Apparently he could also see the floor on the other side of the door because he said, his voice oozing amusement, ‘What are you wearing on your feet?’
I glanced down at the dual Miss Piggys and felt the need to defend them. Her?
‘None of your business. What do you really want?’ Although I had to admit I’d rather enjoyed the previous answer.
‘I spoke the truth. I have come to make love to you. Please open the door.’
How arrogant! And you just assume that’s okay with me? That I’m just going to open the door and make another deal with the devil? That I’m even remotely interested in having sex with you after our last trip down the rabbit-hole?
‘Hold on. This is crazy. My street is filled with cops and reporters. Why don’t they see you?’
‘I have created an illusion in their minds. When they look at the porch, they see only what they expect to see.’
‘Uh, huh. Likely story. How do I know it’s really you? You usually materialise out of thin air.’
‘As you wish.’
I heard that familiar little pop sound, felt a rush of air and suddenly knew he was behind me.
I closed the door and turned, hands on my hips. ‘Hey! That wasn’t an invitation!’
A dazzling smile spread across his face. ‘You forget I have that handy little mind-reading ability.’ He bowed from the waist and his platinum veil of hair flowed forwards then back as he straightened. Dressed in a variation of his usual leather-god outfit, he was a feast for the eyes. ‘I rang the doorbell because I thought you would prefer me to enter your home the normal human way. I understand you are weary of the drama that has taken over your life. I do not wish to contribute any further to your discomfort.’
He brought his hands around from behind him. They held a huge bouquet of pink roses and a box of chocolates.
‘Gifts for you, my love.’
He leaned in and brushed my lips lightly with his. The familiar, delicious scent of him filled my nostrils and my lips instinctively puckered in anticipation of more of the same.
Instead he burst out laughing. ‘You have pigs on your feet!’
He thrust the roses and box of chocolates into my hands, scooped me up into his arms and walked us over to the couch. As soon as he was seated with me on his lap, he reached over and lifted my feet, inspecting the colourful porcine coverings.
‘How interesting.’ The longer he stared at the fluffy piggy slippers, the harder he laughed. He pinched the snout between his thumb and first finger and pulled on the tail.
‘Hey! Are you actually going to tell me you never heard of Miss Piggy?’ I said. ‘If so, your contemporary education is seriously lacking. When I was young, she was one of the best-known television and movie characters. Kids loved her.’ I loved her. She was so audacious – everything I wasn’t.
‘I see. Television.’ He grinned. ‘Let me ask you this – why would a vampire spend time doing human activities? How could those things possibly hold interest for such alien creatures as the undead? We might share the world with mortals, but not your reality. Not to be rude, of course, but most of the programmes I have seen on modern television leave much to be desired. Why sit and watch pretend people and situations instead of creating an exciting life? There is so much to know and discover in the world. I have never understood the human tendency to be passive observers.’ He waved his hand towards my feet. ‘But I must admit that your Miss Piggy sounds charming. I look forward to further education. There were no such things when I was a child.’
‘Well, maybe I’ll get you your own pair.’
‘I would be honoured.’ His eyes twinkled with amusement.
He was right about people spending too much time in front of televisions, as well as computers and other media. It had never occurred to me that his ‘species’ might be different in every way – living a parallel but separate existence. As annoying as it was to be laughed at, something about his mirth was infectious and I found myself chuckling in spite of myself.
Once again, whatever resolve I’d built up against Devereux had leaked away in direct proportion to the number of minutes I spent gazing at his perfect face. It was a waste of time for me to argue that I was immune to his charm, or his eyes or whatever it was that caused my normal inhibitions to catch the first plane out of town. For the first time, it occurred to me that I genuinely liked him. He had an adorable little-boy quality.
At some point I must have put the flowers and chocolates on the coffee table because my arms were free to ensnare his neck. Which quickly led to me being flat on my back in my Freud PJs and my piggy slippers with an absurdly gorgeous vampire on top of me, attached at the lips.
So much for a quiet, relaxing evening.
We made out on the couch like teenagers.
As always with Devereux, I couldn’t stop touching him, couldn’t run my fingers through his long, silky, aromatic hair enough. Couldn’t feast on his lips even remotely enough. Couldn’t imagine anything more important than having him inside me.
Even counting my close call with Alan, I hadn’t technically had intercourse for two years and the muscles in my vagina contracted in gleeful, moist anticipation.
He lifted his warm mouth from mine long enough to whisper, ‘Will you invite me to your bed, my love?’
Geez, the guy’s voice should be a registered weapon. It could take you down in three seconds.
‘What happened to all the mind reading? I’ve been sending out the welcome committee for the last twenty minutes.’
‘I know.’ He raised himself up just enough so I could see his pleased expression. ‘But it is important to me to hear the words from your own sweet lips.’ He somehow managed to lift himself off the couch in a flowing motion while scooping me up at the same time. ‘Shall we?’
He carried me up the stairs, the twin Miss Piggys bobbing up and down. But my mind was no longer on footwear. In fact, my entire brain was focused on the fastest way to get us both naked.
We entered my bedroom and Devereux paused at the foot of my bed.
‘You have not changed the sheets since you shared your bed with Alan. I can smell him. I wish to be the only presence here with you.’
He set me down and stood in front of me.
I started to explain that I hadn’t ‘officially’ had sex with Alan and there really wasn’t any part of him left behind, but Devereux gently pressed a finger to my lips, ending the flow of words.
‘None of that matters. Nothing that happened before me matters. I simply wish to make love to you right now in your own bed on fresh sheets. Yes?’
He removed his black leather duster and threw it in a chair in the corner.
Enjoying the view of the physique that’d been hidden under the coat, I moved over to him and lightly kissed his lips. ‘Definitely yes.’
I opened a brand-new set of silk sheets I’d had for a long time but never used, while Devereux stripped off the old bedding.
Quite an efficient team, we smoothed on the new sheets, watching each other with hungry eyes.
‘Do you have candles?’ he asked.
Uh, did I? I thought for a moment and remembered which box in the closet I’d stashed them in. I wouldn’t tell him that I’d only bought them in case the electricity went out and I needed emergency light. I was trying to learn to keep my unromantic, nerdy explanations to myself. At least under certain conditions.
While I was in the closet I stepped out of the Miss Piggy slippers and put them back in their special place, next to my Glenda the Good Witch sandals.
Okay. So I did let my inner child out sometimes.
He took the candles and the holders I’d also retrieved, placed them on the nightstands on either side of the bed and stood back, appreciating his handiwork. He pointed a finger at each of the candles and the wicks burst into flame.