I lean back against the legs of one of the stone fae. It’s a beautiful day. The sun is just now beginning its descent from the bright blue sky. Without Naito screaming, it’s quiet. If I keep my gaze away from the bloodstains, it’s peaceful even. There’s something very wrong about that. A day like this should be filled with darkness. It should be filled with clouds and the threat of violent weather.
“McKenzie.”
Lorn stands a few paces away. I’ve never seen him look so disheveled. His white shirt is wrinkled and dingy, his shoulders are slumped, and his silver eyes seem darker, duller, than normal.
My throat closes up. It did the same thing earlier when Lord Raen found me. I couldn’t say anything then, but I didn’t have to. Kelia’s father took one look at my face and paled. Tears blurred my eyes. By the time my vision cleared, he was gone.
Lorn sits beside me.
“I hired fae to protect her,” he says.
I look at him, but he’s staring at the floor.
“I haven’t heard from them,” he continues. “I assume they entered the ether before she did.”
“It was chaotic.”
There’s something pensive in his soft hmm. We sit in companionable silence for a while. Then a stream of curses comes from nearby. Naito again.
Lorn looks in the direction of the subsequent crash. His Adam’s apple bobs once before he thins his lips and straightens his shoulders.
“That must end,” he says, almost sounding like his normal self. Almost.
He stands, starts to take a step away, but a flash of light cuts through the air. The Court fae is in this world for all of a half second before three arrows pierce his chest. I watch, not even flinching, as his soul-shadow rises into the air.
This time, Lorn’s hmm is heavy with perception. “You’re not doing well.”
“Nobody’s doing well.” Him included.
“True. But everyone else here reacted when that fissure opened. You didn’t. You would be dead if it wasn’t for the archers.” When I don’t respond, he sighs. “You’re not going to recover here. You should go back to your world.”
“I’m fine,” I say.
“You just pointed out nobody is fine. If you’re staying for them, you shouldn’t. Seeing you like this will not cheer either of them up.”
“If a fae uses illusion—”
“By the time you reacted, your warning would be far too late.” He shrugs. “Do what you will, but if you do decide to take my advice, I can have a fae fissure you to a safe place.”
“I’m fine,” I say again. If I keep repeating it to myself, maybe one day it will be true.
IN the end, Lena orders me to go back to Earth. She claims she wants me fresh and alert in case the remnants of the Court fae launch an organized attack. I don’t want to admit it, but she and Lorn are both right. Being back in my world helps some. I can almost pretend I’m normal, that I know nothing of the Realm and the fae and the war that has taken too many lives. Almost.
I switch off the television. The channel has been running the same story over and over again even though the Canadian authorities have no new information about what happened in Lynn Valley. Half a neighborhood caught fire—so did a portion of the forest behind it—and three humans died. The thing that perplexes the investigators the most is that the residents in four of the homes are missing. They can’t find the tor’um despite the fact that some of the neighbors are certain they were there when the blaze erupted.
I hate that the fae’s war spilled over into my world. A month ago, I would have sworn if that happened, it would be the rebels’ fault, but they were careful when they abducted me from campus. Aren didn’t allow his people to use magic that would be visible to humans, and he made sure they were careful when they aimed their bows—every arrow the rebels fired hit either a fae or a fissure. The Court fae weren’t as cautious, and the Canadian authorities don’t know what to make of the half dozen arrows they found during their investigation.
I rise off the couch. I’m staying in a suite in Las Vegas. Apparently, this is Lorn’s idea of a safe place. With all the tech infused throughout the city, he’s probably right. No fae is going to want to stay here more than a few minutes.
I’m heading for one of the three bedrooms, determined to sleep for more than two hours this time, when my skin tingles. I feel him, a familiar warmth I’ll never be able to forget.
“How are you?” Kyol asks.
I don’t know why his question brings on the tears—I haven’t cried since I saw Lord Raen—but my chin quivers and the dam I built to hold back my emotions shatters completely. I spin toward him and then throw my arms around his neck. His arms tighten around me, and he holds me like nothing has changed.
Everything’s changed. Nothing will ever be the same between us.
“Kaesha.”
I lay my head against his chest, hear his heart thumping. Somehow, it manages to sound heavy and broken. Or maybe that’s my heart.
“You’re okay,” I say.
“Yes.” He smoothes a hand over my hair. “Lena’s had me speaking with the province elders.”
“Will they support her?” I ask.
“Some might.”
His words are a whisper, and I know this isn’t the conversation we should be having right now. I have things I need to say, things I need to tell him.
“Kyol—”
“Shh,” he says. “I know.” He draws in a breath and takes a step back to look at me. “I wish . . . I wish things had turned out differently. I wish I hadn’t been such a fool.”
“But—”
“No. It’s okay. I understand why you’re leaving me. You’ve made the right decision. I’ve made so many wrong ones.”
The pain and regret in his voice kill me. I don’t say anything because I can’t. My throat burns too much. If there was a way to do this without hurting him, I would. He’s my protector, my first love, my best friend. He’s the one person in my life who’s always understood me, but what I said in Naito’s backyard is true: I never should have had to wait ten years for him. I should have respected myself more than that, known I deserved to be treated better. I should have demanded to be treated better. Maybe if I had, he would have given in. We would be together. But I was a coward. I never gave him an ultimatum because I was afraid he’d choose his king over me.
“I should go,” Kyol says. “The remnants are still attacking the palace and Lena is . . .”
There are a number of ways I could fill in that blank, but I raise an eyebrow, waiting.
“She is reckless,” he finishes. “She insists on being part of the guard rotation. We need more fae to keep control of the palace, but it’s foolish for her to risk herself.” He draws in a breath. “I just needed to make sure you were okay before I speak to her again.”
“I’m fine,” I say, but tears pool in my eyes. I try to hide them, but Kyol sees. He takes me into his arms again. I should push him away because I don’t want to make this good-bye any harder. I’ll see him again, but we won’t be like this. We’ll be . . . just friends. Acquaintances. Colleagues.
A sharp shrrip cuts through the air. Kyol tightens his arms around me, then focuses on something over my shoulder. “If Jorreb hurts you, I’ll kill him.”
He kisses my hand, lets his lips linger, drinking in my chaos lusters one last time. Then he steps back, lettings my fingers slip through his as he opens a fissure. A moment later, he’s gone.
Before I turn, I wipe the tears from my cheeks.