“I’m serious.”
“Yeah.”
“Okay, because I just need you to-”
“Don’t overdo it,” she said. “It’ll get weird.”
“Right.”
“I’m just… I’m glad you’re still here.”
“That makes two of us.”
“But I have to say, jumping into a river in subzero weather? That is way off the screen. Even for you.” Her gaze drifted toward my feet. “So, frostbite?” she said uneasily. “Any toes missing or anything?”
“Still intact.”
“Good. ’Cause that would have totally creeped me out.”
Pat, you need to get going.
I turned to Sean. “Thanks for bringing her over.”
“No problem. It’s good to see you on your feet.” He handed me a bundle of manila envelopes. “The papers you gave me yesterday at the sawmill.”
Donnie’s personnel files and time cards. “I appreciate it.”
A second passed.
How to do this.
I turned to Tessa again. “Listen, I’m really glad to see you, but-”
“I said that’s enough.” She spoke softly, and I noticed that she was eyeing the young man working behind the counter. I hadn’t really noticed before, but he was in his midtwenties, with ruffled hair, dark, deep-set eyes, and a cute, sly sort of grin. He’d been checking her out too and abruptly averted eye contact when he saw me look at him.
Tessa always goes for the older guys and doesn’t always show prudence when it comes to vetting dates, boyfriends, on-the-spot crushes.
“Come here.” I led her to the room beside the lobby, and when we were alone and the guy at the counter was out of sight and wouldn’t distract her, I said, “I need to go somewhere for a little bit. It’s very important, but I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
She looked at me quizzically. “I just got here and-by the way, were you limping just now?”
“Yes.”
“What happened?”
“I turned my ankle a little yesterday. It’s no big deal. So, I’m just saying-”
“You’re leaving.”
“Yes. This isn’t about us. This is-this was from before.”
“Then why did I even come?” She didn’t sound angry, just confused. “Why’d I have to go and ride a snowmobile all the way over here in this weather if you were just gonna leave as soon as I got here?”
Obviously I hadn’t even known she was on her way, but that wasn’t really something I needed to point out at the moment.
“I’ll be back as soon as I can,” I repeated. The words were true enough, but I was also aware that if I did head out with Alexei to look for the Pickron killers, I might be gone for hours.
“This has to do with the case?”
“Yes.”
She scrutinized me. “Agent Vanderveld’s here, right? So have him check it out.” She knew I’d been working with Jake on the Reiser case in Merrill, so it wasn’t a master feat of deduction to guess that he was here.
“This time it has to be me.”
“Why?”
“It’s complicated.”
“Really.” Ice had crept into her voice, and I was getting disoriented by our conversation’s penduluming swing of emotions. “Just a minute ago you were telling me how glad you were to see me and now you’re just taking off.”
“This doesn’t have to do with you.”
“Oh. I see.”
“Tessa-”
“You almost died and I would have been alone.”
“I wish I could stay here, right now, with you, but I have to-look, we’ll talk through everything later, okay?”
She started for the lobby. “Right.”
“Hang on a sec.”
She spun. “What? I just agreed with you.”
“Trust me on this. Okay?”
“Trust you?”
“You can stay here with Sean and Amber.”
“End of discussion, right? Is that it?”
“Don’t be like this, Tessa.”
She turned on her heels and swept out of the room, and I followed, ready to confront her again, but then I saw that Lien-hua had entered the lobby. Her eyes flicked from Tessa to me to Tessa.
“Hey, Tessa,” she said.
“Lien-hua. I didn’t know you were here.”
“You okay?”
“Yeah.” Tessa strode to the far side of the lobby and then stared, arms folded, out the window. The guy behind the counter looked toward her, then glanced my way and quickly went back to texting someone on his iPhone.
Oh, boy.
Salvage this and then get out of here.
Sean and Lien-hua said nothing, and I realized they’d never met. I quickly introduced them. “Sean, this is Lien-hua; Lien-hua, Sean.” They shook hands amiably, but their attention was obviously still on me and Tessa.
“Sean,” I said, “I need to borrow your sled.”
“It’s Amber’s,” he told me needlessly.
“Right.”
He must have been able to tell I was anxious to leave because he didn’t argue, just handed me his helmet. “Nothing impulsive, okay? It’s the only snowmobile we have left.”
“I promise.”
I gave Lien-hua the personnel files and time cards that Sean had brought with him. “Take a close look at the date Donnie started working at the sawmill,” I said. “And check to see if and when he clocked out on the day of the murders and if he received any phone calls that day at the mill prior to leaving.”
When I mentioned the phone calls, Sean reached into his pocket. “Oh yeah. Almost forgot.”
He passed my cell to me, but I realized that Alexei had Lien-hua’s number, not mine, so I would need to keep hers in case he texted me again.
I gave her my phone. “I’ll get yours back to you as soon as I can.”
“Where are you going?”
“I have an errand to run.” Then I said to Sean, “Amber’s in room 104. Can you guys keep an eye on Tessa?”
“Absolutely.”
After reading Amber’s note this morning, I wondered when she was going to tell Sean about leaving him. I hoped she’d have the good sense to wait until Tessa and I were out of town.
Go, Pat. You need to move.
“I have to go, Raven,” I called. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
She was quiet.
“Tessa.”
She didn’t turn. “Sure.”
Wonderful.
“Lien-hua.” I motioned toward the door. “Can you come here a sec?”
We stepped outside, and I held out my hand. “I need your gun.”
“What’s going on here?”
“Mine’s in a snowbank by the Chippewa-”
“That’s not what I mean.”
“I can’t-”
Her hands went to her hips. “Are you going to the ELF site by yourself?”
“No, it’s just… Please…” For the second time in two minutes I said it: “You have to trust me.”
“Trust you.”
“Yes. You trust me, don’t you?”
The hesitation in her reply made me think of last night when she’d walked in on me and Amber, but then she took off her holster and her Glock and handed them to me. “Be careful and call me if you need me. Don’t shut me out.”
“That’s the last thing I’d ever want to do.”
I wanted so badly to hold her, feel her arms encircling me, gain strength from her embrace, the scent of her presence, but I knew things were still tenuous between us. Instead, I placed my hand gently on her arm. “You’re the person who matters more to me than anyone else.” As I said the words I realized they were true to an extent I’d never even been aware of before. Yes, I cared fiercely for Tessa, loved her in a protective, parental way, but with Lien-hua I had to acknowledge that my feelings were the deepest, most intimate kind. “You know that, right?”
“Yes.” The answer didn’t come as promptly as I would’ve hoped, but there was no uncertainty in it.
After a moment’s debate I gave her a light kiss on the cheek and whispered, “I love you.”
“You too,” she said softly.
And in her words I found a shot of courage and a renewed sense of hope that we were going to work things out after all.
She turned and went back into the lobby, and as the door opened I heard Jake’s voice. “Where’s he going?”
“Out,” she answered.
Then it swung shut, and I limped down the path to the snowmobile to go meet Alexei Chekov in the basement of the hospital I’d been in yesterday, recovering from trying to save the man he’d thrown into the Chippewa River.