Miguel nodded. “Of course it does. But we have no other choice. Our world was torn apart by the war, and we were all shot about for a reason. If that wasn’t to get back home, what was it? Keeping on going is all we can do.”
“You don’t think it was to settle somewhere else? To start again?”
“Oh no, we are all separate. I think humans need to be together.”
“But you don’t think the war was to tear you apart?” Hali continued. “You don’t think humans need to be apart because they cannot live together?”
Miguel didn’t answer that which wound Raegan up. How didn’t he feel the same intense passion that she did? Sure, he defended their plan for a moment, but at the most important question, he backtracked? No way, she wasn’t going to have that.
“Humans made mistakes,” she practically growled. “But we will learn. We always do. Good can come from this evil, we will make sure of it. I have been traveling for ten years, most of my life, and I have learned a lot. I’m sure everyone else will as well. We will be better.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend.” Hali’s tone turned quiet. “I was just asking…”
“We cannot get negative, we cannot question what we’re doing, we have no choice.”
“I understand.”
Raegan didn’t believe that she did because Hali had no desire to go back to her home planet, but she couldn’t be bothered to continue arguing. Instead, she stomped on ahead of the others, unable to bear them any longer. She could hear them conversing between themselves, almost whispering secretly. It wasn’t like she cared anyway. Not at all.
Just keep going, she warned herself. Nothing else matters.
Eventually, she realized she’d been walking for an extremely long time, without coming across anything. But this wasn’t like the white world which was empty, this was something else. There was an odd atmosphere about it, something she couldn’t quite put her finger on.
“What do you think lives here?” she asked, finally spinning around to face the others.
Raegan caught Miguel gazing at the witch, and her looking lovingly back too. Her heart sunk down into her feet. What the hell? Sure, things were complicated between herself and Miguel, but that sure as hell didn’t give him the right to allow his eye to wander elsewhere.
Should she say something? Break up the moment?
She wanted to, she wanted to tear them apart really badly. She wanted to kiss Miguel with everything within her and stake her claim. But she couldn’t. She just physically couldn’t move towards him. She was just stuck there, in one place, watching. It was like torture.
She coughed a couple of times, but when that got no reaction, she span around and carried on walking, hoping the others would follow.
And stop damn well looking at one another.
This was a nightmare. Angry tears pricked her eyes as she considered Miguel slipping through her fingers like grains of sand.
This is nothing, her brain screamed. I need to focus on the future, on moving instead.
She focused on her dad, on finding him and the others, they were more important. Miguel and Hali would soon be a distant memory once everything else fell in place. She’d have too many other people to distract her. They could just be together if that was what they wanted… she wouldn’t care. Not one bit.
Fifteen
As they walked and walked, not stopping even as Raegan’s body became exhausted and ravaged, she did everything that she could to talk herself around, to tell herself that she had to be fine with what was going on behind her. After all, they were traveling buddies. Unless she wanted to go off on her own again, she would have to get used to Miguel falling for Hali.
And why wouldn’t he? She might’ve been a witch, but she was stunning, and Raegan had rejected him too many times, she’d pushed him away, consumed with the worry that any romance would lead to them being killed.
I just need to make out that I’m okay, she told herself determinedly. Fake it until I make it.
“Should we rest?” she called behind her, plastering a fake smile on her face.
“Yeah, we could do,” Miguel replied, the happiness in his tone like a knife to Raegan’s chest. “I don’t know about you but I’m feeling shattered.”
They found a place to sit for a while, giving their bodies a moment to rest. Hali took the opportunity to use her magic to conjure up some food. Raegan devoured it gratefully, but it was still incredibly hard for her to look at anyone else.
“Are you okay?” Miguel touched her shoulder softly. “You’re very quiet.”
“Fine,” she replied with a clear warning to her voice.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
Raegan stepped away from him, trying to create a chasm of distance. The last thing she wanted was to make this awkward for the rest of the journey, so the best thing she could do was keep this to herself.
Then again, she was upset and that was difficult to disguise.
“Hali, could you give us a moment please?”
“Why?” Hali asked Miguel, sounding innocent enough, but her question set Raegan’s intuition alight. She was overcome by the terrible sensation that Hali wasn’t quite what she first appeared to be, that maybe she wanted to cause trouble here.
“We just need a moment, that’s all. Just to talk.”
Miguel’s cheeks reddened. It seemed like he was finally realizing what a tricky situation he found himself in.
“I’m not stopping you.” Hali shrugged and smiled. “You can talk with him here.”
Miguel’s face glazed over, his eyes turned a funny pale shade. He looked like he was under a trance, and he sounded that way when he spoke as well.
“Yes, that sounds fair. You stay here while we talk.”
“No. No way,” Raegan snapped. “Whatever you’re doing, Hali, stop it. That’s not cool. Me and Miguel clearly need a moment to talk alone and you should let us have that.”
“Why?” Hali cocked her head and smirked. “For what reason?”
“Just go for a walk. Leave us be.”
“But… I want him.”
Raegan was blown away; she couldn’t believe those words had just come from Hali’s mouth. It seemed that at least she could trust her own intuition which was good… she thought.
“You… you want him?”
“I do, and it’s best for you to know that I always get what I want.”
Hali clicked her fingers, releasing Miguel from her spell, and she span on her heels to stalk off, smug in the knowledge that she had floored Raegan.
“What’s going on?” Raegan demanded, her arms folding protectively across her chest. “With you and Hali?”
“Hali?” Miguel glanced behind him. “Nothing. What do you mean? I’ve only known her for about five minutes.”
“Well, it seems like something is happening, there are feeling between you, and I think you owe it to me, to be honest. If I have to witness you and her falling in love, then… well, I would rather know in advance, if that’s okay with you?”
“I would never…” He moved closer to Raegan, grabbing her hands in his. The warmth of his touch shot all the anger out of her body. Instead, she was left feeling a little lost. “I like you. Only you. In fact, I really like you. Too much.” He smiled. Mostly to himself. “That one kiss back on the zombie-infested version of Earth was enough to have me convinced that we are perfect together.”
Wow… this was insane. Raegan certainly wasn’t expecting all of that.
“So why…?”
“Why did I hold back? I guess for the same reason you did… because it’s a bit wild to fall for someone when all of this is going on.” They both looked around them, considering the madness they were in. “Plus, I was afraid. I know your dad. I know he won’t ever think I’m good enough for you. He idolizes you and he will want someone so much better, stronger, braver than I could ever be. I didn’t think it was the right thing to do.”