Kris didn’t intend to be the one. “You fired on and destroyed our pod. You say you are sorry you did. Why?”
“Why” was hardly out of her mouth before the Iteeche stormed back—this time in Iteeche. Nelly quickly translated “I do not explain myself or my actions to any scum-eating monkey. I will speak with chosen Kristine Longknife, a spawn of Chooser Ray Longknife, or this conversation is over.”
Nelly cut in fast. “Kris, the ‘I’ he chose is very close to Imperial. Someone is suddenly using precise grammar.”
So much for talking to the scum-eating monkeys in their own jabber, Kris thought. “Then translate this into as high and fancy as you can. ‘You are talking to Princess Kristine Anne Longknife, great-granddaughter of King Ray Longknife.’ ” Kris was about to add king of 150 plants but thought better of letting an Iteeche in on the present fragmented state of humanity. “You fired on the messenger pod I ordered dispatched to my king. Explain yourself.”
“I adjusted the declensions, but I am sending just about what you said, Kris.”
“Good, Nelly,” Kris snapped.
“I’ve fought in a couple of wars,” Colonel Cortez said, hand over his mouth. “Never actually been around when one was being started, though.”
“I don’t know why anyone would come across all this space to talk to one of these damn Longknifes,” Abby grumbled.
“Step on my toes, you better expect to get kicked in the shins,” Kris growled.
“Well, at least he’s thinking about what to say back,” Penny said, her fingers ready to change where her lasers were pointed.
The reply timer stretched, two, three, four minutes.
“You sure do know how to close down a conversation.” Captain Drago sighed as he tried to get more comfortable in his command chair. “Anyone else hungry?”
“Starving,” Chief Beni replied immediately.
The captain tapped his commlink. “Cookie, please pass some midrats around. And don’t ignore the bridge too long.”
“No problem, Captain, I’m hungry, too,” said the cook.
The reply counter passed five minutes.
“That Death Sphere doing anything, hostile or otherwise?” Captain Drago asked.
“It’s not so much as twitching,” Chief Beni reported. “Same acceleration. Same jamming. Nothing to show anyone’s there.”
“Let me know if anything changes.”
“I will,” Nelly said pointedly.
Nelly, feel free To HAVE The WASP ZIG, ZAG, AND pin-wheel well Before any HUMAN eye NOTICES a TWITCH FROM The ITEECHE warship.
So you TRUST Me To DODGE, JUST NOT SHOOT, the computer spat back in Kris’s head.
Nelly, I Don’T TRUST anyone BUT Me To SHOOT.
BUT you EXPECT Me To TRUST you.
Nelly had a point, but Kris chose to ignore it. EVERYONE else Does. Why NOT you?
Nelly said nothing back, but Kris could hear more than the usual hum in her head as her computer went about its business. Nelly was thinking a lot.
The reply clock was still counting up when Cookie brought a tray with several kinds of fresh-baked bread, butter, and steaming coffee onto the bridge. Kris had intended to relieve Penny on weapons so she could get something. However, the smell brought on some serious grumbling from her own stomach. So Kris postponed her good intentions until she’d had at least one piece of the cranberry-oat bread.
Thus Kris had her mouth full when Nelly announced, “I’ve got a message from the Iteeche. It requires translation.”
“So translate it,” Kris muttered through her stuffed mouth.
“It’s High Iteeche, Imperial court member, make that high, very high Imperial court official to, ah, oh right, an equal. Yes, that’s equal to equal. No insult here. This is pure head-high muckety-muck to equal mandarin.”
Kris swallowed. “What’s he say?”
“Give me a second. This is not easy. But here is what I have so far. ‘Hail, Honored Princess Kristine Longknife, chosen of the choosers . . .’ ”
“We’ve heard that all before.”
“Yes, but he or she has to say it back in all the right declensions and fancy talk. Let me get on with it. I am also working on the rest of the message. Give a girl a break.”
The last was pure human twelve-year-old.
“Okay, but hurry,” Kris said in straight Longknife short-tempered.
“Where was I,” Nelly said, sounding hurried. “‘Hail, Princess-Nose-in-my Face, with all kinds of whipped cream on top.’ Shows what he knows about you.”
“Tell us the message!” didn’t come just from Kris. Drago, Jack, and Cortez had also run out of patience.
“Okay, okay, this is new, ‘Greetings from Ron’sum’ Pin’sum’We qu Chap’sum’We. Chosen of the choosers and speaker for the bah ba-bah ba-bah, I think the Iteeche have a new emperor. Honored and exalted I bear words to he who is now honored and exalted among men as King Raymond Longknife,’ and it goes on like that, which shows how much they really learned about him.”
“There’s got to be a message in there somewhere, Nelly,” Kris snapped. “I’m sure you’ve translated it for yourself.” If Nelly no longer responded to orders, maybe her vanity could be tickled.
“Of course there is a message. He wants to come over and talk to you.”
“Why?”
“He didn’t say.”
“Kris, I wouldn’t suggest you answer this flowery message with a curt demand,” Penny got in quickly.
“I know. I know,” Kris said, wondering if she could eat the entire loaf of cranberry-oat bread. It was good! However, Kris suspected a bit of worried eating might be viewed as very noblesse not obliged and be grounds for mutiny for most of the bridge crew.
“I guess I’m gonna have to invite him over for tea and crumpets,” Kris grouched.
“My goodness,” Abby said, hand up to cover a wide-gapping mouth. “Methinks our stubborn princess has met her match. I, for one, want to meet this guy, gal, or fish, whatever.”
Kris ignored the joke. “Give me reasons he wants to come over here.”
“To slit all our throats,” Colonel Cortez said.
“He could have blown us out of space,” Penny countered. “Us and those two Greenfeld cruisers. He didn’t even fire a shot.”
“Give the boy one point for politeness,” Abby said. “Course, that don’t mean he won’t go rude on us once he’s aboard.”
“Accepted,” Kris said. “Give me a nice reason he wants to come over.”
“It’s hard to play poker when you aren’t eye to eye,” Captain Drago said. “And this is a very-high-stakes game.”
“Agreed,” Kris said, finding that she was already busy figuring out how to manage the first human-Iteeche meeting in eighty years. And do it with what she had available on one small explorer ship. That Iteeche was back to using high mandarin. Now was no time to appear a poor, working relation.
“Penny, Jack, Captain, Colonel, am I giving in too easily on this? Every time I’ve followed my agenda, he’s replied from his agenda. I don’t see any value in repeating what he’s ignored. Still, do I want to get eyeball-to-eyeball with this dude?”
“He is offering to come to you,” Captain Drago said. “We’ve only got his ship and our ship. Not many options for neutral territory. He’s offering to meet you on your ship. That looks like a major concession.”
“Assuming he doesn’t blow it up,” Colonel Cortez added.
“He’s had plenty of chances and hasn’t,” Penny noted.