Upstairs, there are four bedrooms. Two can hold a double bed, and two a single bed. There is a bed and a dresser in each room; the closets, to save money when they were built, do not have doors. The walls are bare. One bedroom has a window air conditioner in the window; the apartment is quite warm on hot summer days. There is one bathroom. Three televisions are in the house, including one in Ms. McAllister’s bedroom. Most of the time at least one set is on. Unlike Alexander Williams’ mother, Ms. McAllister does not restrict television watching. Indeed, she finds television useful. As she says, “It will be on all night long because I keep my TV on all night long. That’s how I go to sleep.” Although the McAllisters once had a phone, for much of Harold’s fourth-grade year they haven’t had one due to budget constraints. Ms. McAllister receives messages from the school at her sister Lavina’s house, and her neighbor Latifa also takes messages.
THE FAMILY
The McAllister household is headed by Ms. Jane McAllister, a tall, lively thirty-three-year-old woman with a highly developed sense of humor and a booming voice. During our visits, she usually was clad in cutoffs and a T-shirt dating from her days as a high school athlete. She receives public assistance but hopes to work again. Ms. McAllister has four children. Harold (age ten) and his sister Alexis (nine) live with her full time. Their older brother, Lenny (seventeen), and sister Lori (sixteen) live primarily with Ms. McAllister’s mother, who lives a few minutes away by bus. Lenny and Lori come by the McAllister apartment regularly during the week and often stay overnight, especially on weekends.
Ms. McAllister is a devoted aunt. She provides a home for her nephews, Runako (eleven) and Guion (nine). The boys’ mother, Ms. McAllister’s sister, Dara, recently lost her home and is now staying in the housing project with her friend Charmaine. Knowing that the boys do not like their mother’s friend and do not feel welcome in her apartment, Ms. McAllister has invited her nephews to stay with her. They often come four or more days per week, eating meals, taking showers, and sharing a bed with Harold. Their presence puts a strain on the already tight food budget.
Another guest is Ms. McAllister’s twin sister, Jill, a cocaine addict. She does not have a key, but occasionally enters the apartment by slipping in through a window. She sleeps on the couch. Jill has two daughters, Halima (three), and Monique (ten months). The previous year, when Harold was in third grade, Jill and her children lived with the McAllisters. Subsequently, Jill was accused of child neglect and the girls were removed from her care. Jane and Jill’s sister Lavina (who lives in a small apartment about fifteen minutes away by bus) took in Halima and Monique. Lavina has a serious medical disability, but, with help from her live-in boyfriend, she is able to manage caring for Jill’s children. Ms. McAllister regularly visits her sister Lavina and her nieces. Jill, however, is able to see the children only under supervision and she does not visit them often (she missed Halima’s third birthday party, for example).
In addition to Ms. McAllister, the children, and Jill, the McAllister household includes Keith, Ms. McAllister’s common-law husband. Keith is a long-distance truck driver who is often gone for days at a time. He returns home between trips. He plays basketball with the children, especially Harold, but he does not assume the role of a parent. Finally, there is Hank, Harold and Alexis’s father. Hank visits regularly even though he and Harold’s mother are no longer romantically involved (they never married). At fifty-seven, he is much older than Ms. McAllister (he has daughters older than she is). Hank is a mechanic. He drops by the apartment after work, lies down, and goes to sleep. Ms. McAllister laughingly explains: “Hank will lie on the bed. I’ll be coming and going, and he’ll be laying down.”
Some weekends Harold takes the bus across town to visit Hank in the house he shares with his mother and two brothers. These overnight stays usually are not formally planned in advance; Harold “just shows up.”1Alexis does not accompany Harold on these trips. Sometimes, though, Hank’s daughters (Alexis’s half-sisters) come over and take her out. Hank contributes to the household periodically, for example, by buying pizza on Friday nights. He sometimes gives Ms. McAllister money for the children, especially for clothing. He expresses pride in his son’s accomplishments and attends key events in Harold’s life (e.g., fifth-grade graduation). He does not usually manage Harold’s day-to-day care or discipline him.
Table 3 lists the individuals who live in and/or regularly visit the McAllister apartment. Usually, there are five to seven people staying overnight in the house and, when both Jill and Keith are there, as many as nine.2 The children sleep in different beds on different nights. Sometimes they ask for help finding room:
RUNAKO: Hey, Jane. I can’t get in. Harold’s spread across the bed.
JANE: Move Harold’s butt over. He’s sleeping on the short way. Just push him over some.
Unlike in middle-class homes, there is not a clear sense of private space in the McAllister’s apartment.
The family lives under formidable economic constraints. Ms. McAllister receives Aid to Families with Dependent Children for Harold and Alexis, and she has a medical card for doctor visits.3 Although she uses food stamps, food is often in short supply. The children always ask permission before they eat something; we never observed them helping themselves to food. When put out, food usually disappears rapidly, as there are many mouths to feed. For example, one afternoon, an entire large box of saltine crackers and some jam is devoured in thirty minutes as Harold and Alexis, Runako and Guion, a neighbor’s three-year-old grandson, myself, and Ms. McAllister snack and talk.
On special occasions food may be plentiful. At a birthday party for Jill’s daughter Halima, hot dogs, buns, mustard, Kool-Aid, and Cheese-Its were in abundance. More often, however, there is not quite enough to go around. One Friday night, for instance, the two pizzas in the oven must be divided among Ms. McAllister, Harold, Alexis, Lori, Hank, and Jill. When Harold asks for a second piece of pizza, he is redirected to drink soda. Another night, each child has one meatball, canned yams, and canned spinach for dinner. There is not enough for second helpings.
TABLE 3. OVERVIEW OF MCALLISTER FAMILY
Money is in equally short supply. The family forgoes some things—like dental care, stylish clothing, and hair treatments—and shares others, like transportation costs.4 Ms. McAllister’s sister Dara loans her bus pass to the family for outings and sometimes friends supply car rides. Among the children, the desire for money, and the access it brings to material objects, is palpable. They clamor for money one morning when Lenny comes by and holds out some dollar bills before their eyes. Their longing is clear, too, when they make wishes. In response to, “What would you do if you had a million dollars?” Alexis said:
Oh, boy! I’d buy my brother, my sister, my uncle, my aunt, my nieces, and my nephews, and my grandpop, and my grandmom, and my mom, and my dad, and my friends, not my friends, but mostly my best friend—I’d buy them all clothes . . . and sneakers. . . . And I’d buy some food, and I’d buy my mom some food, and I’d get my brothers and my sisters gifts for their birthdays.
Harold and Alexis, however, do not press their mother or father to buy them things:
We stop outside [a clothing store] and Hank carefully [looks] at clothes and at the prices . . . Harold looks too . . . Harold seems withdrawn, almost wary. He leaves it up to his father to take the lead. The entire time of the trip, I never heard him say, “Can I have xx” or “Can I have yy?” We went past candy, videotapes, books, magazines, sports shirts, sports bags, and he never spoke up.