“Hey, you didn’t bring me cookies!” Boggy said, annoyed. “A hundred and fifty years ago? You also didn’t bring me along to check out the fortress.”
“You were probably working.” Tizzy gave Boggy a glare. “Remember, you hadn’t eaten your accursed master then.”
“Well, technically, that would have been the grandfather of the accursed master that I ate,” Boggy pointed out.
“You ate your master?” Talarius said incredulously.
“Best way to get rid of him once and for all,” Boggy said.
“Seems pretty gross,” Reggie said. “But then, where I come from there’s this religion where every time they have a worship service, they eat bread and wine and pretend they are eating the body of their god. The oldest version of this religion actually believes the bread they eat and the wine they drink transubstantiate to become the actual physical flesh and blood of their god.”
“Ritualized cannibalism?” Talarius asked with distaste. “Clearly these people are heathens of the worst sort.”
Tom interrupted, “Guys, we are getting off track here.”
“Sorry. Back to the topic,” Reggie said. “Why didn’t I get cookies either?”
Tizzy held up his upper hands as if trying to placate them. “I’m sorry, but the cookies were a house-warming gift. Did you just move into a new Dark Fortress?”
“No, but Lord Tommus just did,” Zelda pointed out.
Tizzy closed his eyes and grabbed his horns with his upper hands, rocking his head from side to side. “Okay already, I’ll bring cookies to the feast! But it’s going to take me some time. Do you have any idea how long it is going to take me to bake three or four hundred dozen cookies in my oven? I can barely fit a whole dwarf in it!”
Boggy gave him an odd look. “You have an oven? I’ve never seen it.”
“Guys... please?” Tom felt like he was going to lose it. He was under enough stress as it was; trying to work with Larry, Moe, Curly and Shemp all at once was too much. “I have to get back to open a gate for the next hunting party. So let’s get to what needs to be done.”
Antefalken frowned. “What were we trying to do? I’ve forgotten at this point.”
“We were talking about teaching Vaselle and Damien the Cool spell,” Tom said. “Or maybe they could make amulets or something like Talarius’s armor. Actually, that would be the best thing.”
Antefalken scratched his chin. “Well Vaselle told Damien and me that he runs a shop and creates arcane devices. I am not sure what type, and I am sure Damien could make one too. Let me discuss it with them this afternoon when Damien summons me.”
“Fine. I will contact Vaselle and have him get some clothes for Edwyrd, and we’ll come by.”
“Who’s Edwyrd?” Reggie asked.
“He’s me — it’s my human form,” Tom said, noting the knight turn to face him.
“So you are the Lord Edwyrd who sank the Oorstemothian ship?” the knight asked.
Tom sighed. “Yes, I was disguised as a human so as not to cause a panic. We were told the Oorstemothians were pirates attacking our ship, and having been hired to defend the ship from pirates, we tried to defend it. But then they nearly killed Rupert — in fact, I thought he was dead — so I sort of took the battle to them and sank their ship.”
Talarius was silent for a moment, thinking. “That makes some sense, but — ”
“But being a demon, I can’t be trusted with the truth! Do you want to really know what was going on?” Tom asked. “Let’s get it out there before I go sending more D’Orcs into Astlan.”
“Go ahead,” Talarius said.
“Exador’s men ambushed a caravan with Rupert, Jenn and a bunch of others from Lenamare’s school who were fleeing Exador’s siege of the school. Gastropé was one of the soldiers, but Jenn fought him to a standstill. Jehenna summoned me; but she used a broken ring, so I came through of my own free will. Everyone else fled or perished, so I agreed to escort Rupert and Jenn to Freehold for their safety.”
Zelda, Reggie and Talarius had never heard this story and so were watching Tom closely.
“In any event, along the way, Exador sent several major demons to locate us and they distracted me and managed to capture Jenn.” Tom sighed. How many times had he told this story now? “Rupert came up with a scheme to infiltrate their camp as a lost boy, not unlike what he did in your camp.” Talarius nodded. “They put him in the tent with Jenn and Gastropé. Rupert, being a demon, was able to free himself from his ropes and then freed Jenn and summoned me. I opened a portal and pulled Jenn, Rupert and Gastropé into my cave.”
“These two people were either very brave or stupid,” Talarius said.
“Well, if you know Exador, he’s not a pleasant person. Staying was not an option,” Tom said. “Actually, given that we now know he is an archdemon, I can say he is pretty much everything you, Talarius, expect an archdemon to be. Not all demons are, but in Exador’s case — he seems to fit the stereotype.” Tom shook his head.
“Anyway, Gastropé and Jenn used this Cool spell to survive the heat in my cave, but it wouldn’t last long, so I had to find a way back to Astlan. I went searching and found your high priest, Verigas, summoning a demon of his own. I intercepted that call and opened a portal to let Rupert, Jenn and Gastropé back into Astlan. We tried to assure your priest we meant no harm, but he apparently overreacted and called out the Rod once we left. I was just trying to get Jenn and Rupert to safety in Freehold.”
Tom shook both hands in Talarius’s direction. “So, to be clear: there was no planned invasion, no nothing! All of that Lord Edwyrd’s invading demon horde crap was made up by Verigas to make himself look good after admitting to summoning demons. And the Oorstemothians? Well, they shot first; I considered it self-defense.”
Talarius just shook his head. “What a complicated story you have created.”
“Look, you can believe it or not, I don’t care. I have now told you the truth; I have put it out there. I have yet to lie to you about anything. So you can judge for yourself based on what you see me do.”
Talarius seemed to shrug. “I will take your story under advisement, as I do everything else.”
“That’s all I ask.” Tom sighed. “Antefalken, are we set? I am going to visit Vaselle later this afternoon; you tell me when. He and Edwyrd will then come visit you and Damien. We can put Damien’s mind at ease and discuss constructing some sort of Abyssal life support system for Astlanians.”
Antefalken nodded. “I expect him to summon me about a period after noon local time. Anytime after that.”
Tom nodded. “So early fourth period; that works.”
After a small eternity, the D’Wargs had been saddled, and the D’Orcs verified they had fastened securely. Tal Gor had run to his tent to retrieve his crossbow and quiver of arrows. He had not used them for much other than practice in years. Since the wyvern, he had only hunted small game and his crossbow was a bit over-powered for that, so he had been using bow and arrows. For large game, though, the crossbow was ideal.
All the D’Orcs had been amazed to see Schwarzenfürze harnessed. It was obvious that she was not much enjoying the gear, but she was permitting it. It took a few tries and a fair amount of patience from the D’Warg, but eventually he was mounted. Schwarzenfürze squirmed and seemed to be trying to force Tal Gor to a more balanced location while the other orcs mounted their D’Wargs.
Vespa lined them up two by two so that each orc could launch one at a time. Three D’Orcs hovered in the air around the takeoff area, prepared to help if any of the orcs had issues. Naturally, the orcs grumbled about being babysat, but the huntmaster was adamant; he wanted them to get some practice in first and be prepared for the eventual chases of the hunt.