My words make him flinch, and he retreats a step. I pursue him, my rage increasing, not decreasing. “Everything I feel for you now is manipulated by magic. I won’t give in to it. Even if Aren dies.”
My voice cracks over the last word.
“I know,” Kyol says. “I know!”
“I’ll talk to Hison. I’ll tell him . . .” I can’t tell Hison the truth. As angry as I am at Kyol, I won’t let him die either.
Kyol grabs both my wrists, backs me up against the wall. “I’m sorry, McKenzie. Sidhe, I’m sorry.” He drops his gaze to the floor, shakes his head slowly. “I’d tell the high nobles the truth if it wouldn’t kill you.”
My chaos lusters leap from my skin to his. We’re touching, so they’re hot and potent, but my eyes pool with tears.
“It would kill you,” he says softly. Then he swallows and meets my gaze. “The other human-fae life-bonds . . . They all ended the same. When either person died, so did the other. That’s why he’s doing this, McKenzie. He’s sacrificing himself to save you, not me.”
It takes several heartbeats for his words to sink in, but I shake my head in disbelief. That can’t be true. Lorn survived Kelia’s death. I’ve seen other fae survive the deaths of their bond-mates as well. I’ve never heard of both dying.
But, God, what if it is true? Lena told me life-bonds between human and fae always ended badly, and when Aren learned about our connection, he said the only reason he didn’t kill Kyol on the spot was because it would kill me. I thought he meant that figuratively.
“If I die, McKenzie,” Kyol continues, “you die. And if you die, I will. I’m sorry. I’m deeply sorry for every time I’ve hurt you.”
“You’re hurting me now,” I say. The words are true on so many levels. He’s touching me, so his emotions, his pain and angst, move freely into me. So does his resolve. I can feel it solidifying in him. I can feel Aren slipping further and further away.
“I know.” He closes his eyes and swallows. He wants so much to pull me into his arms and comfort me.
“You’re not going to help me save him,” I whisper because I need to hear him say it out loud.
“No,” he says. “And I’m to tell you that, if you try to free him on your own, he won’t go. He’s doing what he thinks is the right thing for you. You never should have been caught up in this war.”
I don’t know if those last words are his or Aren’s. It doesn’t matter. Fury builds under my skin, threatening to kindle the breath I draw in. Kyol knows how close to exploding I am. I feel his misery, but nothing I say or do will change his mind because he thinks Aren’s doing the right thing, and he thinks it’s his duty to make sure it happens.
I bite my lower lip and taste blood. Screw them both. They’re not making this decision for me. Aren’s an idiot to think I’ll let us end like this. We won’t. I’ll free him myself if I have to.
“I’ll stop you,” Kyol says softly.
I meet his gaze, see the regret in his stormy eyes. I’ve never felt so betrayed.
TWENTY-THREE
I WATCH LEE drop three white tablets into a bottle of cabus. After they disappear into the crimson liquid, Lee stuffs the cork back into the top, then shakes the bottle to dissolve the pills.
“Are you sure it won’t hurt him?” I ask.
“I’m sure,” Lee says. “Dad used them all the time on fae. They were fine.”
I glance at Naito, who’s sitting on a padded bench. He gives me a curt nod.
“It’ll take ten to twenty minutes to work, depending on how much he drinks, but it’ll knock him out for around six hours,” Lee says, handing me the bottle. I nearly drop it.
“Six hours? I don’t need more than one or two.”
Lee shrugs. “You’re the one who wanted to drug him.”
His nonchalance annoys me. I’m furious at Kyol, but I don’t want to harm him. Lee, though? He doesn’t care about him at all. He doesn’t care about any of the fae. Both he and Naito were raised to hate them, and while Naito’s completely shaken off that brainwashing, his brother hasn’t. He still doesn’t trust the fae.
Lee lets out a sigh. “I promise he’ll be fine.”
I have to accept him at his word.
I turn to Naito. “I can’t give this to Kyol. He’ll know I’ve done something to it.”
“You should be able to hide your emotions better,” Naito says, standing. “I’ll make sure he gets it. Here, you’ll need this.” He takes the bottle, then places a gun in my hand. It’s not as heavy as the firearms I’ve held before, but a similar feeling of discomfort moves through me when I tighten my hand around the metal grip. The barrel of the gun looks odd, most likely because bullets aren’t fired from it. Specially made darts are.
“How does it work?” I ask.
“You pull the trigger,” Lee says.
I roll my eyes at him. “How does the tranquilizer work? Will the fae go down immediately?”
“They’ll be disoriented immediately. Most lose consciousness within twenty seconds.”
“And if they don’t?”
“Shoot them again,” he says. “Then give them one of these if you want them to live.”
He hands me a thin black case. Inside are twelve syringes prefilled with a pale yellow liquid.
“What does this do?” I ask.
“It’s adrenaline and some other drugs. It acts like an antidote. The tranquilizer will screw with their circulatory system. If they don’t get this, they’ll go into cardiac arrest.”
Fantastic.
“What about Kyol?”
Lee shakes his head. “We’re giving him a sedative. It takes longer to work, but it doesn’t have the same side effect.”
“I’ll be with you most of the time,” Naito says. “I’ll make sure they’re okay.”
I just nod and slip the gun into my backpack with my other supplies. Tranquilizing the fae is the best option we have. As much as I dislike Hison, he’s not exactly an enemy. Neither are the people who work for him. I don’t want to hurt or kill them, but I won’t let them hurt or kill Aren either. I’m going to get him out of the palace, make sure he makes it to the other side of the silver wall, then he’s going to fissure back to my world.
After that, Lena will hunt him down. She doesn’t know this yet—Naito and I haven’t told her our plan—but we have to make sure she isn’t blamed for this. We’ll fake Aren’s death, then, after a few months, he can return to the Realm. Not to Corrist, of course, but there are plenty of places to go where people won’t recognize his face.
Half an hour later, the wooziness hits Kyol. I lean against the wall, focusing on a crack in the mortar between two gray bricks to make sure my world stays steady. Kyol’s up and moving still, and he’s pissed. I can feel his focus shift to me—there’s no doubt in his mind I’m behind this—then his emotions dim suddenly. I can picture him hitting his knees, see him brace a hand against the floor, struggling to stay awake, to fight the drugs running through his system. Within minutes, he’s unconscious.
I clench my teeth together, refusing to feel guilty for something I’ve been forced to do.
Dragging my backpack across the table, I sit in a chair to wait. Lena is supposed to be meeting with the high nobles in a couple of hours. Naito’s going to keep an eye out for Hison, and when he arrives, Naito will meet me in the servants’ corridor that leads to the high nobles’ offices. I’m certain that’s where I felt Kyol stop earlier when he talked to Aren. Since we’re within Corrist’s silver walls, all the nobles have only minimal security here. We expect Hison will have more because of his prisoner, but Naito and I should be able to take care of all of them with our tranq guns.
Lee loaned me his cell phone, and Naito has his. They obviously don’t get reception here, but they keep track of Earth’s time, which is what we’re going by. I wait impatiently for the hours to pass, and try to picture this plan working, not failing. But I’m sick with worry, and every time I close my eyes, I see Aren’s execution. The fae behead kingkillers. It’s considered a cruel and dishonorable death because it’s the only way to prevent the fae from crossing to the ether, the fae equivalent of heaven. I can’t let Aren die, especially not like that.