I shook my head.
Cam dropped his forehead to mine and he clasped my cheeks gently. His eyes searched mine. “It feels good getting that off my chest. I don’t want there to be secrets between us.”
I smiled as he leaned forward, kissing the corner of my lips, but I barely felt the touch. Cam settled back, pulling me against his chest. I snuggled closer, but coldness still seeped deep into my bones. He’d shared this major secret with me, even though he’d feared I would judge him somehow, and I had remained quiet, keeping my secrets close to my heart. That wasn’t fair, and I couldn’t shake this terrible premonition that it would somehow come back around.
How can you live with yourself?
Cam kissed the top of my head, and my breath caught
I wasn’t sure how I did.
######
Chapter 28
I hadn’t really noticed it till then, but there had been a stress that Cam carried with him; the weight of keeping a secret he thought would destroy something he cared about. How I hadn’t recognized it before was beyond me.
But it was good now… mostly.
Part of me suspected that one of the reasons why he’d finally told me was because he didn’t believe what I said about the text. That maybe he hoped by opening up with me that I’d do the same.
I wished that was the case, but my secret would destroy what I cherished most.
Us.
But since it was Valentine’s Day, I refused to think about it. I was having the most perfect day and I wasn’t going to ruin it.
Cam had shown up at my door in the morning with a single red rose and with one after every single one of my classes. By the afternoon, I had half a dozen, which turned into two dozen when he arrived at my apartment that evening. I hadn’t been sure of our plans, so I was relieved to see him in jeans and a sweater and nothing fancy. It was late, after nine, since Valentine’s fell on a Friday, and I wasn’t sure if we were even going out.
Thanking his for the rose, I took them into the kitchen and added them to the vase. He remained by the door. “What are you doing?” I asked.
His grin was mischievous. “Stay right where you are and close your eyes.”
“I have to close my eyes?”
“Yep.”
I arched a brow as I tried to hide my burgeoning excitement. “So it’s a surprise?”
“Of course it is. So close your eyes.”
My lips twitched. “Your surprises are just as scary as your ideas.”
“My ideas andmy surprises are brilliant.”
“Remember when you thought it would be a good idea to—”
“Close your eyes, Avery.”
Grinning, I dutifully closed my eyes. I heard him walk away and then a couple of moments later he reentered my apartment. “Don’t peek.”
Not peeking was like putting a slice of cake in front of me along with a fork and telling me not to eat it. I shifted my weight. “Cam…”
“A couple more seconds,” he said, and I heard something heavy roll inside.
What the? More than curious, it was a struggle to not open my eyes. I honestly had no idea what he was up to and with Cam, anything was possible.
His hand wrapped around mine. “Keep your eyes closed, okay?”
“They’re closed.” I let him lead me out of the kitchen and into my living room.
Cam let go of my hand and slid his arm around me from behind, pressing his cheek against me. Months ago I hated when anyone stood behind me, but I loved it when he did. The feel of his arms, the strength of his embrace, the intimacy behind it.
“You can open your eyes now.” His lips brushed my cheek, sending shivers across my skin. “Or you can stand there with your eyes closed. I like that, too.”
I laughed as I placed my hands above where his rest on my stomach and opened my eyes. My jaw hit the floor. “Oh my God, Cam…”
Before me, sitting on a stand, in a fifty gallon terrariumcompletely decked out with sand and rock bedding, leafy foliage and a hidey-hole, was a tortoise almost the size of my hand.
He chuckled. “You like?”
“Like?” Stunned, I nodded as I pulled free, placing my hands on the glass. The little guy inside pulled his head back. “I… I love it.”
“Good.” He stood beside me. “I thought Raphael could use a play date.”
I laughed again, blinking back tears. “You shouldn’t have done all of this, Cam. This is…too much.”
“It’s not that much and everyone needs a pet turtle.” He bent his head, kissing my cheek. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”
Spinning around, I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him like there was no tomorrow. When I pulled back, his eyes were pools of blue fire. “Thank you.”
He kissed me again, soft and achingly tender. “You’re welcome.”
Sliding my arms to his waist, I leaned against his chest. “Is it a boy or a girl?”
“You know, I really don’t know. Supposedly you can tell by the shape of their shell, but hell if I know.”
I grinned. “Well, boy or girl, I’m going to name him Michelangelo.”
Cam tipped his head back and laughed. “Perfect.”
“We just need two more.”
“So true.”
Wiggling free, smiled up at him. “Be right back.” I rushed into my bedroom and grabbed the card I’d stuck the tickets in. When I got back to the living room, Cam was adjusting the heat lamp on the terrarium. He turned, smiling softly. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” I said, all but shoving the card in his hands. My cheeks flushed. “It’s not as cool as your gift, but I hope you like it.”
“I’m sure I will.” Lips curved up on one said, he carefully opened the envelope and pulled the card out. I hadn’t written much in the card, because I had no idea what to write. I’d settled on a quick message and my name.
I held my breath as he opened the card. The half grin spread into a full smile as he slid the two tickets between his fingers. He peered up through his lashes. “This is an absolutely amazing gift, sweetheart.”
“Really?” I clasped my hands together, pleased. “I hoped you’d like it. I mean, I know not playing soccer sucks and I hope this doesn’t make you sad going to the game and you don’t have to take me—”
Cam claimed my mouth like a man half-starved. There was nothing slow about the kiss; it was a whole different level of seduction. “Of course I’m taking you. The gift is perfect,” he said, nipping at my lower lip in a way that caused heat to sweep over me, leaving me needy. “You’re perfect.”
An insidious voice crept in. If he only knew how far from perfect I really me. I pushed that thought away, letting myself fall into his kiss. That wasn’t hard. Not when he drank from me as if he’d been deprived of the act for far too long.
His hands dropped to my hips and he pulled me to him. Against my belly, I felt his arousal. Cam was a… sexual man, so it came as no surprise he was that hard that quickly, but it always amazed me how badly he did want me but never pushed for what I knew he’d be oh-so down for.
When his grip on my hips tightened, I looped my arms around his neck. We seemed to be on some unconscious agreement, because he lifted me as I wrapped my legs around his waist. I moaned as he pressed against me and his tongue swept across mine.
He started walking, and my blood thundered in my veins. I knew where he was heading and excitement and nervousness warred inside me. He laid me on the bed and I leaned back, down the center. Pausing long enough to tug his sweater off over his head, he then placed his hands on either side of my head. The power and strength in his arms and body was overwhelming but not frightening.
Reaching up, I traced my finger over the flames surrounding the sun on the left side of his chest. “I love this tattoo,” I admitted. “Why did you get it?”
A half-grin appeared. “You really want to know?”
“Yes.”
“It’s pretty lame.”
I followed the sun around his pec. “I’ll be the judge of that.”
“I got it after the fight.” Cam shifted so his knees were against my outer thighs and slid his hands under my shirt. I lifted up, helping him take it off. I have no clue where it ended up. He sort of just tossed it behind him. “I was kind of messed up for a while. Couldn’t go back to school, was stuck in my home, and I’d done that to myself. I was worried that there had been something wrong with me to lose it like I did.”