He handed me a small, plain bag. Puzzled and excited, I opened it up. Lip gloss, the kind I liked. I'd complained to him a number of times how I was running out, but I'd never thought he was paying attention.
"How'd you manage to buy this? I saw you the whole time at the mall."
"Guardian secrets."
"What's this for?For my first day?"
«No,» he said simply. "Because I thought it would make you happy."
Without even thinking about it, I leaned forward and hugged him. "Thank you."
Judging from his stiff posture, I'd clearly caught him by surprise. And yeah…I'd actually caught myself by surprise, too. But he relaxed a few moments later, and when he reached around and rested his hands on my lower back, I thought I was going to die.
"I'm glad you're better, " he said. His mouth sounded like it was almost in my hair, just above my ear.
"When I saw you fall…"
"You thought, 'Wow, she's a loser. "
"That's not what I thought."
He pulled back slightly, so he could see me better, but we didn't say anything. His eyes were so dark and deep that I wanted to dive right in. Staring at them made me feel warm all over, like they had flames inside. Slowly, carefully, those long fingers of his reached out and traced the edge of my cheekbone, moving up the side of my face. At the first touch of his skin on mine, I shivered. He wound a lock of my hair around one finger, just like he had in the gym.
Swallowing, I dragged my eyes up from his lips. I'd been contemplating what it'd be like to kiss him. The thought both excited and scared me, which was stupid. I'd kissed a lot of guys and never thought much about it. No reason another one-even an older one-should be that big of a deal. Yet the thought of him closing the distance and bringing his lips to mine made the world start spinning.
A soft knock sounded at the door, and I hastily leaned back. Dr. Olendzki stuck her head in. "I thought I heard you talking. How do you feel?"
She walked over and made me lie back down. Touching and bending my ankle, she assessed it for damage and finally shook her head when finished.
"You're lucky. With all the noise you made coming in here, I thought your foot had been amputated. Must have just been shock. " She stepped back. "I'd feel better if you sat out from your normal trainings tomorrow, but otherwise, you're good to go."
I breathed a sigh of relief. I didn't remember my hysteria- and was actually kind of embarrassed that I'd thrown such a fit- but I had been right about the problems this would have caused me if I'd broken or sprained it. I couldn't afford to lose any time here; I needed to take my trials and graduate in the spring. Dr. Olendzki gave me the okay to go and then left the room. Dimitri walked over to another chair and brought me my shoes and coat. Looking at him, I felt a warm flush sweep me as I recalled what had happened before the doctor had entered.
He watched as I slipped one of the shoes on. "You have a guardian angel."
"I don't believe in angels, " I told him. "I believe in what I can do for myself."
"Well then, you have an amazing body. " I glanced up at him with a questioning look. "For healing, I mean. I heard about the accident…."
He didn't specify which accident it was, but it could be only one. Talking about it normally bothered me, but with him, I felt I could say anything.
"Everyone said I shouldn't have survived, " I explained. "Because of where I sat and the way the car hit the tree. Lisa was really the only one in a secure spot. She and I walked away with only a few scratches."
"And you don't believe in angels or miracles."
"Nope.I-"
Truly, it is a miracle. You lead a charmed life….
And just like that, a million thoughts came slamming into my head. Maybe…maybe I had a guardian angel after all…
Dimitri immediately noticed the shift in my feelings. "What's wrong?"
Reaching out with my mind, I tried to expand the bond and shake off the lingering effects of the pain medication. Some more of Lisa's feelings came through to me.Anxious. Upset.
"Where's Lisa? Was she here?"
"I don't know where she is. She wouldn't leave your side while I brought you in. She stayed right next the bed, right up until the doctor came in. You calmed down when she sat next to you."
I closed my eyes and felt like I might faint. I had calmed down when Lisa sat next to me because she'd taken the pain away. She'd healed me….
Just as she had the night of the accident.
It all made sense now. I shouldn't have survived. Everyone had said so. Who knew what kind of injuries I'd actually suffered?Internal bleeding.Broken bones. It didn't matter because Lisa had fixed it, just like she'd fixed everything else. That was why she'd been leaning over me when I woke up.
It was also probably why she'd passed out when they took her to the hospital. She'd been exhausted for days afterward. And that was when her depression had begun. It had seemed like a normal reaction after losing her family, but now I wondered if there was more to it, if healing me had played a role.
Opening my mind again, I reached out to her, needing to find her. If she'd healed me, there was no telling what shape she could be in now. Her moods and magic were linked, and this had been a pretty intense show of magic.
The drug was almost gone from my system, and like that, I snapped into her. It was almost easy now. A tidal wave of emotions hit me, worse than when her nightmares engulfed me. I'd never felt such intensity from her before.
She sat in the chapel's attic, crying. She didn't entirely know why she was crying either. She felt happy and relieved that I'd been unharmed, that she'd been able to heal me. At the same time, she felt weak in both body and mind. She burned inside, like she'd lost part of herself. She worried I'd be mad because she'd used her powers. She dreaded going through another school day tomorrow, pretending she liked being with a crowd who had no other interests aside from spending their families' money and making fun of those less beautiful and less popular. She didn't want to go to the dance with Aaron and see him watch her so adoringly-and feel him touching her-when she felt only friendship for him.
Most of these were all normal concerns, but they hit her hard, harder than they would an ordinary person, I thought. She couldn't sort through them or figure out how to fix them.
"You okay?"
She looked up and brushed the hair away from where it stuck to her wet cheeks. Christian stood in the entrance to the attic. She hadn't even heard him come up the stairs. She'd been too lost in her own grief. A flicker of both longing and anger sparked within her.
"I'm fine, " she snapped. Sniffling, she tried to stop her tears, not wanting him to see her weak.
Leaning against the wall, he crossed his arms and wore an unreadable expression. "Do…do you want to talk?"
"Oh. . " She laughed harshly. "You want to talk now? After I tried so many times-"
"I didn't want that! That was Rose-"
He cut himself off and I flinched. I was totally busted.
Lisa stood up and strode toward him. "What about Rose?"
"Nothing. "His mask of indifference slipped back into place. "Forget it."
"What about Rose? "She stepped closer. Even through her anger, she still felt that inexplicable attraction to him. And then she understood. "Shemade you, didn't she? She told you to stop talking to me?"
He stared stonily ahead. "It was probably for the best. I would have just messed things up for you. You wouldn't be where you are now."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"What do you think it means?God. People live or die at your command now, Your Highness."
"You're being kind of melodramatic."
"Am I? All day, I hear people talking about what you're doing and what you're thinking and what you're wearing.Whether you'll approve.Who you like.Who you hate. They're your puppets."