Salim clapped his hands delighted. “Excellent, excellent, I would never had thought to do that.”
Joseph sat in the back, slightly pale, but smiling. “Yeah, she’s always a surprise.”
I put the car into neutral as Salim showed me and relaxed. It was so much fun that my lips stayed set and raised at the corners. The Superior jumped out and said he was going to move the other cars out that he had fixed. “Acquaint yourselves with your new transportation,” he said as he got out and made his way back into the yard through my newly made entrance.
Joseph grabbed me and dragged me into the backseat. I lay across his lap. His warm lips grazed the top of my ear, and I shivered.
“My turn,” he whispered as he unceremoniously dumped me from his lap and clambered into the front seat. He slid the seat back to accommodate his longer legs and nearly crushed my knees in the process. I pulled myself into the seat next to him and attempted to instruct him how to drive.
*****
I was laughing so hard my eyes stung, as Joseph again crunched the gear into place and tried to ease the car forward, only to have the car shudder jerkily and silence like an old man out of breath.
“What’s so funny?” he grumbled, frustrated, as he jammed the gear into place and starting the car for the tenth time.
“Oh nothing,” I said, holding my stomach. “It’s just I’ve never seen you struggle with anything. I can’t believe how hard this is for you, Dr. Sulle.” I giggled.
He grimaced, determination running all over his face, as he dropped it into gear, floored the accelerator, and then hit the brakes in panic with a squeal.
I covered my mouth, trying to keep the laugh in, only to have it explode out my nose. “It’s not funny,” he said, but he was smiling. He swiped his forehead and turned to look at me. “I’m man enough to admit when I can’t do something. How about I navigate, and you drive when we leave?”
“Well, I think that’s best if we don’t want to end up embedded in a wall.” I smiled. Joseph elbowed me gently and chuckled, his head pressed back into the headrest, his eyes on the ceiling.
“So I guess we’re really going to do this,” he said without moving.
“Can you see any other way?” I asked, a hint of desperation creeping into my voice because I was hoping he just might have an answer I hadn’t thought of.
He shook his head. “No, I can’t. I won’t go without you. You won’t go without me. No one else will volunteer. These are crap choices, but I think we have to go.”
I knew that. I slapped the top of his head. I was unwilling to let go of this light feeling. “C’mon, let’s try again and this time, concentrate!”
Because soon enough, we would be weighed down to the point of breaking. We were the wounded, the ones who survived. We owed it to the ones left behind, the ones suffering right now, and the ones yet to suffer though it was surely on its way. If we didn’t do something now, Orry and the rest of our family would always be in the menacing path. I didn’t want to cower and cover my face, as it crushed us under its boot. I wanted to be standing atop the wall, watching as they ran away.
We spent the afternoon driving back and forth down the road, and eventually back to the train station where we would load up our supplies and leave. Some to the Woodlands, most to the different hiding places the Survivors had set up over the years. All of us scattered across the Siberian planes like seedpods taken up in the wind.
I don’t know how to do this. How do we say goodbye to you when it feels like we only just got you back? But I do know you’ll be safe. And I’ll keep your father safe for you. I promise.
The plant, watch, and wait plan was born from my idea. Two people per compound, so as to create as little disturbance as possible—one Spider and one Survivor per team. My father would go to Pau with Matthew. Rash would go with Gus to Bagassa. I had to laugh at the idea of the two of them traveling together. Rash would be lucky to survive the trip.
The cars were brought to the entrance, and each team tried them out. Joseph was by far the worst driver. It didn’t seem to matter what he tried. He was awful at it, which frustrated him to no end and amused me endlessly.
Joseph flopped his head down on the steering wheel, his hair falling through its gaps. He turned his head so that all I could see was one emerald eye, splinters of gold sparkling in the afternoon sun. This was it. It felt like the last of something rather than the beginning. He held out his hand and slapped my thigh. “We should go,” he said abruptly, peeling himself off the seat and heading back inside. I followed.
Tonight would be our last night in the train station before everyone split away and headed to the different hideouts and shelters. Each one could only hold around a few hundred people. Some of the Monkey City dwellers chose to stay. But most had formed friendships, even relationships, with the Survivors over the last six months, and they wanted to leave with us.
We walked into the train station, the monkeys oddly quiet, just tracking us with their filmy, yellow eyes and picking at each other’s fur. I swallowed as I passed under a group of them. I would be glad to be rid of the shrieking, interrupting little monsters.
Joseph held out his hand, and I took it. “So are you sure you’re happy with Pietre taking Orry?” I asked.
He frowned and stared at the ground. “I’m not happy with any of this, but what choice do we have?” I closed my mouth. He was right. There were no choices we were happy to make. Right now, we had to grab at the only ones available to us.
We stepped carefully into the giant opening of the tunnel, immediately noticing the hum and gloomy glow of thousands of people saying goodbye and preparing for a journey.
*****
We jumped down several levels to where Rash and my father were staying, our feet skimming over slimy, black rocks. The fire burned high, and people were knocking cans of drinks together and talking excitedly about their plans. When Joseph and I walked into the light, everyone stared. The couple who would dare to break into the Superiors’ compound was quite a curiosity. Some clapped, others warned, and some congratulated. Someone offered me a can. I took one sip and screwed up my nose. It tasted like dishwater with a burn behind it. I handed it to Joseph, and he swigged it whole-heartedly, his eyes lit up as he swallowed.
We sat together with some strangers and the rest of our group. Odval brought Orry to us. He played with Hessa by our feet as we talked about what was going to happen. Fear was in the air, searing the rocks with electricity. Yet hope-tinged clouds clung to the spiky underbelly of this cave as well. The Survivors had been sitting around, tending their wounds, for too long. Energy surged through the space now that there was an aim. The wounds were our power, pushing us forward, up, over, and inside the walls to crack them open.
Someone tried to hand Joseph another can, but he declined. He shook his head lightly as if to clear it. “You ok?” I whispered as we nursed plates on our knees, enjoying the last taste of fresh meat before we were back to dehydrated jerky.
He ran his fingers over my knuckles gently. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just don’t like how that stuff makes me feel. A bit cloudy in the head, like I’m forgetting things,” he said, tapping his temple.
I leaned into him and tried to prepare. Orry wasn’t going to understand any of this.