Chandler.
Tyler is talking with Hannah Marie. He tells her his plans now that he’s graduated, and she inspects the silhouette of an airplane tattooed on his inner forearm. When she spots me, she starts hopping in place. “Jane! Oh wow, you were so good!”
“Thanks.”
“I could never stand up there and do something like that. And you did it and didn’t even look nervous.”
“Well … ”
“All right, I’m going to go eat. But hey.” She jabs Tyler in the arm. “You can’t just disappear now you’ve graduated, okay? You better email me sometime.”
“I will. I promise.”
“Good. Looking forward to it.”
I get some green beans and don’t say anything until Hannah Marie has bounced off. Then, “You know she likes you, right?”
Tyler scoops the meringue off his lemon meringue pie. “She’s always like that.”
“She’s always like that around you.”
He scrunches his forehead at me, glances back at Hannah Marie.
“Go invite her to Friday’s gig.”
He stalls a little while longer, then goes to talk to her. After he’s gone, LeighAnn says, “They do look really cute together.”
“Sure. Plus, you see how chatty she is. If she likes Stratofortress, she’ll tell everybody. That word-of-mouth is what you guys need to start drawing big crowds.”
“It really scares me how under all the Sesame Street stuff, you have the heart of a record exec.”
We sit on the rocks by the shore, balancing our plates in our laps. We eat our chicken and joke around. Kicking my sandals off, I stir my toes through the cool water. I wish for the millionth time that you could have known these guys, Holly. And I wish you could have known me, too, the person I’ve become and all the songs I’m learning to play.
I miss you, Holly, and I’ll love you forever. But death can’t stop life. Even when something sinks down to the drowned forest, something new will always emerge from the shimmering, restless river.