“Maybe you should open an account for yourself while we’re already here?”
The clerk perked up while Claire blinked at me.
“Why?”
“Well, according to Steve Harvey, every couple should have at least four accounts. A shared household account for the bills, a shared savings account for vacations and unexpected expenses, and two individual accounts for the partners to do as they like, so they won’t have to justify or explain every little personal expenditure.” I explained, and she looked at me in a mixture of amusement and amazement. “I just spent a whole week watching Daytime TV in the hospital, what did you expect!?”
That made her laugh.
“Okay, but what would I put into that account? The joint account with your fa ... with Aaron is basically empty.”
Huh. Did she just consciously avoid calling him my father? That was a nice gesture!
“Ah.” I said, as the Clerk immediately lost interest in our conversation, and pulled out my cash to hand her three-hundred dollars.
“What’s that for!?” she sounded genuinely confused. And more importantly, she didn’t even once glance at the eight-hundred Dollars I was still holding. She was simply wondering why I gave her money.
“Have you forgotten already? Being my nurse? That’s for this week.”
“Oh. Yes. Of course I haven’t forgotten.”
She very obviously forgot about it. Completely. I had wondered if she accepted my offer to pay her so eagerly because she had money trouble, or because it would mean she could definitely stay in my apartment to take care of me. I guess I had my answer right then.
I gave the remaining cash to the clerk to put into my new account, and told him to transfer almost all of my money from my current account into the new one as well. With that, I had $2,600 in the bank, safely out of Aaron’s reach, and once I got back home and could transfer the money from my paypal account, I was definitely able to pay the bills on the first and wait until my salary would come around.
As soon as we were back in the car, Claire reached over and took my hand again.
“Honey, I ... I just want to thank you for giving me a chance. I promise I won’t disappoint you again! I love you very much!” she smiled, and then looked at me with that expectant look I was growing accustomed to.
“Sure.” I responded lightheartedly, emphasized by a nod, and could see from her wavering smile it was not what she had hoped to hear.
What did she expect? I acknowledged her status as my mother and gave her a chance to not immediately screw me over again. She should realize herself that, while this was a long way off from love, it was already a lot better than what she could have expected a month ago.
“Then ... Do you ... need anything else?” she asked, her tone was distinctly less happy.
“Lowes.”
“Lowes? What for?” she asked, but started the car and pulled out of the parking lot without delay.
“They have canes. I want to get rid of the crutch.”
“Doesn’t the crutch work better than a cane?”
“Don’t know about that, but in Dr. House, it looked easier to handle than a crutch. I’ll also look less like I’m a total invalid.”
That got a look from her. First it was disapproving, but quickly turned into pity.
“Honey, no offense, but you’re barely able to wash yourself right now. So...” she let her voice trail off.
“I said ‘less like a total invalid’, didn’t I?” I chuckled, and the topic was done.
While I entered the store, Claire opted to wait outside. I didn’t know why, but I suspected it was because she wanted to avoid the temptation to talk me into a more stylish crutch instead of a cane. I spent a good half hour there, accompanied by a quite eager sales clerk who appreciated my Dr. House reference much more than Claire had. Apparently I wasn’t the first one to ask.
When I came out of the store, Claire hastily ended a phone call.
“There you are. Honey, I’m sorry, but do you have anywhere else to go today?” she quickly asked, a little nervous.
“No, why? You got something planned?”
“No, no. Johnny needs me for something. Could we stop by his place before we go home? Unless you’re tired, of course. I could drop you off before I meet with him.”
I could clearly hear her voice shift halfway through. That offer to drop me off and then visit her brother without me was just an afterthought. She not only wanted me to accompany her for some reason, I was fairly certain that she wouldn’t have a reason to visit John at all if I wasn’t accompanying her. I managed to not let my suspicion show and agreed to go with her.
The reason became pretty clear shortly after we arrived. As soon as we stepped through the door, Claire vanished with John, while Danny offered to keep me company in their living room. Though, I refused to sit next to her on the sofa when she offered me the seat.
The last time I was in this house, we had discussed buying the foreclosure houses at the kitchen table. The last time I was in their living room, however, was Ava’s sixteenth birthday. When I saw Claire fuck her brother on that very sofa Danny was now sitting on, and later saw Maggie suck off her father on that same sofa. Looking for alternatives, images of Logan fucking Danny on the Loveseat popped into my memory. The only piece of furniture that didn’t spark memories of the discovery that started me on this journey, was the armchair, so that is where I sat while ignoring Danny’s curious look.
“So.” she said, and straightened herself out after moving seats to sit a little closer to me. “How are you?”
“Fine. How about you?”
“You sure you’re ‘fine’, Tim? I thought we were past you holding back.” she smiled.
Realizing she ignored my question to keep digging, I understood what she was doing.
“So it wasn’t John who Claire was on the phone with when I came out of the store, it was you.” I observed, and her smile vanished. “How about you get to the point and simply tell me what you need this time, instead of trying to sneakily coax information out of me?”
She shifted uncomfortably, and it wasn’t just because of my cold tone of voice. I instantly knew my assumption was correct. It was remarkable how often that happened whenever I simply assumed they were trying to deceive me in some way. Now I knew they needed something from me. I took a good look at the room and the connected doors, waiting for one of those to open and reveal some sort of surprise.
“I’m sorry. Old habits. I assure you we don’t plan on deceiving you or anything like that. I just thought it would be better to ease into the topic.” She sounded like she actually meant it, and I decided that there was no use in speculating. I would learn the truth one way or the other anyway.
“Alright. Then, why am I here?”
“I hear you called Claire ‘Mom’ again.” she smiled again, waiting for me to say ... something. When that didn’t happen, and I just looked at her waiting to continue, she did. “And yet, you still refuse to respond when they tell you that they love you.”
I looked at her in astonishment for a moment before I found my voice again.
“Refuse? Danny, I’m not punishing them.” I said matter of fact, and could see I had hit the nail on its head by the way she recoiled in surprise.
“You ... you’re not?” she sounded just as astonished as I had felt a few moments ago.
“No. Why would you even think that? Did it never occur to you that I’m not refusing to say it, but simply refuse to lie about it?”
“You mean...” Her eyes grew big. That was obviously not a possibility she had entertained so far.
“Yes. I’m sorry if that’s not what you want to hear from me, but that’s how it is. And it’s been that way for a while.”