“You boys coming?” My exhale comes as a blow through pursed lips as I sway deeper into the woods. You got this. As long as you act the part, you’re in control.
Behind me, the guards share a sick laugh. The kind that makes me want to be anywhere but alone with the pair. A quick peek through the branches gives me a visual of the clearing. Jasyn and the others continue their exclusive club meeting. I’m not so naive I think they’re oblivious to me. It’s just they don’t care.
A stick snaps. My stomach churns, but I’m able to force my body to remain steady enough so my internal quivering goes unnoticed. I let my eyes search left and right, scouting the area. Trees with branches too high to reach tower over me. Climbing’s out then. What about—?
“Not so fast, doll.” A meaty hand claps my shoulder, spins me around. “Wait for us.”
“Yeah,” the one called Oscar says. “Stay awhile.”
I inhale and shut them out, tuning to the light within. Despite my brush with my less-than-Verity side, I know my Mirror’s in here somewhere. It’s crunch time.
A breeze sweeps through the forest, rustles the leaves so they titter above me. One of the guards begins to whistle. The sound is eerily calming. I listen and wait, seek the rhythm of the atmosphere. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say the trees had a song of their own.
“The breeze does blow,
Sweet and low,
Through my branches.
The wind does sweep,
Soft and deep,
Through my branches . . .”
The melody soothes me, making me feel less alone.
Then Oscar moves behind me.
And everything tilts.
His hands find my waist. He sways me. “Wanna dance?”
Don’t they sell deodorant in Oz? One whiff of this bottom-feeder and I’m gagging on week-old BO.
I attempt to regain my lungs—and my personal space—but his hold remains firm. “No, thank you.” My voice is not near as commanding as I’d like it to be. Not even close. I can’t lose my resolve now. Not when I need it most.
“There is another way . . .”
The new voice moves in a wave through my head. Mine, but darker. Confidence bordering on arrogance. Who are you?
“I am you.”
The nameless guard takes his place in front of me, joining in Oscar’s poorly executed tango.
I gulp. Crud. This isn’t going as planned. Granted, my only plan included practicing my song, seeing if one of my Mirror abilities might manifest. But now things have gone too far.
“Don’t panic,” the other me says. “Panicking is for weaklings. You still have a song, just not the one you’re familiar with.”
My gut grows cold. Ice. Snow. No light. No warmth. I can almost imagine the Verity isn’t here at all.
“That’s it,” she whispers. “Harden. If you’re hard, no one can break you.”
My jacket comes off. Oscar tosses it to his friend, who chucks it into a nearby tree. They snigger.
Enough.
Front dude gets my knee to his groin.
The move they clearly didn’t expect catches Oscar off guard, but he’s quick. Yanking my arms behind my back.
I scream, then twist and bite his hand, using my weight and the split second his yelp of pain gives to escape his grasp. I could run now. Didn’t I do as much when Kyaphus tried to attack me on Eighty-First back in New York? If I join Jasyn and the others, I’d be choosing the lesser of two evils, right? Maybe not, but I’ve dealt with my grandfather. This is a nightmare turned sick reality TV show.
“No. Defend yourself. They deserve it. They were going to—”
I am fully aware of their unchivalrous intentions. Just let me think for a second.
“You’ve asked for it now, girly.” Oscar has returned, licking his lips as he creeps forward.
Mom would say go.
“Stay,” a voice shouts inside. “Sing.”
For the first time in far too long, I find my voice. Emotions rise, anger and hatred at their helm. The melody is my medicine, the cure for the pain that ails. But instead of releasing a song filled with love, I find something new and different. Other. The black notes coil around my heart, squeeze. The only way to breathe is to let them loose. So I grab a fallen branch and sing.
“You are the reason for my rage,
Locked me in a cage,
Tried to tear me like a page,
I said no to your yes,
But you persisted anyway.
Enough.”
My muscles move as if they belong to someone else. Oscar catches the branch on my first swing, heaves, but I hold strong. He tugs and I pull. When he’s close enough, I claw his face, then grab his shirt, digging my nails into the skin on his neck. I make a noise that is neither scream nor cry. “Get the crowe away from me!”
He stumbles backward into a tree, eyes bulging. “You’re insane.”
“You’ve surprised him now. Good. Keep going. Don’t stop until he’s learned—”
I should go. He’s not going to hurt me. His buddy’s already run off . . .
“No . . .”
Yes.
I drop the branch, hold my head. Breathe, breathe, breathe. Gasp, gasp, gasp. This is crazy. I am crazy.
Oscar scrams and I do the same, but in the opposite direction. When I reach the edge of the clearing, I pause. Catch my breath. Glance up to find Jasyn, Odessa, and the Lioness exactly where I left them, none the wiser to my dilemma.
What was that? My mind . . . it’s like it had a mind of its own. I need some water, or at the very least something to counteract the shadows I let get too close. A memory. Focus on something from before.
One from my childhood surfaces. Here, in this land that’s broken the borders of my imagination, defied every hope and dream I ever held for the City of Emeralds, how can I sing anything else?
“Somewhere over the Rainbow” pours out, not from my throat, but from my heart. My Mirror song may be lost forever. This new version of me seems to keep clawing her way to the surface, a relentless disease of the soul inspired by the Void itself. I dare not try to find my Mirror for fear I’ll be let down once more. But this song isn’t for anyone but me. It’s not meant to get me anywhere or accomplish anything. To save anyone or help everyone. This is just mine.
Because I love to sing. Joshua understood. So much he even wrote me my own melody, played it on the piano while we were trapped together beneath the deck of a ship. But my need for melodic oxygen goes back much further. Even when I was alone, song was my companion. During my darkest moments, music never left my side.
My soul swirls this way and that, one of Odessa’s twisters, cycloning within. My thoughts wander to a day I conquered one of my many fears. As much as I still hated my complexion, hid from my reflection, the day my elementary school caught fire was when I stopped hiding my song from the world. I’ll never forget the older boy who helped me. A stranger who showed me that true kindness wasn’t a Fairy tale. I never saw his face, but I didn’t have to. His touch warmed me the way the Verity does now, melting—no, crushing—the ice that formed beneath the trees.