An hour passed.
It was still lit.
Two hours. Three.
Shit.
Fuck. Maybe Lancelot was right. Maybe this was worse, and he should talk to her. He’d never been this riddled with uncertainty in all his life.
He opened the door as quietly as he could. “Guinevere?” It was barely loud enough to be a whisper.
Silence answered. The panic that she was dead was immediate— irrational, but not—and he rushed to her side. She lay still, lifeless. He knelt, ready to give her a frantic shake, but he made himself wait and watch with his hand poised over her shoulder.
Her chest rose and fell steadily.
Then Arthur realized—she was sleeping on the side he always used to sleep on. The others hadn’t done that either. Her fingers still rested in the book, marking her page. Her arms and legs were both curled in close.
She was cold.
Very carefully, he slid the book from beneath her fingers and, not wanting to lose her page, found a scrap of parchment from his desk to tuck into it before he closed it on the table. She was on top of the blankets on the bed, so he went to the chest and drew out another and laid that over her, gingerly pulling it up to her shoulders.
Before he had a moment to think better of it, Arthur reached down and tucked a few stray hairs behind her ear. She did not stir. Her breath did not change. But her furrowed brow smoothed and for one fleeting moment, a soft smile rose on her lips.
Arthur was so stunned that he sunk down on one knee to be at eye level with her sleeping face. It had been so quick, but she had smiled. He was sure of it. And the crease between her brows had not returned.
His lips tugged up at the corners as he watched her because, just now, she did look a little bit … happy.
He decided right there, kneeling on the floor at her side: this was what he would do. Arthur would care for her in every quiet, invisible way he could find. He’d watch what brought her delight and silently deliver it. He’d notice what released the tension from her shoulders and shift castle life to bring that peace.
He rose, went to the opposite side of the bed, and lowered the light before he retreated to his room. Though he knew better than to think it anything other than a coincidence, he could not shake the whisper of hope that she had smiled at his touch.
Or perhaps it was merely wishful thinking.
Acknowledgments
This book exists because of a long line of support, care, and magic.
I could lay out pages of gratitude, but I’ll do my best to rein it in. From the bottom of my heart, thank you—to Mike, who didn’t know he taught me how to build the muscle of persistence necessary to write a book, and to Lochlyn, who is the smartest and most creative person I know and who inspires me with stories every single day.
To my family, especially Dad & Deb, Erin & Kyle (and the boys!), and Mom, who watched my starry-eyed delusions and said, “Go!”
To a wide crew of beloved friends: The Twelve and their endless alpha reading, proofing, and encouragement, The MoonBass crew, the Saturday Coffee Club, The Beavers, the staff and community of Peace Church KC, and The Incomparables. To Melissa Reynolds, who taught me how to try, succeed, and fail at scary things. To Larry Ivy, who brought me as an intern on the great adventure that planted the seed for this book.
To Ceva Jill Story & Michael Moore for being my ride or dies.
To the big Guinevere team: the artists who made this book beautiful—Niall Grant, Aftyn Shah, Chaim Holtjer, and Paige Dainty, to Andrew and the Merrick Books community, Mackenzie Walton, Taryn Fagerness, who did the most in getting this book out in the wide world, Julia Whelan, who saw me on the internet, took a chance on my manuscript, and leant Vera her voice, Geof Prysirr, whose artistic precision in audio editing is even more impressive than his grilling prowess (which is saying quite a lot), the Hodderscape team, and finally to Alex Sunshine (the editor with the single greatest name) and the many good folks at Kensington for inviting Vera’s story and me into a whole new world of opportunities.
To so many authors who lowered ladders and pulled me up, and last, but certainly not least: to the remarkable book communities of Instagram and TikTok, who gave me the courage to take wild leaps.
Discussion Questions
These suggested questions are to spark conversation and enhance your reading of The Once and Future Queen.
1.Before reading, how familiar were you with stories of Camelot and Arthurian lore? Have your feelings about the legend changed? What would you like to learn more about?
2.Many locations in the book are real places: the Tor, The White Spring Temple, and the George and Pilgrims Hotel. If you were to visit one of these places, which would it be, and why?
3.Vera manages to smuggle some items to the past that make 7th century life a bit more comfortable. If you had five minutes and an Indiana Jones-style satchel, what would you bring to the 7th century?
4.Throughout the novel, new magical gifts manifest in BIG ways, surprising the characters who receive them as much as everyone who bears witness. If you could have any magical gift, what would you pick? What would you do with that power?
5.Many of our central characters have endured recent trauma, and each of them responds differently: Vera tries to fix everything on her own, Lancelot tries to protect everyone, and Arthur retreats into himself. Why do you think each reacts that way? Who do you relate to the most?
6.Historically, Queen Guinevere—and her affair with Lancelot—was often portrayed unfavorably. How does Vera’s character reinforce or challenge prominent versions of the legend? How do you think Guinevere and Lancelot’s friendship in this retelling has impacted the story?
7.Arthur and Vera find a quiet connection reading The Hobbit together. What do you think it is about reading out loud together that creates a sense of connection? How do you think stories help us better understand ourselves?
8.Vera doesn’t feel like she has much to offer, but her friends in the book would certainly disagree. What does Vera bring to her relationships in Camelot? Why do you think seeing herself as an asset is such a challenge for Vera, and how do you relate to her experience?
9.When Vera is asked to give up her life for a chance to save magic, she goes back and forth on what the right choice is. What would you have done in her shoes, and why?
10.The Once and Future Queen is the first book in a trilogy, and many questions are left unanswered. What is the biggest question you’d like answered immediately? What are your theories about what will happen next?