First Impressions
Let’s look at the traits for psychopaths. These are indicators that are more or less visible. In some cases you have to get close to see them. Often when you do see them, Mallory is already chewing on you.
The traits may seem inconsistent, and shift over time. Remember you are watching an actor who manipulates everyone he talks to. Even if he doesn’t see you watching him, he’s careful and paranoid. He always assumes eyes are on him.
Mallory’s first impression comes from his need to hide in plain sight. He has to attract potential targets, and discourage critical analysis:
❂ Mallory is charming and eloquent. He can make anyone like him. He smiles a lot and maintains eye contact. He uses dominant body language. He is well-groomed and stays in good physical shape.
❂ He’s narcissistic and colorful. He dresses well in any public situation. He always stands out, better dressed and more distinctive than others. He’s hungry for money and power, and important people. He takes many photos of himself and enjoys showing these to others.
❂ He has no startle response and no fear of authority. He is happy to interrupt people, take control of conversations and meetings. He shows no fear in talking to strangers. He ignores social mores without anxiety.
❂ He is great with languages. He talks without an accent, and can blend in with any crowd. He is an excellent mimic. He can do dramatic facial expressions and body language.
❂ He likes telling stories, and making people laugh. He laughs a lot. Yet he has a juvenile sense of humor and does not get others' jokes. He always wants to dominate the group. If someone challenges him in this, he asserts dominance with force.
❂ He makes friends without stress or difficulty. His behavior and body language with new acquaintances says "we are old friends." People who meet him seem to adore him and often ask after him. This effect lasts for years.
❂ He enjoys the nightlife and you may well meet him over a drink. He can drink a lot, yet does not lose control. If he uses drugs, they do not affect him much. He likes to encourage those around him to drink and use drugs.
Second Impressions
If Mallory decides you are an interesting prospect, you may see a new set of traits. I explained many of these in The Hunt and Attack and Capture. It’s worth listing them again:
❂ Mallory shows a quiet yet dramatic vulnerability. She may have injuries, or difficulties with her family. She talks about this without shame or fear. You find these vulnerabilities attractive, even compelling. She may even tell you, "only you can save me."
❂ She likes using dominant body language on you. She touches your arm and shoulder all the time. She gives you long gazes. She interrupts you, while laughing. It seems friendly, yet it is insistent and one-sided.
❂ She texts and chats with you often. That can be hundreds of times in a day. She initiates conversations, and controls their direction. She often uses sexual and provocative language. She flatters you and makes you feel wanted.
❂ She introduces you to few or no old friends. She may be new to the place. If she has friends they are all recent. She does not talk of her past in a positive way. She has a lot of time for you, for someone so charming and sociable.
❂ She has few long term accomplishments. She may lie about her credentials and achievements. If you search Google you won’t find a solid body of work. She may be using a false name.
❂ She brings sex into the relationship early, if it’s an option. She offers this without pause, and is even aggressive about it. If you refuse, she turns angry and accusatory.
❂ She does not respect your existing relationships. If you’re talking to her, she assumes you are willing to take it further. She is not concerned with others who may suffer in the process. She does not apologize for crossing social boundaries.
❂ She shows fits of explosive anger, with you and with others. She provokes arguments and fights. She seems to enjoy these episodes. It often happens after you are most intimate. They leave you shaken and shocked.
❂ She acts with casual rudeness and disdain towards people who she considers unimportant. This will include anyone serving her in a restaurant. She likes it when people serve her.
Third Impressions
If you start a close relationship with Mallory, you may see better-hidden traits. Though they may emerge only late in your relationship. I already explained some of these in The Feeding:
❂ Mallory likes to hear stories about other people. Yet he seems oblivious to their emotional needs. He never asks how you are doing, meaning it. If you ask him how someone else is doing, he gives a bland, generic answer. He does not know, or he does not care.
❂ He texts and chats with a lot of people. Most are unknown to you. You do not see this behavior unless he slips up. He changes his phones often, and hides his browsing activity. If you do spy on him you find a lot of disturbing discussions about sex.
❂ He cheats, a lot, and with a long line of different people. It varies from one-night stands to year-long affairs. He may be bisexual, yet denies this outright if you ask him. He uses his trips away from home as his main cover. Few of the people he sleeps with know he is married. Often they know little about his true life.
❂ He has a family history of strangeness and criminality. This is a well-hidden family secret and emerges only over time. He has a parent who is a lot like him. The other was quiet and unhappy. He has a brother or sister who is in psychiatric care. He has uncles or cousins with personality disorders. There may be suicide in the family.
❂ His relationships with you and others revolve around argument and conflict. He may not speak to family members for a year at a time. He argues with you at the slightest excuse. Every argument becomes a crisis. It is never his fault. He never says sorry.
❂ He is a compulsive and eloquent liar. You struggle to see this. His lies are rich and omnipresent. You think him the most sincere and honest person, for years. When you catch him lying it is like decoding an optical illusion. The shattering of this particular illusion leaves you stunned for weeks.
❂ He is paranoid and often accuses you of plotting what he in fact would do. He accuses you of cheating. Of planning to abandon him. Of giving him STDs. Of lying to you, taking his money, sleeping with your ex. If you make a note of all his accusations, it adds up to an accurate confession.
❂ He fakes his emotions. You can only see this when he switches off a mask. His sudden anger feels real and explosive to you, and is terrifying. When he flips from anger to calm, you may see the fraud. Honest anger does not disappear so fast. The same for affection, jealousy, self-pity. His real emotions are predatory, and alien to you. You do not get to see this personality though.
❂ He is a compulsive rule breaker. He collects traffic violations. He is slow to pay his debts. He accumulates a police record. He appears in court, before judges. Yet he always seems to escape serious consequences. His record is clean. You see nothing of this, unless he slips up.
❂ He prefers nights to mornings. He sleeps less than most people, and can go for weeks with poor sleep. When he sleeps, noise does not wake him. If he dreams of a chase sequence, he is the hunter, not the hider. He does not dream of monsters.