Kristen’s brother, Will, was going to a college in Boston. His grades weren’t spectacular, but Kristen’s family could easily afford the tuition. This year, Will had picked out an apartment nearby and was living off-campus.
I told Kristen about my mother, and my step-family, which she had already met and charmed. She said that she really liked Merry, especially her precociousness, which is more or less the same way I felt about my step-sister.
We talked about Jack, my best friend (I guess he’s now my best "male" friend), and even Patrice. I was a bit surprised when I found that Kristen didn’t have many nice things to say about Patrice — of all the people in Kristen’s old gang, Patrice and somebody named Dale had always seemed to Kristen to be the biggest gold diggers. I told Kristen about how nice Patrice used to be, and the two of us wondered what could have changed Patrice. I had always thought it was Kristen’s influence, but having gotten to know Kristen better, I was starting to have my doubts.
Kristen gave me some pointers about what to expect in tenth grade, and offered to help me with any subjects that I might find difficult. I made the same offer to her, which probably amused Kristen.
And, of course, Kristen was a very sharp card player. Talking with her took my mind from the game, but even if I had been concentrating one hundred percent, and not distracted by our conversation or the presence of the loveliest blonde Goddess on this planet, I would have lost.
Kristen told me that she had learned how to play from an old Hoyle book her father had given her, and the book also detailed strategies. Kristen played continually with her brother up until her brother left for New England. I made a silent vow not to try her at poker.
On the way home, I considered inviting Kristen for dinner again, but decided that twice in a short period of time would get my mother on again about my being in love. I still wasn’t completely sure if I was, but both Patty and Mom had been pretty adamant.
As I went to get out of the Camaro, Kristen touched my arm. "Jim?"
I turned back to Kristen. "Yes?"
"Would you mind if I… if I visited you with Patty tomorrow morning?" Kristen looked worried that I might say no.
I had no problems with that, and figured that Patty probably wouldn’t as she had invited Kristen herself the other day. "I’d love to see you. Are you sure you want to come?"
Kristen didn’t answer me. Instead, she pulled me closer by my arm and gave me a warm, wet kiss.
Yes, I guess Kristen was pretty sure.
I think I was a bit distracted at dinner, but this was no longer unusual for me, and my family didn’t ask if anything was wrong.
Mom did ask me how my day went with Patty and Kristen, and I had told her that I had only seen Patty for a couple of hours, and had spent most of the day with Kristen.
"Ah, I saw you drive up in her Camaro," my mom answered.
Merry looked a bit disappointed. "Hey! She promised to take me for a ride in that car!"
"Soon," I smiled to my step-sister. "Kristen promises!"
"Kristen is a nice girl," my mother said before changing the subject to whatever it was she did that day. Luckily, she didn’t embarrass me with her insistence that I was in love with Kristen.
In my room, I saw the crumpled bag that held my roll of tickets. I realized that I hadn’t used them very much in the last couple of days… in fact, I hadn’t used them at all!
I thought back to when I first found those tickets. It was only about ten days ago, but it felt like it was a much longer time. I thought about my taking advantage of Merry, and how I humiliated Patrice. I felt a pang of remorse as I thought back about Marla, who was living in California, and was probably angry at me for standing her up a few days ago. I remembered Kneely Park with Wendy, Camille, and Patty, and then Patty and Kristen.
One thing that I realized was that I seemed to have grown up from a naive fifteen year old boy who was pretty ignorant about sex to a much more sophisticated young man who now had five girls as friends, two of which I had a much closer relationship. In fact, I might actually be in love with one of them, if Patty and my mother were correct.
I was also still a virgin. My sex life now mostly consisted of watching girls masturbate, occasionally masturbating them myself, and receiving hand jobs and blow jobs. And this was much better than it had been only ten days ago, when my only sexual partner consisted of a palm and five fingers.
A part of me wanted to finally go "all the way" with a girl, but I really wanted my first time to be special. I had discussed this a few times with Patty, who I had already decided wouldn’t be my first "real" sex partner. I didn’t explain my reasons, but told her that I was looking for the perfect situation. She seemed to understand that, and thought that it was a good idea.
Part of the reason I eliminated Patty from my list of potential sex partners was fear. Her first time with a boy that way left a big emotional scar on her psyche. Her second time was very disappointing, since she was unable to achieve her release. Patty wanted her next experience to be the one for her… the one that would make her dreams come true. "Fireworks," as she had described it to me during one of our back rub sessions. As inexperienced as I am, I doubted that I’d be able to fit the bill, and I think Patty probably agreed. She was looking for somebody that she was in love with, and who loved her as well. I did love Patty, but not in the way she needed.
Wendy and Camille were eliminated from my list, as my friendship with them wasn’t as deep as my closeness to Patty. I had been astounded when Camille made an offer for a "little one on one" the day I humiliated Kristen in front of her, since I didn’t think our relationship was that close. I had since found out, from gossiping with the girls, that Camille’s attitude toward sex was that it was simply a recreational activity. That eliminated her completely from my list… at least from my list of candidates for my first time. I was looking for romance and something special.
Of course, I would never consider Merry a possibility. She was too young, and even if we weren’t blood relatives, she was still by step-sister. I’d never forgive myself if I did something like that, and I’d probably castrate any guy that would ever consider anything but the very best for my little Shortcake.
Marla was impossible, living in California, but she would probably have been a wonderful partner. She wasn’t too shy, she was witty, and she seemed to enjoy her experience with me in the park. I thought about Marla for a few minutes, thinking about her body, her face… something could have clicked there. Unfortunately, I was too busy being careless with a few of my tickets to actually meet her right before she left to go home. I had stood Marla up. I think I’ll never forgive myself for that until my dying day.
I knew that my list was missing one obvious choice… my little blonde Goddess.
Kristen was lovely, a walking wet dream. She seemed shy, but when she opened up, she was just as beautiful inside as she was outside. Wendy, Camille, and Patty all warmed up to her very quickly, despite their original belief that Kristen was a bitch. Whoever came up with the phrase "beauty is only skin deep" had never met Kristen. She had a pretty nice sense of humor, and really laughed when I said something funny, crinkling her nose the way I had described to Patty.
Patty told me that Kristen was in love with me. She also told me that I was in love with Kristen, and now, alone in my room, with nobody else for me to be embarrassed in front of, I truly considered my feelings toward Kristen. I thought about what Patty said to me earlier that day, and realized that there might be more than a little truth in what she said. Kristen was definitely lovable, and if I loved Patty, then my feelings toward Kristen were probably a little deeper.