Callie went straight to the bathroom and washed her face, nausea welling inside her. This was really, really gross. As soon as she felt clean, she ran to her bedroom and pulled on a pair of sweats. Her body was one big goose bump. Before she finished dressing, she heard the Hummer pull up. She quickly jerked on a pair of thick socks before hurrying to the front door. She opened it as Rogar came up the steps, taking them two at a time.
“You made it home,” he said. The worried creases on his forehead faded. “Why did you shift?” He closed the door behind him as he came inside. “Were you in danger?”
“I didn’t mean to shift. It…just happened.” Oh, God, what if she shifted at work or when her landlady came over for the rent?
“You look ill,” he said, and led her toward the sofa.
“I feel ill. Rogar, I didn’t try to shift.”
“What happened?”
She grimaced when she began to think about it. “Constance showed up. She was being her usual bitchy self and began telling her friends how low class I am. I got angry.”
He relaxed. “Ah, that explains it. When a Symtarian becomes very emotional, they will often shift to an animal form. Their guide, if they’ve connected. With men, it’s usually after very passionate sex.”
Like Rogar did after they made love. She didn’t know why that should please her, but it did. Well, except she had to dive for the nearest door before he finished the change.
She was still a little confused, though. “Why now? This never happened before.”
“Because you’re becoming more in sync with your animal guide. The more you shift, the closer you’ll get to her.”
“I haven’t found her, but I thought I heard her talking to me tonight.”
“That’s good. You only have to trust that she will lead you in the right direction.”
“But what if she’s wrong? Does that ever happen?”
He shrugged. “Sometimes. But they’re better able to observe our actions. They’re not directly connected, so they can see with a better perspective than we can. Sometimes we want to listen with our heart, rather than our heads.”
That made sense. Sort of.
“But wouldn’t that work both ways?”
“I often tell Balam if I think he’s wrong.”
“Does he listen?”
Rogar laughed. A deep resonating sound that sent shivers of pleasure over her. She realized again just how hard it was going to be to let him go.
“I don’t think Balam ever listens to me, but he is a good friend.”
“And you’re not afraid he’ll…uh…hurt one of your friends?”
“He wouldn’t.”
“You’re sure he wouldn’t harm anyone?”
“Yes. Very sure. Would you like to meet him?”
For a brief second, excitement flittered through her. Of course she wanted to meet him. Her dream was to work around the big cats. They were magnificent animals. But to be up close and personal?
“Balam wants to meet you,” he urged.
She narrowed her eyes. “If he eats me, I swear I’m coming back to haunt you.”
“Everything will be fine. Remember, Balam is also a part of me, just as your guide is a part of you.”
She nodded, then took a deep breath as he closed his eyes. Her nerves stretched taut when he began to change. As always, a thick fog rolled in. What the hell was she thinking? She couldn’t stay in the same room as a jaguar. She started to get up.
Trust Rogar. Balam won’t harm you.
Callie stilled, tears filling her eyes, because she finally recognized the voice from her childhood. “You’re my guide.” She felt as though she had found an old friend.
The fog cleared. There was a deep, guttural purr beside her. She flinched. Then swallowed hard as she stared into the dark eyes of the black jaguar.
“Hello…uh…Balam.” Her voice squeaked. She only hoped he didn’t think she was a mouse.
When Balam came to his feet on the seat beside her, she shifted away. As though that would make any difference. If he wanted, he could be on her in a heartbeat, mighty jaws clamping down on her head. She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath, and trying to dispel that image from her mind.
The big cat moved closer. Callie stayed perfectly still. Balam smelled her hair, her shoulder. Was he deciding if she would make a good meal? This was not good. Why had she let Rogar talk her into meeting his guide? Why had…
A big tongue licked up the side of her face. Oh, great, he was tasting her.
But then he laid down, his head across her lap, and turned on his back. Before she could wonder what he was going to do next, one humongous paw reached up and caressed her face.
She hadn’t expected that. She looked into the jag’s eyes and saw something there she hadn’t previously seen: kindness, gentleness.
Tentatively, she stroked his fur. He closed his eyes and purred. Then it dawned on her. She was petting a jaguar. Hell, a jaguar was lying in her lap. Sure, he was really heavy, but this was cool.
They probably sat there for hours, with her gently stroking his fur. Sometimes it seemed they were silently communicating. Not only was she getting to know Rogar’s guide, but maybe in an odd sort of way, her own.
She must have dozed as the hour grew late, because the next thing she knew, Balam was moving. She yawned and opened her eyes, then glanced down. But it was no longer Balam, Rogar had returned.
She smiled down at him. “Thank you.”
“I told you he wouldn’t hurt you. He’s too much a part of me to ever harm you. Besides, he said he liked you, and that you give good back rubs.”
“I never thought I’d ever get that close to a jaguar. In the classes I took, they taught on the side of caution.”
“But that’s not the Symtarian way when it comes to animals. We are taught to be one with them.”
“I think Balam was right.”
Still half asleep, she smiled. “Right about what?”
“You do give great back rubs.”
Her hand stilled as his words sank in. She was lightly caressing his back, running her fingers through his hair. Her gaze drifted over him.
And he was quite naked.
Chapter 25
Rogar sat up. “I want you.” Which was obvious, but Callie couldn’t blame him. Not when she was touching him like this. Innocent? Yes. Sensuous? Painfully so. And by the gods, he hoped she didn’t stop.
It wasn’t as though he could turn off his emotions when she was around. On the contrary, it was more as though each of his senses were heightened when she was near.
He studied her. She nibbled her bottom lip, not commenting. Why did she fight the attraction? He knew she felt the same. Was Callie afraid he would seduce her into going back to New Symtaria with him? That he wouldn’t fight fair?
She’d be correct in her assumption.
The thought of leaving her behind shook him to the core. He’d come to care for her so much in such a short time. He didn’t want to go home without her. Was seducing her the answer?
It would be underhanded and dirty.
He only hoped it worked.
Rogar leaned in, brushing strands of hair from her face. “Spend this time with me—while we still can be together.”
She sniffed. Not the response he’d hoped for. He nuzzled her neck, then swirled his tongue inside her ear. She gasped, clutching his shoulders.
That was more like it.
He brought his lips to hers. She caressed his tongue with hers. Flames of desire flared inside him. No woman had ever ignited his passion as quickly as Callie. Maybe she had bewitched him. But what a sweet bewitching it was.
He slid his hand under her top. Sweet torture! She wore nothing beneath it. His erection throbbed with the need to bury himself deep inside her, but he didn’t want to rush. No, it was much better to draw out their mating.
He cupped her breast, his thumb scraping across the taut nipple. Still he needed more. He ended the kiss, pulled her top over her head, and tossed it to the side, then drew in a deep breath as he stared at her. She was perfection.