"You're being unreasonable. Why don't you hear me out first?"
"Listen to you describe your hallucinations? You think I'd enjoy that?"
"The animals here, the bird with the broken wing, the way those flowers we thought were dying in the garden picked up—none of it's natural."
"How would you know? What do you know about anything that's beyond city walls, anything that's beyond the gutter?"
I stared at her aghast and she avoided my eyes.
Midge was kneeling before me and her chest was rising in exaggerated movement as though her anger could barely be contained. She gained control, then said in a low, almost resentful voice, "I didn't mean that. I'm sorry—"
She broke off and pushed herself away, her tears finally breaking through to join with the rain-dampness already on her cheeks. She ran from me, slamming the bedroom door behind her. I could hear her muffled sobs.
I sat there stunned. Confused, too. Totally. What the hell had happened? To me. To her. What the hell had happened?
I slugged back the rest of the brandy, nearly choking on its raw heat, then put the glass on the floor. I wiped my eyes and cheeks with my hands and wasn't sure which was damper, face or palms. Beginning to rise, knowing I couldn't let matters rest there, couldn't leave Midge in such mistaken misery, I was stopped by a remote scrabbling sound. It came from behind the sofa.
I stood, afraid because I was still disorientated and vulnerable; there wasn't much more I could take that afternoon. The noise persisted. Stepping to the end of the sofa, I peered into the shadowy abyss between the back of the chair and the curved wall. And was relieved to discover what was hidden down there.
I pulled the sofa away from the wall, exposing the tiny, shivering figure of Rumbo, his tail fluffed up, his paws digging at the carpet in nervous agitation.
With a quick, startled look at me, he shot from his hiding place, across the room and out through the door that was still open, quickly vanishing into the foliage beyond.
I wondered why I had the feeling a sinking ship had just been deserted.
CLOSER
ON SECOND thoughts, I decided not to go in to Midge straight away: she would be easier to deal with when her anger had cooled. Besides, there was something of a storm going on inside my own head which another brandy might help ease. Picking up the glass again, I went downstairs to the kitchen. All our liquor (of which there wasn't much) was stored away in the bottom of the larder (as good a drinks cabinet as any), but the brandy bottle was still on the table where Midge had left it.
I scraped the chair against the tiles and was already reaching for the bottle before I sat. The brandy really didn't help much, but at least I had something to do while my nerves settled.
You may consider I'd been a bit slow in realizing things weren't quite normal down here in the country, but none of what I've previously mentioned seemed so unnatural—apart from this last incident—at the time. Unusual, yeah, but not spectacular. It's worth repeating: the mind has a way of naturalizing the unnatural. Even the moving painting could be explained away as an hallucination (and at the time I was convinced that had to be the case, although not because of drugs indulged in the night before, as Midge had suggested). There was an abundance of nature here, is all. And the atmosphere of the place created its own magic, keened our senses so that Midge's artistic skill was heightened, my musicianship enhanced. I believe certain environments can bring out the best or worst in someone, and Gramarye had done just that with me and Midge. Maybe the dull weather of late had changed the mood, and now something bad had surfaced from inside us; I hadn't often seen Midge act like this, that's for sure.
I sipped and brooded down there in the kitchen (where
Flora Chaldean had withered away), and I hoped I hadn't scared off poor Rumbo for good. God knows how I'd appeared to him, tripping-out in front of the picture, and no wonder he'd dug in behind the sofa. The look he'd given me before bolting past my legs was as though I were about to introduce him to squirrel pie—from the inside looking out.
The glass was soon empty and I resisted pouring another. I was still bewildered by my freak-out and still upset by Midge's remarks, but sulking down there in the gloom wasn't going to help matters. Time to talk to her, time to be friends again. I climbed the stairs, closing the hallway door to stop rain drizzling in. The doormat there was wretched and soggy and I knew just how it felt.
Midge's anorak was lying in a heap on the bedroom floor and she was lying in a heap on the bed, legs curled up, shoulders hunched over, fetal and looking very lonely. The dampness in the air had made the room smell musty. I stood in the doorway, almost hesitant to go in further; I felt guilty and didn't know why.
"Midge . . . ?" I ventured.
No response at first. Then she rested on one elbow so she could look across at me. Her hand stretched out toward me and I hurried over to lie beside her. My arms went around her waist and back and I hugged her close; she lay against me, trembling and sniffling.
My cheek nuzzled against her forehead and the scent of rain and fresh air was still in her hair. "Midge, I want you to believe me—I stuck strictly to booze yesterday. I admit I had a lot, but I didn't touch anything else, no pills, no drugs—nothing like that."
She stiffened against me, the trembling abated for a moment. Then I felt her body slump.
"So what happened in there, Mike?" she whispered. "Why did you look that way, why did you say my painting came alive?"
"I wish I understood, myself," I sighed. "It seemed so real to me, as if I were inside the picture itself, walking up the path, smelling the flowers, feeling everything around me." I had to smile. "Remember that old film where Gene Kelly danced with the cartoon mouse? Well it was almost like that, as if real life and animation had come together, but with no black lines around the painted parts. So much more real, nothing to do with fantasy. And scary. Jesus, I've never been so frightened." I pulled back my head to look at her face and her eyes were mournfully wide. "You've gotta believe me, Midge," I all but pleaded.
"I guess I do," she responded, and a familiar softness returned to her expression. "They said there might be long-lasting aftereffects, that nobody knew precisely how long certain drug traces might remain in the system. But all these years . . . ?"
"Doesn't seem possible, does it? That has to be the answer, though. Unless I'm going crazy."
"You mean you used to be sane?" Feeble, and spoken in a doleful voice, but at least it was a stab at humor. My fingers tucked into her hair at the back of her head.
"You must have a check-up, Mike. It could be dangerous for you."
"No real harm done, just a fright for both of us."
"More than that. What if it happens again only with worse consequences?"
I didn't inquire what they might be. "I'm tired, I've been up most of the night talking old times and drinking with Bob. And we'd worked hard at the session yesterday. Maybe I'm more exhausted than I realized. The combination of weariness and alcohol may have sparked off something that's still sneaking around inside me." I wanted to say: But it could be the cottage itself, Midge. Maybe there's something going on here that's way beyond our comprehension, something that creates illusions (hadn't I seen a hundred bats at least inside the loft when there weren't half as many? Didn't I keep seeing someone watching us from the edge of the woods? Hadn't I been absorbed into a painting so that I'd become a part of it, a human element walking in living paint?), some kind of Magic that cures sick animals, and even people if the stories about Flora Chaldean were to be believed (and what about my own arm? Had the Synergists healed the burns, or had Gramarye worked its powers during the night while I slept? Their green liquid might have stopped the pain, but had it really soothed away the burns?) That's what I wanted to say, but it sounded ridiculous enough in my own mind. Midge would have thought I'd really flipped, and my fear was that she'd be right. So I kept quiet when I should have brought everything out into the open there and then. At least that way Midge might have been given cause to acknowledge some of her own feelings concerning Gramarye, intuitions that she was unable to accept consciously. It wasn't to be, though, not just then.