Noticing my calmness, she began to chatter in relief. “Mikon boasted so often of his experiences on the golden ship of Astarte that I was tempted to show him what else a man can experience in a woman’s arms. He believed himself irresistible because Aura lost consciousness at his touch, but that was just her weakness. He could not compete with you in that respect, Turms, although he had his pleasing features.”
“I don’t doubt that!” I shouted, finally losing my temper. “I understand and forgive everything, but what is wrong with me? Am I sterile or does someone else always manage to dabble in the spring at full moon ahead of me?”
Arsinoe thought for a moment. “I think you really must be sterile but don’t let it trouble you. A man who is given to meditation doesn’t need children and in our times many a man might envy you for having everything without assuming responsibility for the consequences. Perhaps it resulted from the thunderbolt of which you have told me, or perhaps you were ill as a child. Or it might be a gift of the goddess, since she has always favored pleasure and only with reluctance has submitted to its consequences.”
I would not have believed it possible that I could discuss such difficult matters with Arsinoe so understandingly and without the desire for revenge. It proved how much I had grown during my years with the Siccani without even realizing it. For once a dish is broken, anger is of no use. Instead, it is best to collect the pieces and make of them what one can.
But when I had confirmed the fact that Misme was not my child either, I felt myself naked and so cold that nothing could warm me. As a man I had to provide my own purpose in life, and probably nothing is more difficult. It is easier to beget children and to thrust the responsibility on them while washing one’s own hands.
I felt myself so naked that I retired to the solitude of the mountain for a few days. I did so not to see signs and omens but merely to listen to myself. Doubt swept over me and I no longer believed in my power to summon the wind. Everything was but blind chance. It was for Dorieus that the earth had trembled and the mountain spat fire when we had approached the Sicilian shore. Again it had rumbled at the moment of his death. He had even begotten a son. I alone was vagrant without knowing whence I had come or where I was going or why. I was sterile as a stone and my love brought suffering radier than joy.
5.
Upon my return from the mountain I collected a few Siccanian objects such as a bow and some flint-tipped arrows, a painted drum, some cloth made of tree bark, a wooden spear, snares and bone hooks, a wooden whistle for luring animals and a necklace of wild animals’ teeth, which I intended to send with Xenodotos to the Great King as a gift. No one forbade me to take anything since the Siccani do not take from one another unless in need.
The half moon shone in the sky during the day as though Artemis herself were benignly following my activities. When the sun was still up the Siccanians became restless and at dusk I took Hiuls by the hand and led him to the sacred rock. Like the Siccani I had become sensitive to events and no longer had to be invited.
Twelve old men, all wearing fearful wooden masks, were awaiting us by the sacred rock. I recognized them by their animal tails as priests, chiefs and holy men of the various tribes. They did not speak to me but upon our arrival they anointed the rock, lifted Hiuls atop it and gave him sweet berries to eat to pass the time.
They indicated that I was to take off my clothes. When I had done so they garbed me in a deerskin and covered my face with an antlered mask that was skillfully carved and painted. Thereafter everyone in turn, according to rank, drank a drop of the sacred potion from the wooden cup. I was last. Then they formed a line and began walking around the rock. I joined the end of the line. The beat of drums and the pipe of wooden whistles began to sound in the forest. Our walking changed to leaping and as the potion made itself felt the dance grew wild, with each of us emitting his animal cry. Hiuls was greatly amused by it, and whenever one of us imitated the cry of the animal whose tail he bore, Hiuls hooted like an owl. The Siccanians considered that a good omen.
The dance grew increasingly violent, the earth thinned into a veil around me and my blood throbbed in time to the drumbeat. Suddenly, to my amazement, I saw that animals were appearing from the forest, pushing through our circle to the rock and again fleeing. A wild boar crashed from the thicket with slavering tusks but no one attacked it and it thrust its way back into the woods. The last to appear was a gentle doe which paused by the rock to sniff at Hiuls with upstrctched neck and then bounded back.
I cannot explain how the Siccanians accomplished this. There were many of them in the forest, as the sound of the drums and the whistles indicated. Perhaps they had smeared the rock with tempting smells or had captured the animals for the purpose of releasing them during the dance. But the animals might have been merely shades conjured up by the Siccanians and made visible by the sacred potion. If that was so, I cannot explain how Hiuls could see them and afterwards describe every animal.
With the disappearance of the animals the dance ended and the Siccanians lighted a fire. Then they lifted Hiuls down from the rock and placed around his neck a necklace made of wild animals’ teeth and tied colored strips of hide around his ankles and wrists. Each slashed a wound into his own arm with a stone knife and let Hiuls suck it. They indicated that I also should slash my arm and let Hiuls taste my blood. When this had been done, the Siccanians burst into joyous laughter and sprinkled their blood over Hiuls until the boy was covered with it from head to toe.
Suddenly each seized a branch from the fire and disappeared into the forest. The priest of my tribe and I each took his burning branch and between us led Hiuls from the sacred rock. When the pine branches had burned out we tossed them away. The priest took off his mask and carried it in his hand. I also took off the deer mask that I had worn. We brought Hiuls home and put him to bed, but the priest forbade us to wash him until all the blood had worn off his skin.
I thought that that was the end of the matter but early the next day, before dawn, the priest came for me. He took me back to the sacred rock and laughingly showed me the marks of animals’ hoofs and nails on the ground, touched the rock and said that during the night the animals had licked the rock clean so that a stranger could no longer distinguish it from other rocks.
When we had crouched on the ground I said to the priest, “I am leaving the Siccani, for the time prescribed for me to rest with you has ended. Hiuls will remain with you, but his mother, Misme, and our slave Hanna will accompany me.”
The priest smiled, pointed northward and waved his hand as though in farewell. “I know that,” he said. “We were afraid that you would take the boy with you. Our tradition has predicted his arrival for as long as we can remember.”
Leaning on one elbow, he began drawing on the ground with a stick. “I am an old man,” he said. “With these eyes I have seen much happen. Fields are now being plowed with teams of oxen where formerly my father hunted wild animals. There are Siccanians who have built huts on the edge of the forest and grow peas. During my lifetime the Greeks have spread further than the Elymi ever have. They breed like vermin and have constrained the Siculi to cultivate land and build cities. He who builds a hut is the slave of his hut. He who cultivates land is the slave of his land. Only Erkle can now save us Siccanians but how it will happen we do not know.”
He covered his mouth with his hand, laughed, and continued, “I am only a foolish man and soon, when my knees fail me and my knowledge no longer serves my tribe, it will be time for me to go into the swamp. That is why I am talking so much, for I am very pleased. If you had tried to take the boy with you we would have had to kill you. But you brought Erkle to us and are leaving him here. That is why we consecrated you a deer and why you may have whatever you wish upon your departure.”