"If I must learn all this," Nynaeve broke in stiffly, "I would as soon learn something useful. All this – this ... 'Make the air stir, Nynaeve. Light the candle, Nynaeve. Now put it out. Light it again.' Paah!"
Egwene closed her eyes for a moment. Please, Nynaeve. Please keep a check on your temper. She bit her lip to keep from saying it out loud.
The Amyrlin was silent for a moment. "Useful," she said at last. "Something useful. You wanted a sword. Suppose a man came at me with a sword. What would I do? Something useful, you can be sure. This, I think."
For an instant, Egwene thought she saw a glow around the woman at the other end of her bed. Then the air seemed to thicken; nothing changed that Egwene could see, but she could surely feel it. She tried to lift her arm; it did not budge any more than if she were buried to her neck in thick jelly. Nothing could move except her head.
"Release me!" Nynaeve grated. Her eyes glared, and her head jerked from side to side, but the rest of her sat as rigidly as a statue. Egwene realized that she was not the only one held. "Let me go!"
"Useful, wouldn't you say? And it is nothing but Air." The Amyrlin spoke in a conversational tone, as if they were all chatting over tea. "Big man, with his muscles and his sword, and the sword does him as much good as the hair on his chest."
"Let me go, I say!"
"And if I don't like where he is, why, I can pick him up." Nynaeve squawked furiously as she slowly rose, still in a sitting position, until her head almost touched the ceiling. The Amyrlin smiled. "I've often wished I could use this to fly. The records say Aes Sedai could fly, in the Age of Legends, but they aren't clear on how, exactly. Not this way, though. It doesn't work like that. You might reach out with your hands and pick up a chest that weighs as much as you do; you look strong. But take hold of yourself however you will, you cannot pick yourself up."
Nynaeve's head jerked furiously, but not another muscle of her twitched. "The Light burn you, let me go!"
Egwene swallowed hard and hoped she was not also to be lifted.
"So," the Amyrlin continued, "big, hairy man, and so forth. He can do nothing to me, while I can do anything at all to him. Why, if I had a mind to" – she leaned forward, her eyes intent on Nynaeve; suddenly her smile did not seem very friendly – "I could turn him upside down and paddle his bottom. Just like – " Suddenly the Amyrlin flew backwards so hard her head rebounded from the wall, and there she stayed, as if something were pressing against her.
Egwene stared, her mouth dry. This isn't happening. It isn't.
"They were right," the Amyrlin said. Her voice sounded strained, as though she found it hard to breathe. "They said you learned quickly. And they said it took your temper burning to get to the heart of what you can do." She took a struggling breath. "Shall we release each other together, child?"
Nynaeve, floating in the air with her eyes ablaze, said, "You let me go right now, or I'll—" Abruptly a look of amazement came over her face, a look of loss. Her mouth worked slently.
The Amyrlin sat up, working her shoulders. "You don't know everything yet, do you, child? Not the hundredth part of everything. You did not suspect I could cut you off from the True Source. You can still feel it there, but you can't touch it any more than a fish can touch the moon. When you learn enough to be raised to full sisterhood, no one woman will be able to do that to you. The stronger you become, the more Aes Sedai it will take to shield you against your will. Do you think, now, you want to learn?" Nynaeve pressed her mouth shut in a thin line and stared her in the eye grimly. The Amyrlin sighed. "If you had a hair less potential than you do, child, I would send you to the Mistress of Novices and tell her to keep you the rest of your life. But you will get what you deserve."
Nynaeve's eyes widened, and she had just time to start a yell before she dropped, hitting her bed with a loud thud. Egwene winced; the mattresses were thin, and the wood beneath hard. Nynaeve's face stayed frozen as she shifted the way she sat, just a fraction.
"And now," the Amyrlin said firmly, "unless you would like further demonstration, we will get on with your lesson. Continue your lesson, we might say."
"Mother?" Egwene said faintly. She still could not twitch below her chin.
The Amyrlin looked at her questioningly, then smiled. "Oh. I am sorry, child. Your friend was occupying my attention, I'm afraid." Suddenly Egwene could move again; she raised her arms, just to convince herself that she could. "Are you both ready to learn?"
"Yes, Mother," Egwene said quickly.
The Amyrlin raised an eyebrow at Nynaeve.
After a moment, Nynaeve said in a tight voice, "Yes, Mother."
Egwene heaved a sigh of relief.
"Good. Now, then. Empty your thoughts of everything but a flower bud."
Egwene was sweating by the time the Amyrlin left. She had thought some of the other Aes Sedai had been hard teachers, but that smiling, plain-faced woman coaxed out every last drop of effort, drew it out, and when there was nothing left, she seemed to reach into you and pulled it out. It had gone well, though. As the door closed behind the Amyrlin, Egwene raised one hand; a tiny flame sprang to life, balanced a hairbreadth above the tip of her forefinger, then danced from fingertip to fingertip. She was not supposed to do this without a teacher – one of the Accepted, at the very least – to watch over her, but she was too excited at her progress to pay any mind to that.
Nynaeve bounded to her feet and threw her pillow at the closing door. "That – that vile, contemptible, miserable – hag! The Light burn her! I'd like to feed her to the fish. I'd like to dose her with things that would turn her green for the rest of her life! I don't care if she's old enough to be my mother, if I had her in Emond's Field, she wouldn't sit down comfortably for ..." Her teeth ground so loudly that Egwene jumped.
Letting the flame die, Egwene put her eyes firmly on her lap. She wished she could think of a way to sneak out of the room without catching Nynaeve's eye.
The lesson had not gone well for Nynaeve, because she had held her temper on a tight lead until the Amyrlin was gone. She never could do very much unless she was angry, and then it all burst out of her. After failure upon failure, the Amyrlin had done everything she could to rouse her again. Egwene wished Nynaeve could forget she had been there to see or hear any of it.
Nynaeve stalked stiffly to her bed and stood staring at the wall behind it, her fist clenched at her side. Egwene looked longingly at the door.
"It was not your fault," Nynaeve said, and Egwene gave a start.