Now, Cailin grew pale and shoved the trencher away from her. The very thought of food was nauseating.
Ceara divined the trouble immediately. "It is the will of the gods," she said quietly. "Sometimes they are kind, and sometimes they are cruel, and sometimes in being kind, unkind. You and Brenna are alive this day because your journey in this world is not yet done. Would you dare to question the wisdom of the gods, Cailin Drusus?"
"Yes!" Cailin cried. "Why should I live when my family does not? What could my brothers have possibly accomplished in this life that rendered their existence no longer necessary in this world? They were just seventeen!"
"I cannot answer you, child," Ceara said honestly. "All I can tell you is that everything happens when it is supposed to happen. What is death? It is but the doorway between this life and the next. We need not fear it. When your time comes, Cailin, those you love who have gone before you will be waiting on the Isles of the Blest for you. Until then it is your duty to the gods who created you to live out your destiny as they have planned you to live it out. You can, of course, whine, and despair about the unfairness of it all, but why would you so futilely waste the precious time allotted to you?"
"Am I not allowed to mourn then?" Cailin asked bitterly.
"Mourn the manner in which they met their ends," Ceara said, "but do not mourn them. They have gone on to a far better place. Now eat your breakfast, Cailin Drusus. You need your strength if you are to care for Brenna."
"Do not treat me as if I were a mindless child, lady," Cailin said.
"Then do not behave like a child," Ceara replied with a small smile, rising from her place at the board. "From the look of you, you are a girl full grown, and we are not idle people. You will be expected to earn your keep, which will leave you little time for feeling sorry for yourself." She turned from Cailin and began to serve breakfast to the others who were now entering the hall.
"Do not let my grandmother's bark fool you," Corio said with a grin as Cailin glared fiercely at Ceara's back. "She is noted for her soft heart. She only seeks to prevent you from hurting yourself."
"She has an odd way of showing it," Cailin muttered darkly.
"Would you like me to tell you about the family?" Corio asked in an attempt to distract her. When she nodded, he began, "Although our grandfather has sired ten sons, only three live in this village: my father Eppilus, and my uncles Lugotorix and Segovax, they are Bryna's sons. The others, and their families, are scattered about the other hill-fort villages belonging to the hill Dobunni. Our grandfather has five wives."
"I thought he had only four," Cailin interrupted.
"Four living, but he had a total of five. Bryna went to the Isles of the Blest some years back. Then Berikos married a woman named Brigit two years ago. She is not a Dobunni. She is a Catuvellauni. Our grandfather makes a fool of himself over her. She is not much older than you are, Cailin, but she is wicked beyond belief. My grandmother is chief of Berikos's women, but if Brigit decides to oppose Ceara's decisions, Berikos supports Brigit. It is very wrong of him, but it amuses him to encourage her in favor of his other women. Fortunately, Brigit is content to allow my grandmother and Maeve their responsibilities regarding the household. Such is not her forte. She prefers to spend her days in her own house, perfuming and preparing herself for my grandfather's pleasure. When she ventures out, she is accompanied by two serving girls who almost anticipate her every desire. They say she holds our grandfather by means of enchantment and secret potions."
Three tall men, one with dark hair, the other two with hair like Cailin's, came to sit down next to them.
"Mother says you are Kyna's daughter," the dark-haired man said. "Are you our sister's child, my pretty girl? I am Eppilus, the father of this handsome young scamp, and youngest son of Ceara and Berikos."
"Yes, I am the daughter of Kyna and Gaius Drusus. My name is Cailin," she replied quietly.
"I am Lugotorix," said one of the auburn-haired men, "and this is my twin brother, Segovax. We are the sons of Bryna and Berikos."
"My brothers, Titus and Flavius, were also twins," Cailin said, and then to her great mortification, tears began to slide down her face. Desperately she attempted to scrub them away.
The three older men looked away, giving the girl time to compose herself as Corio put a shy arm about his cousin's shoulder and gave it a squeeze. It was almost the undoing of Cailin, but she somehow managed to find humor in her situation. Poor, good Corio was making an attempt to soothe her, while in reality his kindness was close to sending her into a fit of hysterics. She needed to weep and to grieve for her family, but not now. Not here. It would have to be later, when she could find a private place where no one else would see her tears. Cailin drew a deep, calming breath.
"I am all right now," she said, removing Corio's protective arm.
Her three uncles met her steady gaze with admiration, and Eppilus said, "You still wear your bulla, I see."
"I am not married," Cailin told them.
"Inside your bulla there is a small bit of stag's horn, and a flat droplet of amber within which is a perfectly preserved tiny flower," Eppilus told her. "Am I not right, Cailin?"
"How did you know what my amulet contains?" she asked, surprised. "I thought that my mother and I were the only ones to know. Not even my grandmother knows what is within my bulla. It is blessed."
"Aye, but not by any of your phony Roman deities," he replied. "The stag's horn is consecrated to Cernunnos, our god of the Hunt. The amber is a bit of Danu, the Earth Mother, touched by Lugh, the Sun; the flower caught within it signifies fertility, or Macha, who is our goddess of both Life and Death." He smiled at her. "Your mother's brothers sent you this protection before you were even born. I believe it has kept you safe so that you might one day come to us."
"I nevet knew," Cailin said softly. "My mother said little about her life before she wed my father. I think the only way she could not hurt missing the ones she loved was to put them from her entirely."
Eppilus smiled. "How well you knew her, Cailin. Such wisdom in one so young is to be admired. I bid you welcome to your mother's family. I imagine that my father did not. He has never been able to forgive Kyna for marrying Gaius Drusus, and that prideful attitude has cost him so much. He loved your mother greatly, you know. She was his joy."
"Why does he hate Romans, or anything touched by their culture? Few real Romans have been in this land for years now. My father's family has intermarried with Britons for so long that there is little if anything Roman left in us. Only my original ancestor was a pure Roman. His sons married Dobunni girls just as my father did."
"Our father," said Lugotorix, "is a man very much enmeshed in the past. Britain's past. The past glories of the Dobunni. A past that began to fade and change with the arrival centuries ago of the Romans. Our history is not a written one, Cailin Drusus. It is a spoken history, and Berikos can recite that history like a bard. Ceara, who is closest to him in age, remembers Berikos as a young boy. He was always consumed by our people and their past. He knew that he would one day rule us, and he secretly longed to restore the Dobunni to their former glory. When the legions left, Ceara said he wept with joy, but in the years since, little has happened to change Britain.