“Yes, a historian also must have a brain full of pebbles like an astrologer. We are approaching the dining hall, though. Let’s keep this between you and me.”
“Yes,” his deputy answers, almost in a whisper.
After they are through, the clock shows 1:30 p.m. Only two of them remain in the five huge wood-built dining halls. Outside, the sun is shining full blast everywhere. A gentle breeze runs across the range of trees, which are heavy with scintillating leaves on which dew still hangs in the thick leaf funnels. On the edge of the forest, wildflowers are in gorgeous bloom. The deputy company commander looks at the petals, which are like butterflies displaying their vying colors, vermillion and purple, then sighs:
“How I miss my home! These flowers make me remember the mustard fields along the river. In the spring the mustard flowers bloom yellow, attracting butterflies in the thousands. When young I used to run after my mother to go out and pull up those mustard plants. Then, when we were of marriageable age, we went out to various festivals in the first month, and we could find these yellow mustard flowers all along the foot of the dike.”
“Right, I remember a folk song of the ethnic Vietnamese:
‘The first month is for having fun all month,
The second is devoted to gambling and the third to drinking.’”
“Yes, that’s a folk song from way back. When I was home we would try to get people to work starting with the fifth day of the first lunar month. But even as they worked in the fields, they would find ways to hold spring festivals, for that was the custom.”
“It’s the same way with us in the mountains. We prepare various kinds of cakes, make crispy honeyed rice balls, then play cards all of the first month. Even when we don’t have festivals, there is not much to do since it drizzles all day long. At that time of year, the rice is maturing while the weeding is done in the dry cassava fields.”
“Up there do the festivals last as long as they do in the lowlands?”
“Not as long but enough for people to have fun all around. After the Spring Music Festival is over, we call on one another to go see the Ball Throwing Festival of the Thai, then the Khen Playing Festival of the Meo. Only the strongly built young men in the village, equipped with good steeds, dare go far. As for the women, all year ’round they stay in the village.”
The two fall silent for a long while. Then the deputy asks, “When will the war be over?”
“When?” An echoes.
No one has an answer to that difficult question. A moment of silence follows. All of a sudden, the deputy company commander asks:
“Do you remember Tiny-Eyes Toan?”
“Of course. He’s the buffoon in Company One. Wonder whether his bones have disintegrated by now? It’s been over two and a half years. And there the soil is humid all year ’round with dew settling, intermittent mountain rain, and moss-covered ground all the way from the foot of the cliff down to the gulley below. In that kind of soil no bones can remain intact.”
An does not hear his deputy reply. Turning, he sees the man bite on his lower lip, his face smeared with plentiful tears. His shoulders quiver in waves as if he has malaria. An looks around but luckily there is no one to see them at that moment. After clearing the tables, the kitchen staff had gone back to their chamber to nap. The only souls stirring are probably just the chirping birds in the nearby forest. Raising his hand to console his companion by rubbing his back, An says:
“It’s very good that you can cry like that. Go ahead and get some relief.”
A second voice is heard in his own soul at the same time: “You are lucky to be able to cry with me. As for me, I can only cry by myself. And I will have to do so till the end of my days…”
The two of them sit there until the deputy gets hold of his emotions. On the other side of the grass clearing one can see vague images of naked soldiers. Surprised, An asks:
“What are they doing over there?”
The deputy blows his nose and answers, “They are scooping the gulley water to bathe.”
“Why don’t they go over to the stream? It’s very easy to catch a cold bathing with gulley water. By now the springwater has had time to warm up a bit.”
“Have you forgotten that our division commander has just drowned? This morning they all rushed out to watch right and left.”
“The water flows unceasingly, washing everything downstream. Besides, the stream flows through so many areas, how can one count all those who have drowned from its source down to its lower reaches?”
“That’s true…But our commander died right here, at this stream, so the guys are very afraid. Maybe, being a mountain person, you do not know the fears of us ethnic Vietnamese.…We people from the Red River delta or in other river valleys are all obsessed by the unceasing and wicked pursuit by water ghosts. According to our legends, water ghosts are the innocent souls of those who have drowned. For when they are forced by others to drown in the rivers, they have a chance to escape from hell, and can reincarnate into another life on earth.”
“Is that so,” An answers. And a second voice arises in him: “If that were the case, then the first one to have been forced to drown would have been me. For it’s not just one water ghost but two who would look for a common enemy to take in exchange for their lives. But for a long time now I have no longer known fear. Fear has long since abandoned me, both in my soul and in my brain.”
An stands up and says, “I feel so much like taking a bath. Would you want to go to the stream with me?”
The deputy looks at him, flabbergasted. “Me?…I had a bath yesterday afternoon.”
An laughs and tells him, “There’s no fear. I just need you to sit on the bank and watch me take a bath. If we cannot get rid of this superstition, how can we solve regular problems in the lives of our soldiers? Should more than a thousand guys have to fight for a few drops from this tiny gulley — not much more than a cow’s piss — they will surely come to blows. While this stream, nay this river, is left untouched. I just don’t believe in water ghosts.”
“Yes.”
“Follow me.”
“Yes.”
The deputy answers An mechanically, then he also follows him mechanically. The two of them go to the bank of the mountain stream. Several groups of soldiers who have been in the forest follow them out of curiosity.
Arriving at the stream, An loudly asks: “Who would like to come down here and have a swim competition with water ghosts?”
“Sir, we are not all that courageous.”
“Wait and see.”
So saying, An takes off his clothes and steps into the stream. He goes all the way out to the middle and plunges down and resurfaces several times just like a professional athlete. So doing, he turns his eyes toward the white foaming Thundering Elephant Falls.
“No one is suffering more than I right now. No despair is deeper and heavier than the one right now in my heart. Thus, no force can stop me before I take this revenge.”
The soldiers on the bank clap their hands. Seeing An smile, they clap even louder because they think he is laughing with them. But in actuality, he is laughing at the bitter fate that has befallen him.
3
In the fall of the year Quy Ty (1953) An had been stationed in Tuyen Quang. When a relative in the people’s labor force who carried provisions saw him, she eagerly told him:
“Little One has been presented to the president king, do you know that? The revolutionary organization had found an ethnic Vietnamese for him but he prefers our Little One, so by now your sister-in-law has become the queen, do you know that? Her name has now been changed to Chi Thi Xuan. The twelve families in Xiu Village changed their family name to Chi after they learned the news.”