“Don’t be afraid.” His uncle’s voice came to him through the darkness. “Concentrate.”
The disciplined training in magic came to Palin’s aid. Thus was he forced to concentrate on the words to a spell. Closing his eyes, the young man shut everything out—his fear, his horror, his sorrow—and envisioned the portal in his mind, standing directly before him.
“Excellent, young one,” came Raistlin’s soft voice.
Palin blinked, startled. The portal was right where he had envisioned it, just a step or two away.
“Don’t hesitate,” Raistlin instructed, reading the young man’s mind. “The way back is not difficult, not like coming through. Go ahead. I can stand on my own. I will follow....”
Palin stepped inside, feeling a slight sensation of dizziness and a momentary blindness, but it passed quickly. Looking around, he drew a deep breath of relief and thankfulness. He was standing in the laboratory once more. The portal was behind him, though he had no clear remembrance of how he walked through it, and beside the portal he saw his uncle. But Raistlin was not looking at him. His eyes were on the portal itself, a strange smile played on his thin lips.
“You are right! We must close it!” Palin said suddenly, thinking he knew his uncle’s mind. “The queen will come back info the world—”
Raising the staff, the young man stepped forward. A slender, golden-skinned hand closed over his arm. Its grip hurt; the touch burned him.
Catching his breath, biting his lip from the pain, Palin looked at his uncle in confusion.
“All in good time, my dear nephew,” whispered Raistlin, “all in good time...."
Chapter Nine
Raistlin drew the young man nearer, smiling slightly as Palin flinched, noting the look of pain in the green eyes. Still Raistlin held him, regarding him searchingly, studying the features, probing the depths of his soul.
“There is much of myself in you, young one,” Raistlin said, reaching up to brush back a lock of hair that had fallen across Palin’s pale face. “More of me than of your father. And he loves you best for that, doesn’t he? Oh, he is proud of your brothers”—Raistlin shrugged, as the young man started to protest—“but you he cherishes, protects....”
Flushing, Palin broke free of Raistlin’s grip. But he might have spared his energy. The archmage held him fast—with his eyes, not his hands.
“He’ll smother you!” Raistlin hissed. “Smother you as he did me! He will prevent you from taking the Test. You know that, don’t you?”
“He—he doesn’t understand,” Palin faltered. “He’s only trying to do what he thinks—”
“Don’t lie to me, Palin,” Raistlin said softly, placing his slender fingers on the young man’s lips. “Don’t lie to yourself. Speak the truth that is in your soul. I see it in you so clearly! The hatred, the jealousy! Use it, Palin! Use it to make you strong—as I did!”
The golden-skinned hand traced over the bones of Palin’s face—the firm, strong chin, the clenched jaw, the smooth, high cheekbones. Palin trembled at the touch, but more still at the expression in the burning, hourglass eyes. “You should have been mine! My son!” Raistlin murmured. “I would have raised you to power! What wonders I would have shown you, Palin. Upon the wings of magic we would have flown the world—cheered the winner of the fights for succession among the minotaurs, gone swimming with the sea elves, battled giants, watched the birth of a golden dragon. . . . All this could have been yours, should have been yours, Palin, if only they—”
A fit of coughing checked the archmage. Gasping, Raistlin staggered, clutching his chest. Catching hold of him in his strong arms, Palin led his uncle to a dusty, cushioned chair that stood near the portal. Beneath the dust he could discern dark splotches on the fabric—as though it had, long ago, been stained with blood. In his concern for his uncle, Palin thought little of it. Raistlin sank down into the chair, choking, coughing into a soft, white cloth that Palin drew from his own robes and handed to him. Then, leaning the staff carefully against the wall, the young man knelt beside his uncle.
“Is there something I can do? Something I can get for you? That herbal mixture you drank.” His glance went to the jars of herbs on a shelf. “If you tell me how to fix it—”
Raistlin shook his head. “In time ...” he whispered as the spasm eased. “In time, Palin.” He smiled wearily, his hand reaching out to rest on the young man’s head. “In time. I will teach you that... and so much more! How they have wasted your talent! What did they tell you, young one? Why did they bring you here?”
Palin bowed his head. The touch of those slender fingers excited him, yet he caught himself cringing, squirming beneath their burning caress. “I came—They said .. . you would try... to take...” He swallowed, unable to continued.
“Ah, yes. Of course. That is what those idiots would think. I would take your body as Fistandantilus tried to take mine. What fools! As if I would deprive the world of this young mind, of this power. The two of us ... There will be two of us, now. I make you my apprentice, Palin.” The burning fingers stroked the auburn hair.
Palin raised his face. “But,” he said in amazement, “I am of low rank. I haven’t taken the Test—”
“You will, young one,” Raistlin murmured, exhaustion plain upon his face. “You will. And with my help, you will pass easily, just as I passed with the help of another . .. Hush. Don’t speak anymore. I must rest.” Shivering, Raistlin clutched his tattered robes about his frail body. “Bring me some wine and a change of clothes, or I will freeze to death. I had forgotten how damp this place was.” Leaning his head back against the cushions, Raistlin closed his eyes, his breath rattling in his lungs.
Palin stood slowly, casting an uneasy glance behind him.
The five heads of the dragon around the portal still glowed, but their colors were faded, less brilliant. Their mouths gaped open, but no sound came out. It seemed to Palin, though, that they were waiting, biding their time. Their ten eyes, glittering with some secret, inner knowledge, watched him. He looked inside the portal. The red-tinged landscape stretched into the distance. Far away, barely discernible, he could see the wall, the pool of blood beneath it. And above it, the dark, winged shadow....
“Uncle,” Palin said, “the portal. Shouldn’t we—?”
“Palin,” said Raistlin softly, “I gave you a command. You will learn to obey my commands, apprentice. Do as I bid.”
As Palin watched, the shadow grew darker. Like a cloud covering the sun, the wings cast a chill of fear over his soul. He started to speak again, but at that moment glanced back at Raistlin.
His uncle’s eyes appeared to be closed, but Palin caught a slit of gold gleaming beneath the lids, like the eyes of a lizard. Biting his lower lip, the young man turned hastily away. He took hold of the staff, used its light to search the laboratory for that which his uncle had requested.
Dressed once more in soft black velvet robes, Raistlin stood before the portal, sipping a glass of elven wine that Palin had discovered in a carafe far back in a corner of the laboratory. The shadow over the land within had now grown so dark that it seemed night had fallen over the Abyss. But no stars shone, no moons lit that dread darkness. The wall was the only object visible, and it glowed with its own horrid light. Raistlin stared at it, his face grim, his eyes haunted by pain.
“Thus she reminds me of what will happen should she catch me, Palin," he said. “But, no, I am not going back.” Looking around, the archmage glanced at the young man. Raistlin’s eyes glittered within the depths of his black hood. “I had twenty-five years to consider my mistakes. Twenty-five years of unbearable agony, of endless torment.... My only joy, the only thing that gave me strength to meet each morning’s torture was the shadow of you I saw in my mind. Yes, Palin”—smiling, Raistlin reached out and drew the young man nearer—“I have watched you all these years. I have done what I could for you. There is a strength—an inner strength—in you that comes from me! A burning desire, a love for the magic! I knew, one day, you would seek me out to learn how to use it. I knew they would try to stop you. But they could not. Everything they did to prevent your coming must only bring you closer. Once in here, I knew you would hear my voice. You would free me. And so I made my plans ...”