“Can I help you?” asks an impeccably groomed, Audrey-thin sales associate. She tells me her name is Beatrice.
“Um…uh…yes,” I stammer. “My boyfriend’s looking for something special to give me for my birthday. He wants it to be right.” I have no clue why I’ve launched into this fantasy. Maybe I’m so mental I need to see a shrink.
The saleswoman beams. “You’ve come to the right place. Your boyfriend must be someone really special.”
“Y-yes,” I stutter. She has no idea.
“I suggest this diamond necklace. It’s one of our signature pieces. Classic Elsa Peretti.” She takes out a necklace from the display case and lays it on a black velvet pad on the counter. Under the overhead halogen lights, the bling blinds me.
“It’s platinum and the diamonds are all D-colored stones…VVS1 quality.”
Having no idea what all that code language means, I admire the stunning necklace with its abstract pavé diamond heart pendant. So sleek. So elegant. So Katrina.
“Yes. This is perfect,” I splutter. Too perfect! “My boyfriend has an account here and told me to put it on his credit card. I hand her the “dummy” credit card Brandon gave me. To protect his identity, he has many with false names.
I stare at the exquisite necklace while Beatrice swipes Brandon’s card. It’ll look beautiful around Katrina’s long, slender neck. I’m sure he’ll give it to her at their romantic dinner tonight. The reservation at the Polo Lounge is all set. I almost didn’t make it, but I was driven by my unquenchable desire to please him.
The saleswoman’s breathy voice brings me back to the moment. “Wonderful. The charge went through.” Handing me the receipt, she smiles brightly. I eye it and gasp silently. Twenty-five thousand dollars. A bolt of jealousy tears through me. Score one for Katrina.
“Is your boyfriend coming by to pick it up or does he want it sent?”
“Actually, he’s out of town right now and wants me to take it with me.”
“Would you like it gift-wrapped?”
“Yes,” I mutter, still drowning in jealousy. “He’d like that.”
“Wonderful. I’ll call someone.” Moments later another Tiffany’s staffer comes by to take the necklace to gift-wrapping.
“Thank you,” I mumble as he skirts off.
Beatrice clears her throat. “In the meantime, can I show you some engagement rings? With that extravagant gift, I’m sure he’s going to pop the question sometime soon. Perhaps Valentine’s Day?”
Valentine’s Day is just a few weeks away. The only question that pops inside my mind is—what will Brandon get Katrina for the occasion? I’m sure I’ll be back here.
“So may I?” asks Beatrice, her voice pitchy.
“Sure,” I say with hesitation. My stomach knots. Why am I playing this cruel game with myself?
Beaming, she leads me to the engagement ring section. I immediately spot Katrina’s ring. It’s hard to miss. The sparkling elliptical-shaped diamond outshines and outsizes the others by miles.
“How much is the ring in the front row center?”
Beatrice’s smile widens. “Just a little over a million dollars. It’s a flawless ten-carat D-colored marquise.”
GAH! A million dollars? He spent that much on her? I feign composure.
“Would you like to try it on?”
Just the thought of this mega-expensive ring on my finger gives me butterflies. I shake my head. “It’s lovely but not my style.”
I sidestep to the next display case. Beatrice tracks with me.
Scanning it, my eyes take in the various beautifully displayed rings. And then I see it. A magnificent rectangular amethyst flanked by two glittering triangular diamonds. The stone is the color of Brandon’s eyes. My favorite color. It’s calling my name.
“May I please see the ring with the amethyst?”
“Of course.” With a somewhat haughty attitude, Beatrice sizes me up. “I’m not sure if it’ll fit your finger. It’s a sample that’s made for a very slender hand.”
Inside, I’m simmering. She just called me a fattie. Well, I’ll show her. In a calm, collected voice, I assure her it will.
Doubt is written all over her face. “Very well. Let’s give it a try.”
While she removes the ring from the case, I plant my hands on the glass countertop.
Beatrice’s eyes widen with surprise. “Why, I think it’ll fit you just fine. You have the most elegant fingers I’ve ever seen.”
“Thank you,” I say proudly. Thank you, Mama.
She sets the ring on another velvet pad. My eyes stay fixed on it. It’s so, so beautiful.
“This is one of our newest settings. Many young brides prefer a colored stone to a traditional diamond. This one consists of a five-carat amethyst of the highest quality. The Trillian baguettes weigh over a carat. I think it will look lovely on you.”
My heart and hands tremble in unison as I slip the exquisite ring onto my long, slender ring finger. It fits perfectly. Holding up my left hand, I admire it. My heart hammers against my chest.
Beatrice flashes a smile. “It fits you perfectly, and it looks absolutely stunning on your hand.”
“It does.” My voice is small and dreamy.
My eyes stay riveted on it. My pulse speeds up. Yes, this is the ring I’d want Brandon to give me.
Beatrice cuts my fantasy short. “Should I put a hold on it, dear?”
“Yes,” I mutter. A permanent hold.
“Wonderful. Why don’t you and your boyfriend come back over the weekend? You can show it to him. When he sees it on your hand, I’m sure he won’t be able to resist.”
I twitch a faint smile. “We’ll try to do that.” The tone of my voice is far from chipper. While Beatrice assures me the ring will be waiting for me, the assistant returns with a gift-wrapped blue box containing Katrina’s birthday present.
“Enjoy your lovely necklace,” Beatrice says as she places it inside a small Tiffany-blue shopping bag. Just like the one Audrey carried in the movie.
I take one long last look at the amethyst ring before I remove it from my finger. Reality stares back at me. Who am I kidding? Even if Brandon wasn’t engaged, he’d never marry an overweight nobody like me. My aching heart tanks. There’s no rainbow’s end for me.
Zoey
With now the heaviest of hearts, I run a few more errands for Brandon in Beverly Hills. I drop off a pair of his expensive Italian loafers at the “shoemaker to the stars” for re-soling, go to the beauty supply store to pick up more of his favorite grooming products, and then run into an exclusive wine store to pick up a bottle of Cristal—which I’m sure is for Katrina. Of course…he’ll propose a toast before he showers her with that gorgeous necklace.
I have one last chore before I head back: a stop at a store in West Hollywood called The Pleasure Chest. A package is waiting there to be picked up under the name “John Steele.” Another birthday present for Katrina?
When I step into the store, my eyes grow wide with shock. It sure as hell isn’t Tiffany’s. It’s an emporium filled to the gills with all kinds of sex toys and accessories for both men and women. To my amazement, it’s packed with customers, including many who look like they’re close to sixty. I guess with the huge success of Fifty Shades, everyone’s into kinky sex. An unsettling thought hits me: Is this the kind of sex Brandon and Katrina have? Or maybe tonight they’re going to experiment, and he’s going to surprise her with some birthday toys?
With a mixture of curiosity and apprehension—and an undeniable twinge of jealousy—I wander up and down the aisles. In the toy aisle, there are dildos and vibrators in every shape, size, and color, ranging from monstrous latex cocks to tiny vibrating bullets. I gravitate to one of the vibrators. “Sparky.” It’s molded like a huge pink penis and has an amusing rabbit ear attachment.