‘Loup has it,’ said Eric. He affected disappointment, remembering how Kiown had drooled at the sight of it back at the hilltop.
Kiown cursed. ‘That old fraud. And they all thought I was the shifty one. Oh well.’
‘Magpie-slayer, you said. How did you know about that?’
Kiown’s mouth hung open. ‘Wait wait, I was joking! As if you would have killed it, I thought. Not my timid Otherworld prince who goes pale at the sight of blood. You’re serious? You’re the one who killed it?’
‘I just hurt it. Anfen killed it.’
Kiown peered at him closely. ‘I somehow don’t think you’re lying! What a strange tale. Magpies aren’t easy to kill. Perhaps I’d better be careful of you, O Eric, inn-finder.’
‘Why should you need to be?’
‘Extremely good point. You understand this means you’re Marked? Don’t worry. We are probably too far south for them, approaching country where people think they don’t even exist. I suppose we had better trade stories. Who goes first?’
‘You, please.’
‘Very well. After the company split, we got wiped out half a day south-west of Faul’s place. We stuck to the road, which was, in retrospect, most unwise. As if the patrols will range this wide, I thought to myself. Sure enough, patrol found us, took us out in a mountain pass just like the one near the hilltop. I fled like a coward. Wise coward, however. I was supposed to be in charge, and I did yell “flee”. But they had battle fever.’ He sighed, face downcast. Eric, however, found that most emotions Kiown expressed — apart from anger — rang faintly theatrical, as though he performed them for his own delight like someone before a mirror. He said in a lowered voice, ‘All was lost and there was no way through. Heavy infantry blocked the road with archers behind them. They fired at Doon, which made him pissed. You seen heavy infantry? There were none at the hilltop. Armour, big heavy armour. Their job on a battlefield is pretty much to get in the way. Almost too weighed down to be dangerous, but you sure as fuck can’t kill em. Guess what Doon did?’
‘No idea.’
‘Killed em. You remember our friend the half-giant? Stomped through em all, knocked em scattering. Not pretty to watch. One poor clod, Doon slammed down a foot on his chest, and blood gushed out the visor of his helm. That’s what it means, to be stomped by Doon. But the archers in the back, they just kept filling him with arrows. Rest of us too. Arrow stuck me like a fork into mutton. See?’ Kiown lifted a sleeve of his shirt, where thick bandages showed old blood.
‘You should probably change that dressing.’
‘I’m kind of proud of the blood, to be honest. Looks good for the ladies. Lucky the arrow ricocheted off someone else and hit me weak. Serrated arrows! Ouch. I cried, honestly cried.’
‘Then what? You caught up with Anfen and he sent you to find us?’
‘Patience, patience. Even after Doon trampled half their infantry, there was no way to reach the archers behind em. So what’d I do? I fled. Say what you will. The others kept trying to get at the archers, even after I yelled retreat. Idiots. And when Doon gets in that mood, he sure doesn’t take orders. But he was only ever going to make a dent in them before they got him. Just a few too many foes, this time.’
‘What happened to him in the end?’
Kiown sighed. ‘Last time I looked back, he was busy stomping his way to happiness. But they sure had a lot of arrows in him by then. A lot. And they were drawing back those shitty little standard-issue crossbows to fire another round.’ Kiown was quiet for a moment, staring out the window. ‘No other way to go but through that mountain pass. Somewhere along the way, they knew we were coming, and knew to wait there. Anfen shouldn’t have split us up, if I may be ever so briefly critical of His Perfection.’ He sighed and was quiet for a while. ‘Such is war. Valour return him. Now. Your turn.’
Eric told Kiown what had happened, though he didn’t mention the gun.
‘Mmm, I see,’ said Kiown when Eric had finished. ‘Or I think so. I guessed Anfen would be at Faul’s still, waiting for the patrols to die down. I’d hoped to come back and meet you all, but just missed you. I did not know the woods I travelled through were full of monsters, however. Inferno cultists, yes, and ghosts. Not monsters.’
‘How was it at Faul’s, when you arrived?’
‘Faul was pissed,’ said Kiown, shrugging. ‘And that is not nice to behold. Worse than Doon almost, with those big teeth of hers. It was not time to impart grim news of her nephew. She chased me away as it was. She never liked me much. But I saw the magpie’s body, and went “aha!” inside. She was digging a grave for it, her and that weird husband of hers dressed in mourning garb and everything. That pair are funny in the skull — it’s a magpie, I mean come on. I bet they didn’t even loot it for trinkets. She wouldn’t say which way you’d all gone. I had to guess from tracks but they were hard to read. Guess I followed yours, not Anfen’s.’
‘Lucky you found us here,’ said Eric, wondering at the source of the apprehension he suddenly felt. Was it the feeling of being captive again — ‘property’ of Anfen’s band?
Kiown shrugged. ‘Only lucky I decided to stay at this inn, rather than camp off road. I was always going to travel the same way you had. Basically one road leads past Faul’s, from River City through to Hane. These inns are the only place for a long way to spend the night under a roof. It has been a long while since I had a bed. On the off-chance, I asked the girl downstairs if any strangers had passed through. Didn’t expect her to say yes. For a coin, she described you. Didn’t ask her what she’d do for ten coins, but I bet it’s coin well spent, with that pretty mouth of hers. Mmmm. She found you most peculiar indeed. You also scared off their only other two customers, Nightmare cultists. If you can scare Nightmare cultists, you have done well.’
‘Hane is a city, I take it.’
The cone of red hair bobbed to and fro. ‘Aligned. Pretty newly Aligned, so it’s freer than the others, but getting worse. We may be able to get in and out, still. Most people aren’t able to leave, but I got contacts there … or I did. Been a while since I was there. We’ll scout it out. In a way, it’s good we’re not with Anfen. We’d be a lot less free to travel if we were. They’re putting up road signs with his likeness, and posting rewards. Serious business!’
And no thanks to you, right? But you seem cheerful enough, Eric thought. Aloud, he said, ‘Where are we headed, then? You’re our guide, it’d seem.’
‘And I work cheap! We’ll meet Anfen. He’s off to the council of Free Cities over in Elvury. We’ll stop in Hane, grab supplies and get you some more normal-looking clothes, so you don’t stand out so much.’ Kiown stood. ‘The girl downstairs said you paid with a red scale! Tut tut, what a waste. But believe me, that’ll cover our breakfast, and they can serve it with a song and a kiss, for what you’ve put in their safe. Where’s your grandpa?’
The door creaked open. ‘He’s right here,’ said Case, his footsteps padding in. ‘And he didn’t piss the bed.’
‘Then we shall celebrate,’ said Kiown.
Downstairs they had eggs and sausage, the innkeeper stacking food high on their plates, apparently mindful he’d been hugely overpaid for the room. ‘Don’t believe him either,’ Kiown muttered. ‘He’s got plenty of gold in the safe for an exchange. No matter. I’ll be back through here and I’ll rob the bastard. I’ve robbed this place before.’
‘Got away with it?’ said Case, who sat hidden by the charm necklace.
‘Sure did. They thought their help had done it. Hanged someone for it. I didn’t mean that. Dragon’s will, eh?’ He laughed. ‘Got a tidy sum of gold, even pissed in their ale barrel. Customers commented on the tang and drank it down in record time.’ Kiown downed his cup of mead in one long pull, spilling much down his shirt, then slammed it down, screaming obscenely across the room for another.