‘Tell me, when did you buy them?’
De Vèze knows that ‘when’ means ‘who were you with when’ because he wasn’t with her, she is wondering ‘with whom?’ but will not put the question, it would be only too easy for de Vèze to say ‘I was by myself, of course, I don’t even remember where’, obviously, there’s no answer to that, she knows it, this way de Vèze could then take her by the hand and speak of jealousy in a gentle, understanding voice, ‘I also buy my cigarettes by myself, maintain the tender note, and if she doesn’t buy it you could ask ‘do you really have to be jealous? Is it so hard to love someone straightforwardly?’ Leave it at that, don’t get schmaltzy, I don’t do schmaltzy very well, but play up the jealousy angle because all she’s got to go on is the purchase of a pair braces, that’s the way to do it.
She knows all that, which is why she doesn’t ask ‘with whom?’ but ‘when?’ it’s not so provocative, de Vèze replies:
‘I really don’t know.’
The ‘really’ is good, say ‘I don’t know’ by itself and you give the impression that you’re clutching at straws, floundering, in the wrong, whereas ‘really’ is a clincher, it lends your answer an edge of exasperation, most effective, but not with her, she doesn’t give a fig for ‘really’, she moves to what always comes next:
‘You never know anything.’
She clears her throat, cigarette and venom, only moments ago she was saying ‘I never know with you’, and now it’s ‘you never know anything’, it’s not a particularly serious thing to say, ‘you never know anything’, it might just mean something along the lines of ‘I’m feeling upset and want you to know’.
She holds your braces in her left hand, slides them between the thumb and forefinger of her right, the movement uncovers her breasts, a beauty spot high on the right breast, a chocolate chip, ‘You never know anything’, you feel her sadness, she’s not wrong, a person could lie back and settle into sadness like that, life, circumstances, work, you promise you’ll change, that you’ll learn how to know, each of you contributes a quotient of inertia, and then you start all over again, you’re back together for a couple of days, we’ve so little time, at least we shouldn’t quarrel, but after saying ‘you never know’ she added:
‘— ever.’
But there was nothing miserable at all about the way she said ‘You never know anything — ever’. Always a bad sign with her.
De Vèze stands facing the double bed, Muriel shows no intention of getting out of it, well ensconced, shoulders leaning back on the cushions propped up against the wall, now she’s playing with the braces like a catapult, like chest-expanders, she has always liked her hands, small, almost plump, but ‘plump’ is banned, much better say I love to nibble your fingertips, she’s just lobbed ‘ — ever’ at him and is waiting for him to ask for his braces back.
She looks him up and down, from head to toe, not possible to suck in his stomach or else his trousers will end up around his ankles, and if I hold my trousers up I’ll just look stupid, now where’s my other shoe got to, I must go.
A friend of de Vèze once lived for a week in Geneva with a lady chemist, a rich nymphomaniac who kept him under house arrest, she’d go out early in the morning while he was still asleep, she never locked the door, she just shut her pet lynx up in the hall, the lynx wasn’t particularly aggressive but I never wanted to put it to the test, I didn’t try to go out, every morning for a fortnight I read books, I also used the exercise bike, she’d be back at twelve-thirty, off duty until the next day, a whale of a time, absolutely, we’d go out for a breath of air in the afternoon, not for long, she was an expert, she could open your flies using only her toes.
Muriel has certainly chosen her moment, she looks at de Vèze, eyes dewy, eyelashes long, eyebrows arched, then a tetchy mannerism, her hand hooks her hair behind one ear, a little apple, at her best this woman is a little apple, vivacious, elegant, normally a couple of minutes at most would see him, braces, shoes, jacket, peck on the cheek, through the door.
He thought he’d left his braces attached to his trousers, but no, she had unfastened them last night while he was still wearing them, just playing, he’s never sufficiently on his guard, and she has this way, as soon as she’s swallowed the last mouthful of croissant, of kicking her legs out under the bedclothes, but he’s run out of time.
‘What are you thinking? You’ve as good as gone.’
And then a discharge of electricity, shoulders juddering fractiously against the cushions, I’m going to have to go looking for my shoes under the bed on all fours but I’m still in control of the situation, she’s calming down, her face which had looked so hard is softening, she’s forgotten the ‘— ever’, she’s not on the attack any more, soon I can bend down and reclaim my shoe from under the bed, she smiles, not a big smile, so as not to accentuate the quote-mark wrinkles around her mouth and nose, and she says:
‘All right, see you this afternoon.’
Why ever you could not have just replied, ‘Right, I’ll ring you’ when she said ‘All right, see you this afternoon’, why did you have to go into details:
‘No, I can’t this afternoon, some visits to make.’
It didn’t go down well.
‘People to see? Henri, you didn’t say anything about that yesterday, you just talked about the Minister, no, don’t lie, I’m not getting cross, but you didn’t mention it.’
Talking about visits gives her an opportunity to say ‘don’t lie’, it’s not good when she starts saying ‘don’t lie’, too late now to pick up on the jealousy theme, I should have kept the visits to myself and said ‘Right, see you this afternoon, I’ll give you a ring’, and call her around two o’clock and tell her ‘Something’s come up, I’ll phone you back’, saying anything about visits was a mistake, though the visits were nothing special, the head of protocol and the bank, I could tell her that but it wouldn’t help to go into details if what I get is:
‘You prefer the bank to me, that’s very nice, you’re always saying you’re not a money man, you’ve only got a few days in Paris and you prefer the bank to me!’
Best not mention the bank, the head of protocol perhaps, no, don’t mention either bank or protocol, though actually she’s making the running:
‘These visits, which part of town will they take you to? Anywhere near Saint-Germain?’
I should never have mentioned those visits, Saint-Germain is a dangerous part of town.
If she’s already got on to Saint-Germain it means that she is extremely cross, she has lit a cigarette though she’s trying not to smoke before midday, she holds the braces in her left hand as if minded to lash out with them, she says not one word, she has opted for deadly silence now that she’s mentioned Saint-Germain, Saint-Germain is deadly serious, whenever she says the words it’s a point of no return, but if she maintains a deadly silence at least it’s better than if she starts going on about the quartier Saint-Germain, in a deadly silence it’s possible to make a getaway, it’s hard but not disastrous, though it could get really serious if she started on about Saint-Germain, usually it’s a reliable warning sign, when she says Saint-Germain she’s saying ‘Watch out, you’re in for a rough ride!’ and then she waits, and in moments like these de Vèze knows that she’s asking that he be nice to her, that he point her away from Saint-Germain by unlimited attentiveness, promises, pleasant fancies, the prospect of Dinard, she has said Saint-Germain and now she waits for him to redeem himself with tenderness, reassurance and promises.