“Mom!”
“Well, do you?”
“Mom, God. Stop.”
“I’m just asking,” I said. I smiled at her. “It’s okay to like a boy, you know. I’d expect you to like boys by now. Or girls. You know I don’t care…”
“Oh my God, Mom!” she said, squeezing her eyes shut. “Seriously. Don’t be gross.”
“There’s nothing gross about liking boys. Or girls. It’s perfectly natural.”
She scooped up her bag and binder. “I’m going to my room now.”
“Okay. We can talk about who you like later.”
She groaned, then made a screaming sound through her teeth. Her room was just off the dining room and she slammed the door behind her.
I smiled.
Messing with your kids was one of the biggest benefits of being a mom.
TWELVE
Jake was home just after dark and we all sat down at the table for meatloaf and tater tots. Except for Will, who, again for ethical reasons and stubbornness, refused to eat meat. Instead, he piled his plate high with a mountain of tater tots and gave a running critique as to how they were the third best tater tots he’d ever had. Afterward, the kids cleared the table and then scattered in different directions; Emily to do homework, Will to sneak in another game of Minecraft and the girls to plan the third Barbie wedding of the week.
I retreated to the kitchen to tackle the sink full of dinner dishes. I was standing at the sink, scrubbing the loaf pan that had contained the meatloaf, when Jake came up behind me and snaked his arms around my waist.
“Hi, wife,” he whispered in my ear.
“Hi, husband.”
He kissed my neck and I shivered. “I missed you today.”
“I miss you every day,” I told him.
“It’s not a competition. And that’s what I meant.”
I chuckled and ran the dishes under warm water. “Right.”
He nodded his head at the faucet. “Any issues with that today?”
“Nope. Your mad skills with the hair dryer worked.”
He chuckled and pulled me tighter. “Will just finished grilling me about visiting hours at jails,” he said.
I stiffened.
“Anything you want to share with me?”
I’d avoided telling him about my confrontation with Olga because I didn’t want to get into it at dinner with all four of the kids around. I wasn’t keeping it from him, but I didn’t want four other opinions about what happened either and the kids would’ve felt obligated to offer their best advice.
I shut the water off. “I was going to tell you.”
“Before or after you were arrested?”
“Stop.”
“Just saying. Didn’t know what your plan was.”
I dried off my hands and turned to face him. “I was going to tell you as soon as we were alone.”
“So when Grace moves out?” He pretended to do math in his head. “Ten years from now?”
I tapped him lightly in the chest. “I was going to tell you when little ears weren’t listening.”
He glanced over his shoulder. “It seems clear now.”
So I told him about Olga and our confrontation and her accusations.
He blinked several times. “You pushed another woman?”
“She pushed me first.”
“What grade are you in again? I forget.”
“Jake, she pushed me first,” I said. “And she was standing on the sidewalk, saying terrible things about me. I wasn’t going to just let her do that.”
“Did you do those terrible things?”
“Of course not.”
He smiled. “So then they were irrelevant and you probably didn’t need to start a brawl on the street.”
“It wasn’t a brawl.”
“Streetfight. Sorry.”
“We didn’t even push each other that hard.”
“But to be clear. You did end up wrestling in the snow?”
I thought for a second. “I think we more just fell down in it.”
“And had to be separated by officers of the law, correct?”
I put my arms around his neck. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”
“Don’t try to use your feminine wiles on me,” he said, pulling back. “I’m trying to find out exactly what went on here and…”
I kissed him hard on the mouth and he made a sound like a moan before kissing me back. We came up for air and he blinked again several times.
“I forget what we were talking about,” he said.
I grinned. “Feminine wiles win again.”
“Like always.”
A small stampede crashed down the stairs and we both turned toward the living room. Will leapt from the bottom step and then careened into the couch. The two younger girls followed and pinned him to the sofa.
“Help!” he screamed. “Mom! Help!”
“Why?” I asked.
“He took our Barbie wedding cake!” Sophie yelled. “It’s in his pockets!”
“I’m gonna pull your pants off!” Grace yelled, yanking furiously on his sweatpants.
“Be quiet!” Emily’s voice was muffled from behind her closed bedroom door. She was the only one with a main floor bedroom. “I’m trying to study!”
The other three ignored her, hooting and hollering. Will tried to keep a straight face but burst into laughter as both girls held him down. They started laughing, too and soon they all fell to the ground, a squirming, giggling mess.
I untangled myself from Jake’s arms and reached for the stack of mail on the kitchen counter. “Forgot to tell you. We got something from the window people today.”
Jake rolled his eyes. “I’ll bet it’s not a refund.”
I plucked the envelope from the stack and held it out. “I don’t know because I didn’t look.”
He took it from me and tore it open. His eyes scanned it for a moment and his expression soured.
“What?” I asked.
“The estimate to replace the upstairs windows went up by a couple hundred bucks,” he said, shaking his head. “Because we have lead-based paint and I don’t know what else.”
“We don’t have to get them,” I said. “We can wait.”
He tossed the letter on the table. “No, we can’t. It’s too cold up there. We need them replaced.” He sighed. “I just need to rob a bank or something.”
“No more crimes!” Will yelled from the floor of the living room.
“Yeah, Will says we are going to be going to visit someone in jail soon,” Sophie says Her glasses were perched precariously on the bridge of her nose. “Are we going to get to go to jail?”
Will’s face colored.
“I want to wear handcuffs!” Grace yelled, sitting on top of Will’s chest.
“No one’s going to jail,” Jake said, shaking his head again. “And I was kidding about robbing a bank. Sort of. But this house has turned into a complete money pit.”
“Stop being so cranky,” I said, hugging him from behind. “And we can wait on the windows.”
“No, we need it done,” he said over his shoulder to me. “But this house is a money pit. The more we put in, the more it needs.”
“Should we move?” I asked.
He turned around, a half-smile on his face. “What would you do if I said yes?”
“Use my feminine wiles again.”
“So, see, there’s no point.”
I squeezed him.
“This house isn’t a money pit,” Will announced, tossing Grace onto Sophie and scrambling to his feet. His hair hung in front of his eyes and I reminded myself again how badly he needed a hair cut.
“What is it then? Jake asked.
He grinned. “With the dead guy in the coal chute? It’s a murder pit.”
THIRTEEN
“How many books can we get, Momma?” Grace asked, unbuckling her seatbelt.
“Five,” I said. “Five each.”
It was the next morning and it was library day. Not some recognized national day, but our family’s library day. We tried to go at least once a week and every one of the kids looked forward to the trip. When Emily started school, it was one of the things she actually voiced that she missed about being homeschooled. I’d felt nothing but satisfaction at her admission. Reading was a source of pride with me, always had been. I’d forced books on my kids from the day they were born and, as it turned out, it had been completely unnecessary because all of them liked to read. Or maybe they liked to read because I’d read aloud nearly every children’s book in print. Sophie was a voracious reader, too, and she’d happily announced that being able to go to the library during the day was just about her most favorite thing ever about homeschooling.