Oh, crap.
A soft blue glow sprung up around my mortal self, tinged with flickering sparks of gold. The prison that bound her hissed where the sparks touched it, as they burned tiny holes in the dark metal.
“She can lend me her hope, and take my hurts to herself. Lend me her joy, and love, and indomitable courage, and take all my moments of hatred and despair. Until the me that’s standing here is a girl who’s never given up…”
Her bonds began to smoke. I tried vainly to reinforce them, hoping desperately that she couldn’t actually complete such a transformation.
“…never given in to hate…”
The vines began to sag, their thorns drooping like melting plastic.
“…and never known any pain deep enough to scar her soul,” she finished. Then she stepped out of her prison as if it were nothing but smoke and shadow, and it quietly faded away.
“You…can’t possibly hold that state for long,” I said, grasping at straws.
“I don’t need to,” she said firmly. “I’m sorry, child, but this is going to hurt.”
Then she reached for my conduit to the Nidhogg system, as if she were going to rip it out.
“Are you nuts!” I shouted, now completely panicked. “You can’t get rid of that! The contract enforcement system won’t let you!”
“I have signed no contract,” she replied.
“You formed the seals and filled them with your blood!” I insisted. “You’re stuck with it now!”
But she shook her head. “If that were true, you wouldn’t have needed to make Hinata say she was yours. I won’t make that mistake.”
Then she sang, in the First Tongue, in a voice that burned my ears with fierce compassion.
I do not consent. I deny obligation. I refuse to comply.
There was a subtle shift in the flow of power from the infernal system, and I realized my account had just been locked out. At the moment she was our dominant aspect, and mortals aren’t allowed login rights. But she wasn’t finished.
I have signed no contract, offered no vow, accepted no bargain.
The flow of demonic power that sustained my was abruptly cut off, as that free will clause the Bright Kami always insisted on kicked in. “How are you doing this?” I demanded. She wasn’t a celestial. She was as mortal as Hinata. How could she speak the First Tongue at all, let alone work a Ninefold Refusal?
I refuse your power, reject your demands, spurn your influence. I am Sakura…
I fell to my knees with a strangled cry as my elder aspect Named us both with a word I didn’t fit.
“…and you are no part of me. Begone!”
Then she reached into my soul, and ripped away the umbilical cord of demonic might that bound me to Hild’s will. I screamed as the roots of evil tore free, leaving behind gaping wounds that reached deep into every corner of my being. Little bits of darkness were left behind, burrowing frantically into me to escape the fingers of light that reached to pluck them out, and the pain was too much for even a demon to bear.
Mercifully, I knew no more.
13. Freedom
I woke to blinding pain, and the shrill beeping of an alarm clock I hadn’t heard in so long I’d almost forgotten about it. I flailed clumsily, and finally managed to make the noise stop on my third try. Then I collapsed back into bed, groping through the fog in search of a memory that would explain why I felt like I was coming off a week-long bender. Wasn’t this the start of a new loop? I’d just…
…risked my sanity playing personality mix-and-match with the original me, taking on all of her pain and lending her most of my joy so she could free herself from a genjutsu that preyed on darkness.
…gotten my ass kicked by my mortal self. Crap, she’d broken my connection to the Nidhogg system! Was I even a celestial anymore?
…broken the hold of my demon self’s Sharingan, and severed the source of the corruption that was slowly destroying us. But the effort had been far greater than I’d expected, and the damage to my soul far worse.
Which Sakura was I?
I had no idea. My jumbled thoughts branched and merged again erratically, refusing to settle down into a single stream of consciousness. No voice answered my mental call, and when I tried to drop into my mindscape I found only a swirling chaos of light and sound that nearly made my head explode.
My stomach heaved, and I staggered out of bed like an invalid. I only made it halfway to the bathroom before I tripped over my own feet, and found myself heaving out the contents of my stomach on the floor.
“Sakura,” came my mother’s worried voice from the hall. “Are you alright?”
“No,” I moaned. “Sick. Really sick.”
She took one look at my face and bundled me back into bed with brisk maternal efficiency, checking my temperature and leaving me with strict orders to stay put. I sighed. Miserable as I was, it was nice to be taken care of.
I must have passed out, because the next thing I remember Naruto was sitting by my bed talking about how we’d dominate the chuunin exam together next time. I put my hand on his and mumbled something, and saw him blush before I lost consciousness again.
I woke again to the tickle of a diagnostic jutsu, and found that it was twilight.
“I’m afraid this doesn’t look good, Mrs. Haruno,” a medic-nin was saying. “It almost looks like chakra poisoning, but I’ve never seen a case like this. Her chakra is also being drained somehow, but I can’t tell where it’s going. She doesn’t know any summoning techniques, does she?”
“Oh crap,” I groaned. I groped clumsily, and found the gaping hole where my connection to the infernal system had been. I tried to arrest the flow of chakra leaking from the wound, but for the first time in my life it failed to answer to my will.
“Please,” I gasped. “Need… inverted… Six Sutras… Chakra Seal.”
It was hard to see, but I could make out the medic’s frowning face. “How does a genin even know about that technique?” He asked. “And why would you need to be sealed against spiritual contamination? Kakashi, do you have any idea what she’s talking about?”
Kakashi’s face swam into view, and for once he actually seemed concerned. “Please!” I whispered. “Explain…if I…live…”
“I think we’d better get a Hyuuga to take a look at her,” Kakashi said slowly. “Sakura? Have you been experimenting with new techniques?”
At this rate they’ll sit around talking until you die again, came Hinata’s voice. I can see the problem. You’re right, an inverted Six Sutras Chakra Seal should hold the wound shut until it heals. Give me a moment, I’m not as practiced with these advanced medical techniques as you are.
“Hinata?” I mumbled. “Thank… kami… you’re ok. Wait, you can… see?”
You released me from my bonds, remember? It’s a good thing I have the Byakugan, though. Your mindscape is such a mess right now I doubt a normal person would be able to make any sense of it. Let’s see now, fifth sutra’s anchored, sixth is forming nicely…there. It looks like the chakra leak is stopping, and I don’t see any immediate signs of complications. How do you feel?
“Tired,” I sighed, and fell back into darkness.
I woke to the alarm clock again. This time I managed to hit the button on the second try, and sat up slowly in bed. I still had the mother of all hangovers, but at least I could move.
“Hinata?” I asked. “Are you still with me?”
I’m here, she replied immediately. I think I’ll always be here, unless something breaks our contract.