Tinto trundled up the bar. “Did you hear what happened at Old King Cole’s?” he asked.
“Yes,” said Eddie. “But tell me this – where did the spaceman go?”
“Is that a trick question?” Tinto asked.
“No,” said Eddie.
“Shame,” said Tinto.
“So, do you know where the spaceman went?”
Tinto scratched at the top of his head. “Space?” he suggested. “Is that the right answer? Do I get a prize?”
“You do,” said Eddie. “You win the chance to pour Jack and me fourteen beers.”
“Fourteen?” said Tinto, and he whistled. “Was that the star prize?”
Tinto wheeled off to do the business.
Jack said, “Eddie, did you really meet a real spaceman?”
“It all depends what you mean by ‘real’.”
“No it doesn’t,” said Jack, elbowing a swell who really didn’t need elbowing.
“He was a clockwork spaceman,” said Eddie. “But who is to say whether all spacemen are clockwork?”
“He was a toy spaceman?”
“And who is to say that all spacemen aren’t toy spacemen?”
“I’d be prepared to say it, but as I don’t believe in spacemen, it hardly matters whether I say it or not.”
“So you don’t believe in the concept that there might be other worlds like ours out there somewhere and that there might be life on them?”
Jack shrugged. “Back in the town where I was brought up, there was a lot of talk about that sort of thing. Alien abductions, they were called. People would be driving their cars at night, down some deserted country road, then there’d be a really bright light and then they’d be driving their cars again, but a couple of hours would have passed and they’d have no memory of what had happened. Then this fellow started hypnotising these people and all sorts of strange stories came out about what had happened during the missing hours. That they’d been taken up into space by space aliens and experimented upon, had things poked up their bums.”
“Up their bums?”
“Apparently the space aliens do a lot of that kind of thing.”
“Why?” Eddie asked.
“I don’t know,” said Jack. “Perhaps they have a really weird sense of humour, or they are a bit pervy – who can tell with spacemen?”
“And these people were telling the truth?”
Jack shrugged. “Who can say? In my humble opinion they were all mentals.”
“So you’re not a believer?”
“No,” said Jack, “I’m not. I know what I believe in and I know what I don’t. And I don’t believe in spacemen.”
“I seem to recall,” said Eddie, “when I first met you on the first night that you arrived in Toy City, that you didn’t believe toys could walk and talk and think and live.”
“I still find that hard to believe,” said Jack.
Eddie made exasperated noises. Tinto arrived with the drinks on a tray. There were many drinks. Many more than fourteen.
“We’re three drinks short here,” said Jack.
Tinto trundled away to make up the shortfall.
Eddie chuckled once more. “You fit in quite nicely here now though, don’t you, Jack?” he said.
“I still find it hard to believe. But I know it’s true.”
“Then maybe we’ll have you believing in spacemen before it’s too late.”
“Too late?” said Jack. “Too late for what?”
“Too late to stop them,” said Eddie. “Too late for us all.”
“You’re serious about this, aren’t you?”
“As I said to Bellis, ‘If you have a better explanation.’”
Jack tucked into his share of the beers. “Spacemen,” he said and he shook his head.
“There’s no telling what’s out there,” said Eddie, “Beyond The Second Big O.”
“I’ve heard that expression used before,” said Jack. “What exactly does it mean?”
Eddie shrugged. “It’s just an expression, I suppose. I don’t know where I heard it first. It means beyond, beyond what we know, someplace other that’s different. Really different.”
“But why The Second Big O? Why not The First Big O? Why an O at all?”
“I don’t know,” said Eddie, tasting beer. “I know most things, but I don’t know that.”
“Perhaps the Toymaker would know.”
“Perhaps, but I have no inclination to ask him.” Eddie regarded his paws. “Taking my hands away. That was really mean.”
“They were rather creepy,” said Jack.
“They were not creepy! They were wonderful, Jack. I loved those hands.”
“Perhaps if you save Toy City from the alien invasion he’ll fit you with another pair.”
“Do you really think so?”
“Anything’s possible.”
“You believe that, do you?”
“Absolutely,” said Jack, raising his glass to Eddie.
“Then let’s drink to the fact that anything’s possible,” said Eddie, raising his glass between his paws. “Let’s have a toast to that anything.”
“Let’s have,” said Jack, raising his glass, too.
“To spacemen,” said Eddie. “As possible as.”
“Did I hear someone say ‘spacemen’?” said Tinto.
“Jack’s a big believer,” said Eddie.
“There was one in here earlier,” said Tinto.
“Really?” said Eddie. “How interesting.”
“Well, he wasn’t that interesting. He spent most of his time cadging drinks. But he did leave something for you.”
Eddie shook his head sadly. “You didn’t think to mention this before?” he said. “It might be important.”
“You said it was,” said Tinto.
“I just said it might be,” said Eddie.
“No,” said Tinto, “you said it might be important. And then you said it was and then you left with it.”
“Curiously,” said Eddie, “you aren’t making any sense at all.”
“When I gave it to you,” said Tinto, “you thanked me for it and you tipped me for giving it to you.”
Eddie shook his head once more. “And when did I do this?” he said.
“A few minutes ago, when you came in here before.”
“What?” said Eddie.
And Jack looked at Eddie. “A few minutes ago?” said Jack, now looking at Tinto.
“Yes,” said Tinto, now looking at Eddie. “You took the message he left for you, then you left. Then you came back in again, and here you are.”
“Message?” said Jack. “The spaceman gave Eddie a message?”
“No, he left it with me and I gave it to Eddie. Do try to pay attention.”
“What did this message say?” Eddie asked.
“Well, you read it,” said Tinto. “You must know what it said.”
“I did not read it,” said Eddie, “because I was not in here a few minutes ago.”
“It was you,” said Tinto. “I’d know a scruffbag like you anywhere.”
“Tinto,” said Jack, “Tinto, this is very important. What did this message say?”
Tinto fluttered his fingers about. “As if I would look at the contents of a secret message,” he said.
“Secret message?” said Eddie.
“That’s what it said,” said Tinto. “Top-secret message for your mismatched eyes only.”
“What did it say?” asked Jack.
“I have customers to serve,” said Tinto. “Posh customers. I have no time to shilly-shally with hobbledehoys like you.”
“What did it say, Tinto? This is very, very important.”
“It didn’t say much,” said Tinto. “Just the location, that’s all.”