‘That would be in Samarkand, I’d think,’ Nicander recalled. ‘But it wasn’t as you’d say a good meal, we being so distracted. I think it would have to be that funny little place in Osh.’
‘The goat was revolting!’ Tai Yi replied quickly. ‘Not fit for a lady. No – it was over the mountains in Kashgar, at the caravanserai when we arrived.’
‘That rice muck?’ Marius spluttered. ‘Queer idea of filling a man’s belly, that crew!’
‘Well, it has to be Khotan,’ Nicander said with feeling. ‘Out of the desert and fit to die – and a meal of melon slices and thin-cut mutton. That’s to remember all my life!’
It was carried unanimously and they drank to Khotan.
‘I’m really going to miss us being together like this,’ Ying Mei said quietly. ‘We’ve seen so much and…’
A hush spread, each deep in their own thoughts.
Tai Yi was the first to speak. ‘Well, we’ll be going our different ways when we reach Constantinople. You two will be returning to your monastery, Ying Mei and I will have to find somewhere and-’
‘Hey, now! We’ll be seeing each other at times, won’t we?’ Marius growled.
‘I really don’t think it possible,’ Tai Yi said with a slight edge to her voice. ‘Lady Kuo will be setting up her residence and as you are both holy men it would be unseemly to be seen too often in our company, I believe – however much we’d wish it, that is.’
Nicander couldn’t catch Ying Mei’s eye. ‘It’s been a great adventure – don’t you think so?’ he said to the table in general.
‘No one will forget it,’ Ying Mei said wistfully. ‘It’s all over now.’
Trying to rescue the mood, Nicander turned to Tai Yi. ‘What do you remember most about it?’
She frowned. ‘Why, I suppose when we left the imperial court in a hurry and my heart sank so, that we were to be going with a pair of barbarian clowns for company.’
‘You still have them!’
‘Ah, this is true. Perhaps I’ll change my mind. Is it too late to say I’m sorry for calling you kuei lao then, even if you really are foreign devils?’
Nicander laughed. ‘Forgiven! And you, Ying Mei? What do you remember?’
‘I think it must be that time we were hit by the sandstorm and you had to pull me out.’
There was a general murmuring of sympathy for she had been all but buried alive.
‘No, it wasn’t my nearly dying, it was that when I came out in such a state I knew I couldn’t be a proper lady any more!’
Nicander led the laughter that followed.
‘Marius, tell us your memory of our great adventure.’
‘Well, I think the worst of all has to be… let me see… it was when we left the hippodrome after…’
‘No, not that,’ Nicander said hastily. ‘The ladies are not interested in chariot racing. What else was a hard time for you?’
‘That’s easy. It was playing the fool like that and all the time thinking of my marching comrades in the Pannonian legion, that if they saw me then I’d die o’ shame!’
It needed translating so the others could appreciate it and join the merriment.
‘And what about you, Ah Yung,’ Ying Mei said sweetly. ‘What do you remember?’
‘Well, it must be the one who taught me that there are many paths to understanding, that the mysteries of the earth and the heavens are never to be mastered by mortal man, but the aspiring to such is the highest purpose of the human soul.’
‘Who was it that brought you to the Tao? You never told me,’ Ying Mei said softly, her eyes wide.
‘It was… one called Dao Pa. I don’t know where he came from, or where he went, but I’ll never forget him or his words.’
Marius stirred impatiently. ‘Damn it all, this is all getting a mite too solemn for me. I want we should drink – to us! To us as came through so much together!’
CHAPTER SIXTY-THREE
Nicander stared out over the water in a deep depression. He’d not had a chance to see Ying Mei alone and the talk at the dinner before they sailed had brought something into focus that was a dire threat to their future together.
He was living a lie. This mission was not the noble one of seeking truths for the Emperor of Byzantium, it was the grubby and shameful stealing of the secret of silk from the land of her birth. And when they arrived and it was revealed that they were the perpetrators…
The very thing that had set them on their way in this venture, that had served to bring them together, would in the end be the means of destroying their love.
It was now the third day since they had left Trebizond and she had kept to her cabin. Had Tai Yi’s talk of setting up a residence swayed her? Why had she not even explained her feelings to him? Perhaps she had decided to end their relationship but was reluctant to tell him.
He had taken to seeking the very nose of the ship, the rearing curve at the stem and the solitude to be found there.
Astern, to the east, was the dawn and the blossoming day; ahead to the west, was the dying day, sunset and darkness. Was this a sign, a metaphor for his fated destiny?
Wrapped in his anxieties he didn’t hear her come up. ‘Ni K’ou – not you too! It’s really so unfair.’
He swung around.
‘You’ve been queasy with the sea? I’ve been so unwell these last three days I couldn’t face anybody. Tai Yi is still lying down, poor thing.’
‘So you weren’t…?’
‘And now I’m better – and feeling quite hungry, I have to say. How long is it to Constantinople do you think?’
She was looking so beautiful with her rosy cheeks and the light wind playing with wisps of her hair. It brought a catch to his throat.
And she was standing uncomfortably close.
‘Oh, the captain says after two more sunsets,’ Nicander tried to say matter-of-factly.
‘That’s wonderful!’ she exclaimed, then turned grave. ‘It doesn’t leave us much time to plan, does it?’
‘Plan?’ he gulped.
‘Don’t be a silly, Ni K’ou!’ she teased. ‘We’re to be wed – or had you forgotten?’
The clouds of gloom and anxiety fled. She still wanted him! Nothing else mattered!
His grip on the rail tightened as he fought an overwhelming urge to hug and kiss her – but then, like an accusing ghost of the past, came the one thing that could and did matter, the secret he had kept from her, which he could do nothing to prevent coming out in just a few days’ time.
The only choice left to him was whether she found out from others – or he told her himself.
‘Ying Mei, Callista. I think we should talk.’
She picked up that this was not to be light chit-chat and tensed. ‘If you say so, Ni K’ou.’
‘I have to tell you something. About myself. It’s only fair I reveal it now, before we’re… married.’
She said nothing, her serious expression deepening.
‘I… I’m not who you think I am. I’ve done something that I’m very ashamed of and now…’
It all came out. Their mission had not been a sacred one. They had been sent by the Emperor, true, but for a quite different purpose – the stealing from China of its most valuable secret; the idea had been his in the first place and the expedition funded on his plans.
‘They’re in our box,’ he said in a low voice. ‘Protected and sealed in a secret compartment under the holy scriptures. This is why Marius is so excited, we’re probably going to be very rich indeed. You see, before we were very poor and low people and now…’
He stopped at the confusion and bewilderment on her face. He couldn’t blame her if now…
‘Ni K’ou – I don’t understand.’
‘I’m so very sorry to have deceived you, Ying Mei.’
‘No, no, not that. What is it you are trying to tell me? I-I…’ she trailed off uncertainly, searching his face.
‘Don’t you see?’ he said. ‘We’ve stolen the secret of silk. Nobody in Byzantium knows how to make silk and now they will. It will take all the profit from China and-’
‘This is what you are telling me? That you’re a bad man because you brought silk eggs out of China?’ She looked incredulous. ‘Only this? Tell me Ni K’ou, please!’
‘Why, yes. Isn’t this an evil enough thing to do to China?’
She shook her head in disbelief then broke into a delighted smile. ‘My dear Ni K’ou, no! Never! I cannot thank you enough. You’ve given me such a precious gift – you’ve given me revenge on the beast who did all that to my father!’