"How can I keep her from crying, Ayla? How will I know when to feed her if she doesn't cry?" Fralie said.
"Both Frebec and Crozie must help you because she must be with you every moment, just as though you were still pregnant, Fralie. I think the best way would be to make a carrier that will hold her to your breast. That way, you will keep her warm. She will be comforted by your closeness and the sound of your heart, because she is used to it. But most important, any time she wants to nurse, she need only turn her head to reach your nipple, Fralie. Then she won't use up strength she needs for growing with crying."
"What about changing her?" Crozie asked.
"Coat her skin with some of that soft tallow I gave you, Crozie; I'll make more. Use clean, dry, dung packed around her to absorb her waste. Throw it out when she needs changing, but don't move her too much. And you must rest, Fralie, and not move around too much with her. It will do you good, too. We need to try to keep your cough calmed down. If she can survive the next few days, then every day she lives will make her stronger. With your help, Frebec, and Crozie, she has a chance."
A feeling of subdued hope pervaded the lodge as the drapes were closed on a red sun settling into a bank of clouds hovering on the horizon. Most people had finished their evening meal, and were stoking fires, cleaning things up, putting down children, and gathering together for the evening conversation and company. Several people were sitting around the fireplace of the Mammoth Hearth, but conversation was held down to a low murmur, as though loud voices were somehow inappropriate.
Ayla had given Fralie a mild relaxing drink, and left her to sleep. She would get little enough sleep in the days to come. Most infants settled into a routine of sleeping for a reasonable time before waking up to be fed, but Fralie's new baby couldn't nurse very long at one time, and therefore didn't sleep much before needing to nurse again. Fralie would have to get her sleep in a series of short naps, too, until the baby grew stronger.
It was almost strange to see Frebec and Crozie working together, helping each other to help Fralie, and being exceedingly courteous and restrained. It might not last, but they were trying, and some of their animosity seemed to be draining off.
Crozie had gone to bed early. It had been a difficult day and she wasn't so young any more. She was tired and she expected to be up to help Fralie later. Crisavec was still sleeping with Tulie's son, and Tronie was keeping Tasher. Frebec sat alone at the Crane Hearth, looking at the fire, feeling mixed emotions. He felt anxious and protective over the tiny infant, the first child of his hearth, and fearful. Ayla had put her in his arms to hold for a few moments while she and Crozie were making Fralie comfortable. He stared at her, awed that someone so small could be so perfect. Her diminutive hands even had fingernails. He was afraid to move, afraid he would break her, and was greatly relieved when Ayla took her back, yet he was reluctant to let her go.
Suddenly Frebec stood up and started down the passageway. He didn't want to be alone on this night. He stopped at the edge of the Mammoth Hearth and looked at the people sitting around the fire. They were the younger people of the Camp, and in the past, he would have walked by them on his way to the cooking hearth to visit with Talut and Nezzie or Tulie and Barzec or Manuv or Wymez or, lately, with Jondalar, and sometimes Danug. Even though Crozie was often at the cooking hearth, it was easier to ignore her than to face the possibility of being ignored by Deegie or disdained by Ranec. But Tornec had been friendly earlier, and his woman had given birth, and he knew how it felt. Frebec took a deep breath and walked toward the fireplace.
They broke into laughter just as he reached Tornec, and for a moment, he thought they were laughing at him. He was tempted to leave.
"Frebec! There you are!" Tornec said.
"I think there is still some tea left," Deegie said. "Let me pour you some."
"Everyone tells me she's a beautiful little girl," Ranec said. "And Ayla says she has a chance."
"We're lucky to have Ayla here," Tronie said.
"Yes, we are," Frebec replied. No one said anything for a moment. It was the first good word Frebec had ever said about Ayla.
"Maybe she can be named at the Spring Festival," Latie said. Frebec hadn't noticed her sitting next to Mamut in the shadow. "That would be good luck."
"Yes, it would," Frebec said, reaching for the cup Deegie gave him, and feeling a little more comfortable.
"I'm going to have a part in the Spring Festival, too," she announced, half-shyly and half-proudly.
"Latie is a woman," Deegie told him with the slightly condescending air of a big sister informing another adult who is knowledgeable.
"She will have her Rites of First Pleasures at the Summer Meeting this year," Tronie added.
Frebec nodded, and smiled at Latie, not quite sure what to say.
"Is Fralie still sleeping?" Ayla asked.
"She was when I left."
"I think I will go to bed, too," she said, getting up. "I'm tired." She put her hand on Frebec's arm. "Will you come and get me when Fralie wakes up?"
"Yes, I will, Ayla… and… uh… thank you," he said softly.
"Ayla, I think she's growing," Fralie said. "I'm sure she feels heavier, and she's starting to look around. She's nursing longer, too, I think."
"It's been five days. I think she may be getting stronger," Ayla agreed.
Fralie smiled, then tears came to her eyes. "Ayla, I don't know what I would have done without you. I've been blaming myself for not coming to you sooner. This pregnancy didn't feel right from the beginning, but when mother and Frebec started fighting, I couldn't take sides."
Ayla just nodded.
"I know Mother can be difficult, but she has lost so much. She was a headwoman, you know."
"I guessed as much."
"I was the oldest of four children, I had two sisters and a brother… I was about Latie's age when it happened. Mother took me to the Deer Camp to meet the son of their headwoman. She wanted to arrange a union. I didn't want to go, and I didn't like him when I met him. He was older, and more concerned about my status than me, but before the visit was over, she managed to get me to agree. The arrangements were made for our joining at the Matrimonial the next summer. When we got back to our Camp… oh, Ayla, it was awful!" Fralie closed her eyes, trying to control herself.
"No one knows what happened… there was a fire. It was an old lodge, built by Mother's uncle. People said the thatching, and wood, and bone must have been all dried out. They think it must have started at night… no one got out…"
"Fralie, I'm sorry," Ayla said.
"We had no place to go, so we turned around and went back to the Deer Camp. They were sorry for us, but not happy about it. They were afraid of bad luck, and we'd lost status. They wanted to break the agreement, but Crozie argued before the Council of Sisters and held them to it. The Deer Camp would have lost influence and status if they'd backed out. I was joined that summer, Mother said I had to. It was all we had left, but there was never much happiness in the union, except for Crisavec and Tasher. Mother was always fighting with them, particularly with my man. She was used to being headwoman, used to making decisions and having respect. It wasn't easy for her to lose it. She couldn't give it up. People started thinking of her as a bitter, nagging complainer, and didn't want to be around her." Fralie paused, then continued.
"When my man was gored by an aurochs, the Deer Camp said we were bad luck, and made us leave. Mother tried to arrange another union for me. There was some interest. I still had my birth status, they can't take away what you are born with, but no one wanted Mother. They said she was bad luck, but I think they just didn't like her complaining all the time. I couldn't blame her, though. They just didn't understand.