Taylor knew she was pushing him away. He didn’t know why, but he knew she would only do this if she had to. So even if he couldn’t have her, he still wanted her to be safe. Grabbing her by the shoulders, he held her firmly, needing her attention. “You have to live for you.” He demanded, “Promise me, Jude, when you feel alone, you’ll live.” His voice faltered. “I can’t live knowing you no longer breathe, that you no longer walk this world with your love, with your life.”
She pressed herself against him, needing to hear his heartbeat one last time. “I never had a reason to live before. But now, I can live because I’ve loved and I’ve been loved.” She looked up at him, her eyes pink from crying, and smiled. “Our love was spectacularly wonderful.”
“And reckless.” He breathed her in.
“The most reckless of love affairs.”
Touching her neck gently, he always loved the delicate angle. “Jude?”
“I’ll never forget you, Hazel.” She slipped from his arms and took several steps away.
“I’ll never forget you,” he added. “I’ll never forget the first time I saw you. I’ll never forget eating ice cream in the middle of winter. I’ll never crave breakfast like I do for dinner.”
“Don’t do this, Hazel.”
“What am I doing, Jude?”
Backing even farther, she said, “You think you’re convincing me of a future that can be when really, you’re convincing yourself.” Sighing, she tilted her head while watching him pull at his tie. “Go now, before you say something that I can’t say no to. Go back to your beautiful life. You’re free to start over without the problems I bring. Go, Taylor.” She started walking, but stopped and said, “But occasionally, think of me.”
“I don’t believe you, Jude Barrett.” He let her go this time, but made sure to say, “You can’t hide your love away forever. And when you’re ready, I’ll be here and we’ll be together again.”
Jude had no doubt.
Suddenly she was grabbed and embraced. Her eyes fell closed and this was everything. Everything that mattered. He felt so good, too good—warmth and safety, like ice cream on a hot day, and hot cocoa on a cold night. He was made of the best things in life.
“We can leave together. Go right now. Anywhere. Anywhere in the world, Jude. They will never find us. They will never find you. They won’t be able to hurt you anymore.”
She turned her back to him again, but heard shuffling behind her. Almost to herself, she said, “I’m not as strong as you think I am.”
“You’re stronger,” he said, his voice echoing his persistence. “You’ve just forgotten.”
“I need peace in my life. That means life without you.” The silence behind her grew as she continued, “I will always love you, Hazel.” She wanted to keep distancing herself but she loved him too much to ignore the name she loved the most.
As she walked away, she thought about the year ahead. She was right to set him free. She couldn’t hold him back from living the life he deserved. Staring at the long sidewalk ahead of her, she knew she had to let him go. For now. And if he found happiness, found a better life without her, she would let him go forever.
Legally, her aunt and stepfather owned her again. With her heavy, miserable and broken heart she travelled back to her incarceration.
One more year.
Taylor stood there, watching her, watching his soul leave his body, choosing to reside in another. The battle today was over. Defeat was never easily accepted. Heartbreak even harder. Caleb stood beside him and watched Jude go, and then asked, “Do you believe her?”
Looking over at him, he said, “No. She’s not a selfish person. They know this.”
“What are you going to do?”
Taylor needed to think this through, to figure out what was really going on, but deep down he knew any conclusion he came to wouldn’t make a difference to the outcome.
She was convinced what she was doing was right. He’d seen the conviction in her eyes. “I have my wife taken away because I’m sick. I have my life taken away because she’s sick. The legal system has failed me. I have no idea what I’m going to do.”
JUDE WALKED INTO the pink bedroom and found documents on the vanity where her brother’s photo used to be. She sat down and looked at them.
Her back stiffened when she heard her stepfather’s voice behind her, “Sign the document.”
She looked at him in the mirror. “I don’t care about the money. You can have it all. If I sign it all away, can I go free today?”
“Judith, how would that look to the courts. I can’t just have you going around, of sound mind, and telling all our secrets. The deal stands as is. One year. No one will be the wiser.” He sat down on the bed as if they were friends. “You know, Judith, I didn’t plan any of this. My brother was weak—of mind. He promised he would stop… He promised, but he didn’t. Guilt got to him before I could have. You were never meant to be a pawn, but when he killed himself, an opportunity was presented. Your aunt and I had plans. We loved each other back then.”
A shudder of shock rolled through her. An image of her mother behind Hazel in court came to mind. Is this why she chose the better side? “You don’t love my mother?”
“I love her, but she’s soft. We didn’t plan this. Leslie came to me—”
“Leslie? You’re blaming her? You sent me away to be tortured. You sent me away for money—blood money, guilt money, dirty, hate-filled money.” She held up the papers and said, “I would have given you this money years ago if I had known about it. I would have rather had my life.”
“You tried to kill yourself twice. Now you say you wanted life? I spared your life. I saved your life.”
“You saved me to get the money. You’ve played this all wrong. Don’t you see?”
Standing up, he said, “I see a spoiled little girl who wants a shiny new toy. But Taylor Barrett will never be yours until every last cent is mine and safely in my bank account.” He walked to the door that had no lock. “Sign the papers, Judith. This game is exhausting, so do us both a favor and sign.”
“I don’t trust you.”
“Sign the damn contract!” His harsh glare softened though not friendly in any way. “I’ll keep my word, but in the meantime, the Barrett boy is off limits.”
His name is Hazel. She gulped.
Too much pain.
“Your word has no value to me.”
“Don’t push me.” He walked out and slammed the door behind him.
Jude looked down at the contract again. They had been very clever, different names up top, varying amounts transferred. But she had no way to fight back, nothing and no one truly in her corner to help, so she picked up the pen and signed, taking her trust and handing it over to the people she hated most.
One year.
Her life for his.
But what if he would no longer be hers?
JUDE WORE JEANS. She never wore jeans, but then again, she had never set out to break someone’s heart before. Again. Break his heart again. Looking in the mirror, her face was sallow and her cheeks sunken in. She had not been eating much and it was wearing on her physically. Emotionally she could have cared less about food.
Hazel was the only sustenance she needed and he was no longer there. She knew she had to let him go. She just needed to hear his voice one last time.
Walking downstairs, she saw Roman in the foyer. He turned and gave her the gloomiest look, one that kind of summed up her predicament. She sat on the bottom step and he sat down next to her. “Where you going, Hummingbird?”