“For a walk… I’m sorry.”
I sat on the bed, feeling annoyed and a bit guilty. I know he wants me as much as I want him, I just thought I would try my luck.
Shortly after James left, there was a knock at the door. I got out of bed and ran to the door, convinced that James had come to his senses.
“Oh, it’s you.” There was disappointment in my voice.
Mr Kemp stood there in his flannelette pyjamas, brown, of course. He looked irritated. He was cleaning his glasses and hadn’t yet acknowledged that I had answered the door. He walked straight into James’s room, ranting and raving, something about Mr Barclay needing to go for a walk at this hour. When he finally put his glasses on, he looked at me and paused for a while.
“Ah… I see. Are you trying to kill him?” Mr Kemp said, laughing as he sat on the desk chair, fiddling through James’s books. I put on the robe and sat on the end of the bed.
“Cathy, have anymore strange occurrences happened since… that day in Mr Barclay’s office?”
Here we go.
“No, not really.” I replied frustrated.
“You don’t seem very sure about your answer!”
“It’s… little things.”
“Can you tell me what they are?” he asked, with a soft voice. He turned his chair around to face me, obviously pleased that I had covered myself a bit more.
“Well… I feel like I am having déjà vu episodes nearly every day… It could be something as small as brushing my hair, or even whole sentences that I say to James.”
“Anyone else? I mean other than Mr Barclay? Do you have these déjà vu feelings with anyone else?”
“No, just James. Maybe because we have been spending more time with each other and, to be honest, when we aren’t together I can’t stop thinking about him.”
“And do you have any thoughts about this?”
“No, not sensible ones.”
“You know, we really haven’t spoken about that day in Mr Barclay’s office, but I cannot understand how you did not notice the difference between James and… well, you know.”
“Our ghost Mr Kemp? I think about that every day and it makes me feel ill in my stomach. But, to be honest, there wasn’t much distinction for me to even consider that it wasn’t James in the room with me. Honestly.” I paused and sighed. “What do you think, Mr Kemp?”
“Oh, it does not matter what I think.”
“But it does. I know you and James know a lot more than you’re letting on, and it irritates me! You’re expecting me to figure it out all on my own and there is a chance I may never figure it out. What then?”
“In a year’s time, you will be back in Australia and all this will be a distant memory.”
Distant memory!
I was about to abuse Mr Kemp for even mentioning my return to Australia and leaving James, when I heard footsteps at the door. James opened the door and Mr Kemp immediately stood up, said goodnight and left. James was still in the doorway when Mr Kemp passed him. They exchanged glances and James came into the room, locking the door behind him. He placed his keys on the desk and walked without delay towards me.
“Hello…” he said with a smirk on his face.
“Hi… Did you enjoy your walk?” I replied, a matching smirk on my face.
“Yes, thank you. I want to apologise. I shouldn’t have encouraged you. I need you to understand. There is one other thing that I want more than having you completely: your safety! Now, unless you want to spend your nights with Mr Kemp, I suggest you take off what you’re wearing and put on something that covers you right up. Oh, and when I mean take it off, you can do that in the bathroom.” He grabbed my shoulders, turned me around and marched me off, like a child, to the bathroom. I could see that there was no choice but to follow his orders. The thought of spending my nights with that mad scientist filled me with dread.
I put on my usual attire: long pants with a t-shirt and came out of the bathroom. James was in bed again, reading. I got straight under the covers and lay on my pillow.
“Good night then,” I said, irritated.
“Good night, my love,” James replied.
There they are again… those same words.
I felt like James had said those words to me a thousand times before. I found it hard to sleep. What Mr Kemp had said to me kept playing, over and over, in my mind?
If I don’t figure this out, it doesn’t matter because I will be gone by the end of the year? Is that what James also feels? It can’t be. I have to figure it out, even if I have to tempt fate. I need to know.
CHAPTER SEVEN
The next morning, James had to wake me for my run with Jules. I hadn’t slept well, disturbed by the thought of being sent back to Australia and being separated from James.
That will never happen! I just won’t allow it!
I rushed to get dressed. I didn’t want Jules knocking on my door looking for me.
“Enjoy your run.”
“Will do.”
James opened the door, poked his head out and then gave me the ‘all clear’ to leave. I headed for the stairs. I didn’t even get halfway down when I spotted Jules heading up the stairs.
“Good morning, sleepy head. I knocked on your door but you didn’t answer, so I assumed you were already down there waiting for me.”
“Sorry Jules, I didn’t hear you. I must have been in the shower. Why aren’t you dressed for our run?” I enquiry.
“Oh dear Catherine, I feel like I am coming down with something and it looks like it might rain. I really don’t think it’s a good idea for me to run this morning.”
“Oh, that’s fine. Get some rest and I hope you feel better soon.”
“I will walk down with you to the front lawn,” she said as she turned back around and headed down.
“Oh Jules, I think I will also give it a miss.”
“Oh, no… I will be so upset if you don’t go on account of me. You know the track and if it does rain, head for the old miner’s cottage to wait it out.”
I didn’t know what to say, so I nodded and smiled as I headed back down the stairs.
“OK, but you go back to your room, don’t come out again.”
“Alright. Have a great run.”
I started out on a slow jog, still hesitant about whether I should actually go. I hadn’t been on my own like this for months, but I had to go. Jules had insisted. I just wondered what James and Mr Kemp would do when they found out. It was colder than usual and the grounds were wet and muddy from last night’s heavy rain. The weather was gloomy and the air misty, which suited my mood. I wished I hadn’t worn my three-quarter tights and new joggers. The muck on the ground was now on my lower legs and all over my white shoes. I couldn’t pick up my pace for fear of slipping and the jog seemed to drag on forever. I was bored, cold and annoyed. I started to think about Mr Kemp and how happy he would be if I did go back to Australia. He could have his room back and would not have to babysit me again.
But how would James feel? I would be crushed. I can’t imagine me living happily back home anymore. I have to stay.
As I contemplated all the possible scenarios, the rain started pelting down. I pulled my hood over my head. I was so angry with myself now, for going on this run, especially without Jules. I tried to decide the best course of action.
Should I turn back now and have a 40-minute run back in the pouring rain or should I take the cottage trail, about 15 minutes away?
I stopped and took a second to decide. Unexpectedly, I became conscious of soft voices behind me. I turned around quickly, but I could see no one there. My heart started racing, blood rushed to my head, I felt panicked and at that moment decided I wasn’t going back.