“Manmage,” he whispered.
“I did not want you to think I was untalented,” she said. “Or that my sons were only half-mages by their birth.”
“How can I trust anything I think or feel or decide, if you can make me swing from one longing to another in a moment?”
“Don’t base your decision on how you feel,” she said. “You never have; why start now? I came to you because you’re the steady one. You chose your loyalty and never wavered. I have no desire to change that loyalty-only to explain why your perfect loyalty should lead you to another course of action.”
“Another?” asked Keel. “I have no course of action, so I can hardly change it.”
“I will not attempt to control your decision,” said Anonoei, “but do remember how useless it is for you to try to lie to me. You’re a subtle man, Keel, and you tell your secrets to no one but me.”
“I have no secrets.”
“It will not be good for Iceway if King Prayard dies. Yes, my sons are alive, but I will not bring them back until they’re old enough to stand up for themselves. This is a bad time for the chaos of a dead king without an heir, or with only an unborn baby to inherit. The jarlingmoot will insist on electing an adult as king, breaking the line. But there’s no one ready to stand as king. Not even you.”
He knew that she was right.
“I want Queen Bexoi’s baby to be born alive,” said Anonoei. “It’s good for Iceway if Gray believes that a half-Gray child is next in line for Iceway’s throne.”
Because she was communicating with him at levels deeper than speech, he understood exactly what she meant. “You think the child can be controlled?”
“I think the mother means to kill the King herself and rule Iceway through him.”
“And you think this is a reason to allow the sparrowbitch to live?”
“I think this is a reason to keep the King away from her.”
“I’ll take her to an island far from here and strand her on the shore-will that do?”
“She would burn the ship to the waterline before she’d let it take her anywhere,” said Anonoei.
“A firemage,” said Keel. “Not a Feathergirl.”
“A Firemaster at least,” said Anonoei. “And so powerful she can make a clant that bleeds.”
Now Keel understood why Luvix had been so sure that he had killed Bexoi.
“I should have guessed it,” said Keel.
“No one else did,” said Anonoei.
“Except you,” said Keel.
“I don’t guess,” said Anonoei. “You must be more patient than you have been so far.”
“What if I choose to ignore your warning?”
“Then I’ll find someone else to help me,” said Anonoei, “and you can watch the people suffer as you destroy Iceway. As I said, my loyalty is not to Iceway, though our plans can help each other if you choose.”
“What do you want me to do?” said Keel, believing her but also knowing that his belief was probably the result of her magery.
“Give me time,” she said. “Give me a chance to go work my plans in Gray. Let me shape events so Gray’s ambitious heir grows impatient with his father. Let it be Gray that collapses in chaos, while Bexoi is here, nursing and protecting her second son. Let’s see whether her motherly love is stronger than her ambition. Either she’ll stay here and remain safe, or she’ll go-and leave her son behind.”
Keel did not have to say all that immediately came into his mind. That Anonoei wanted Bexoi’s son, and not one of her own, to be the pawn in the game of succession. That if Bexoi left her child behind, the child would be under Keel’s control. That if she took the child with her, King Prayard would be without an heir if something happened to Bexoi and the boy. That if she remained here in Nassassa, under Prayard’s protection, then Anonoei would have a free hand to work whatever mischief she and her gatemage friend might be planning for Gray.
It was a much better plan than anything that had been within Keel’s power.
“I wish I could trust my approval of your plan,” said Keel.
“I’m not that strong a manmage,” said Anonoei. “I can’t make you want what you do not want. I can’t make you fear what you do not fear. I can’t make you think of what you do not already know.”
“Then what can you do?”
“I can work on weak-minded people who don’t know what they want, who aren’t smart enough to fear what they should fear, and who think they know already what they do not know. That’s the drawback of manmagery-all our forced servants are weak and dull. So I come to you, not to be my servant, but to be my friend and ally.”
Keel thought of how, at a touch, she had made him want her.
But he must have shown on his face that he was thinking of this, because she shook her head. “I did not make you feel what you did not feel,” she said. “I made you aware of what you had always felt.”
And he knew that it was true. That all the time the King had loved Anonoei, Keel had also longed for her. He had such self-control that he had concealed his desire even from himself. But it was always there.
“Let’s be clear on one point,” said Anonoei. “I know you have that desire, and I am specifically not exploiting it. Whatever you do, you must do it in the full knowledge that I will never be yours. I have all the sons I need and want, and all the husbands, too. Do you understand?”
It was as if she had erected a wall of ice inside his loins. “I do not act for such reasons,” he said.
“That’s why you’re worth dealing with,” she said. “You’re good at what you do, and I am good at what I do, each within our limitations. Mage against mage, neither of us is a match for Bexoi. Perhaps no one is in all the world. But we won’t stand against her. In fact, we will stand with her, protecting her, protecting her son. As long as she and that boy are alive, Gray will be torn apart by conflicting ambitions. And by her choices, she will reveal herself and expose herself and, in the end, betray herself.”
“You have a plan far deeper than the one you’re telling me,” said Keel.
“And you will have plans within plans. But know this: I keep my word. I know that you keep yours. So if you promise me that you will act together with me, then I know that you’ll be my ally until you give me fair notice that our pact is over.”
“Yes,” said Keel. “You understand me well enough, and I make that pact. I will not take the King’s life. I will protect Bexoi and her baby. I will give you time to work your workings in Gray.”
Anonoei smiled. “I always knew you were the natural king of Iceway. Because only you act for the good of all, and not just for your family or your own ambition.”
“I have no ambition.”
“You have the large ambition of a patriot,” said Anonoei. She took him by the shoulders and kissed him on the mouth-not a woman’s kiss, but the kiss of a sister, a friend. “Count on me, and I will count on you.”
And then her hands were not on his shoulders, her breath not on his cheek. She was gone from the room, vanished in an instant. Her gatemage had taken her.
And Keel was left there alone with the deep longing for her that had never caused him pain before, because he had not known that it was there. He would die for her, kill for her. He loved her more than he loved his wife or his children, more than he loved his own life. More than he loved Iceway.
If only she would use her power to take this powerful desire away from him.
Yet if he lost that desire, who would he be? What would be in his heart then, if she were gone from it?
15
It wasn’t a real track meet. Officially, it was an “exhibition” between two high schools, Rockbridge County and Parry McCluer, months before the actual season began. More like two boxers sparring to keep in shape. Like pre-season football. Like nothing.