To own you under my legs.
But you are a seed and you can
Root and bloom through my chest.
Your still waters boil the fiends
In the teapot, prepared for lunch.
Wine fills the poisonous cups.
With pearls into your womb I cum.
I teach you my DNA.
You raise the demons of mine.
Then you drive spikes to their hearts.
The trust you bury alive.
Your hair is coiling like snakes.
Pandora`s box of my reign
Is open.
So you are to blame.
You break the sand-glass into dust.
You weep with the tears of mint.
I want to put you in chains,
To carve your forehead with "SLAVE"...
I want you.
Stop and exhale.
The air is fresh. Radiation.
You`re loyal like a spaniel.
You expect from me certain actions.
You sow the poppies- "Inhale!"
You come to me.
And you bend your knees.
I gulp my saliva, like a sword.
I appeal for mercy the cockcrow.
Domination. I am your God.
But something tells me - I am bogged down.
Something tells me - I am in distress.
I wish I would better run out.
But my heart throbs to my chest.
My legs are becoming rubbery.
You will leave and I will fall dead.
And no poppies can promise recovery.
To escape! The fire expired!
But I bear my cross to the Calvary.
2017
The Beauty
- What is beauty, my dear Lord?
- Banks of snow on the graves,
Bullfinches` bloody craws,
Candle fever in your hands.
- What is silence?
- It`s the Moon,
Stiffened wax on pallid skin,
Dreams devouring your mind,
Gentle whisper of the Doom.
- What is kindness, my dear Lord?
- Kindness is the bullet`s speed
That retains your smile on face
As you`re falling down to bleed.
2017
The Neverland
I`ll rive all nerves inside your mind
As human dies inside your eyes.
Inside your soul is cruel dark,
It meets the strike and turns to spark.
I will ignore the soul noise
It`s better music than your voice.
I`ll paint it blood in all details,
Those dragons fly in fairy-tales
I`ll fetch my ass to Neverland
For things I`ve promised to defend,
In shattered walls of dust and lust
I`ll find new things to be discussed.
I will disgust, I will tear out
All things I am to say aloud,
I`ll bleed my hate to sniffling sins,
But do my best to be convinced
In purity of sacred soul,
In things that happened for control,
For new cold snow, for my mute plea
And lucid reason of my need.
Of need to scream and to be heard.
Of need to stab and feel the hurt,
For cruel mind to make the wounds,
For body lay in silent woods.
2016
These are no gods who bake the pots
These are no gods who bake the pots,
These are no gods who left me burns.
The scream freezes on lips.
Horn of Amalthea is down and spilled.
I used to be strong and prolific.
But I let the Trojan horse in.
Can you hear the sound so dismal?
These are groaning salts of cold seas.
My heart leaps up from the chest.
Bloody red is the dew on my lips.
You squeeze my poor throat.
I will never revive by your kiss.
I will die as soon as you want it.
I will turn into shrill light,
Between shadows I will be haunting,
And I`ll thrive on the king`s head in July.
These are no gods who bake the pots;
These are no gods who grow the trees.
In the wind the fire cools down.
Devils sink in the poisonous seas.
2017
An I ce B reath
I trust in your silence and freedom.
I trust in your virgin hand.
I trust in the wisdom of heaven.
I trust in the whisper and steps.
I trust in the snow falling down.
I trust in the night chained by ice.
Everything what you wanted came true.
Everything what did not - will arise.
Will arise once in the kingdom -
In the Kingdom of Neverland -
Where are no ridiculous borders,
Where dancing stars never fade.
I trust in the games formed with rules.
I trust in the ears heard my gaze.
The blizzard sweeps over roads,
As a bloodless hound in chase.
The planets denied Absolute.
All waters of the seas have turned back.
Words have burned my books with deep black,
Throwing my heart to the cliff foot.
2017
The Log H ut
The chimney-lamp is twinkling at the window.
And outside the sable forest sleeps.
The watchful eye hangs over snowy meadow.
And black tail-coat of night is tensed through peaks.
Hark! That`s Dark Spirit walking through the woods,
It spreads beyond the timber circle.
Inhale and feel - the snow tulle
Has filled your lungs and tightly curdled.
The globes of eyes dance. The apple crunches -
So green and so gentle, as the poison.
And outside the window the orchard hunches,
Bogged down in the snow, deeply frozen.
Here Paradise is gone and Heaven left.
The Nippy Night reigns over there.
Huge dragonflies are itching in your throat.
Your mind is slowly going blear.
And spasms are squeezing deafly silence.
Life dances waltz on the cutting blade.
The fear and lust crave for the violence.
The sweep of whip.
And you breathe again...
Again you breathe. And taste of blood
Eclipsed the dismay, having left rich heat.
The blood is sweet like heady wine.
The scar is buzzing like a sting.
And life starts throbbing like a fry,
Got to the filled but narrow glass.
And red velvet of hot witchcraft
Makes your shy heart lascivious.
2015
Faith*
Put me to bed
With faith.
Give me the name
of death.
Then, please, sell me
Your soul
For incoming in me
And invasion in me
With your pole;
For my veins stained up
With mud;
For the words in the night
"You are a slut" ;
For abuse in respond
To my kiss;
For my craving after
Your twigs.
Put me to bed
With death.
Give me the name
of faith.
Then save your soul
For my sake.
Word of honour is "No"
We break.
2014
* in Russian variant the author used word "whip" instead of "faith"."
Faith" keeps the rhyme.
Give me
Give me some peace. Give me more than delight.
Give me something like life. Make it deeper than wound.
Healing is worthless. These are things no one can uproot.
My wings are broken. I lose my flight.
Fatigue, pain and snow. Again - sweat. Again - sparks.
Looking under my nails, you find blood and mud.
You are in my thoughts. You are in my life.
I am virgin like Eva. But for you I am a "slut".
Like a strand of hair in the wind I`m out of order.
My heart is your target. You`re holding the gun.
You know, my note is sodden with poems.
But it`s worse that your name is so close to mine.
Give me a dream. Give me more, than the terror
Of the moment I feel gunpoint chill to my head.
I just want to live in a sweet torment,
Feeling the iron of the key, eating the heart in my chest.
The turn of the key ... I have almost survived...
You are welcome to my heart, full of the smoke.
I burned everything... But my love is alive.
Everything has its turn, its joy and its woe.
Your departure. My fire. My answer. Your strike.
2017
No Margarete
Deep madness. I am at gunpoint.
My eyes water. Revenge is just a game.
I became a stranger to my Lord.
To speak more precisely - I have stayed...
The madness is like current in the wires,
It`s like a blade against the neck.
I am all in ice and laughter in the darkness
Of our room, where I forget the shame.
So I undress in front of flickering candle.
You are the Master, who I appreciate.
And I am ready to sleep in burning cradle
For love to be reborn from blinding hate.
The room is dark. And you are absent.
Red-haired, naked I carve the wooden floor -
It used to keep our secret and now it keeps my talent.
You pour salt on wounds. I try to close the door.
Deep madness. Lack of taste. Your lies.
I spit at wounds. Look! I am already gone!