"You might be surprised what you can do when you've been hurt enough. You might be surprised."
"Have you been hurt enough?"
"Have you?" he countered.
Lucy looked away from him. "Are the others all going to be strangers?"
"What others?"
"The ones who are going to die tomorrow."
Ramp's voice softened. "I don't know them, not personally, if that's what you mean. I know who they are. I picked them because of who they are, but I don't know them. Others will get hurt or die, too. Unintended victims. No matter how careful you are, bombs tend to be a little indiscriminate when they go off around people. I've accepted that risk."
"So what is it then?" She was trying to feed his self-doubt.
Ramp stood up and crossed the distance between them slowly, his body emerging from the shadows the way a lover might approach the bed. He straddled a metal desk chair three feet from her.
"I'm telling you a lot. You tell me something about you. Something personal, private."
Lucy almost laughed. She looked up at the grimy ceiling before staring into his cool eyes. "I already told you I was sleeping with my mother's husband. How much more private you want me to get?"
She could only see half his face. The eyelid that she could see was heavy, and a soft beard had emerged on his chin. She thought she recognized something unexpected in his glare.
She double-checked her impressions and decided to take a chance. Lucy said, "My boobs are two different sizes."
He laughed and pounded a boot on the dirty carpet.
She joined him laughing.
"My mom told me that all girls' boobs are two different sizes. That's not a big deal."
"Mine aren't a little different, they're a lot different. More than a whole cup size different."
"That's a lot?"
"Yeah, that's a lot. It made for some tough times in the locker room at school. And it complicates shopping for lingerie." She said the final word wistfully, hoped it hung in the room like perfume.
He crossed his arms on top of the chair back and sprawled his legs out in front of him, smiling to himself. "Which one do you like more?"
She laughed with him again, trying to draw him along. "What kind of question is that?"
"If you could have them both be the same size, which one would you choose?"
"The left one."
He looked down at her chest and laughed again. "That's a good answer."
His appraisal of her chest left her questioning her decision to flirt with him. She said, "Thank you."
"You know," he said, "when I was like nine or ten, I used to think they had bones in them. Boobs. Breasts. I didn't know they were soft. I thought they had like a cone of little bones holding them in shape. One time I was in a swimming pool playing some game and I accidentally kicked a girl in her chest and her breast just squished underneath my foot. I remember that I thought I'd broken it."
"So how did you find out the truth about boobs?"
"Personal research."
"Seriously."
"My mom. She told me. She'd tell me anything. Never made me feel stupid. Then she died."
Lucy felt the flirtation that was developing between them evaporate like water splashed on a griddle. She knew that the strategic advantage she'd been nurturing evaporated along with the teasing. She said, "I'm so sorry, Jason. About what happened to your mom. It sounds like you two were very close."
He leaned over the edge of the cot and said, "Thanks for saying that. I'm sorry about what happened with you and your mom, too. At least I got a lot of memories with mine. You don't even have that."
"No, I don't even have that."
"Lots of wives and sisters and daughters die because of the stupid way the system works. So this… thing I'm doing, it's really about lots of moms. Everyone has to remember that. It's not just about my mom."
"It's about sons and brothers and fathers, too?"
"Yeah."
Lucy said, "What was she like? Your mom?"
"I don't think I want to talk about her."
"You know, I'm no expert on mothers, that's for sure," Lucy said. "But she sounds very special."
Ramp's jaw took on a tight set. He said, "They won't find you here. In case that's what you're hoping. They might be looking for you, but…" His voice faded away.
"Oh," Lucy said.
"Nobody knows that I'm here. That we're here, in this trailer. Not even Marin knows where I'm planning to spend the night. The truck I'm using won't be missed for a couple of days. My company thinks it's in the shop with transmission trouble."
Lucy fought a fresh flush of despair. She needed to keep him talking. "How did you know her? Marin?"
"We met on the Web. In a chat room."
"Complaining about the justice system?"
"Yeah."
"You recruit her?"
"I guess. Didn't take much effort. It was more like I invited her. She was as angry as I was. You know what happened to her a few years ago?"
"Yes, I do. I didn't work the case but I knew a lot about it. Are you two like boyfriend and girlfriend?"
"At first, kind of. But no. Not now. I don't stay with girls very long. Not that way, anyway. I'm not ready for a real relationship."
Lucy couldn't tell whether she heard some disappointment or longing lurking in his words.
A siren erupted nearby. Its insistent wail filled the trailer like a sour stench. Lucy and Jason both waited to discover whether the sound would approach them or recede into the distance.
It faded.
"Told you. They won't find you here."
"Is she part of what's going to happen tomorrow?"
"You mean Marin?"
Lucy nodded.
"She was going to be. Now she's in the hospital, so I guess not. The whole thing was planned so that we would operate independently. Just in case one of us was caught. Either one of us can make our half of the plan work on our own."
Lucy watched Ramp stand and move to the trailer's window. The thick layer of dust on the glass turned the night sky behind him pasty and sick.
"Were you trying to hurt Marin today? Or was that an accident?"
"You know, I'm not really sure. At the moment I touched the button, I wasn't sure whose side she was on. Mine or her mother's."
"Wow," Lucy said. "You're not even sure whether you were trying to hurt her. What a thing to say."
"Yeah."
Lucy pressed. "The bomb at the district attorney's house in Boulder? That was one of yours?"
"Yes. It was. That was going to be part of Marin's route."
"Route?"
"Tomorrow, we each have a route. There will be a series of bombs. The bombs in Boulder are designed differently from the ones in Denver so that they can't be tied together. And I have something special planned at the end, like a finale at a fireworks show."
"Who's going to die tomorrow?"
The silence that followed her question allowed the hum of I-25 to infiltrate the trailer. An eighteen-wheeler was having trouble with a low gear. The whine of air brakes sounded.
"A lot of people."
"You don't want to tell me who?"
"People who've had a hand in the bullshit. That's all I'll say."
"Regarding your mother? That bullshit?"
"Not just that. Remember, I'm talking about the whole system. I want people to talk about every last place where the system is broken. The problem with Columbine, even with McVeigh in Oklahoma City, was that…"
Ramp's words faded into the darkness as he suddenly refocused his attention out the trailer's window.
"Was what, Jason? What was the problem?"
"Shhh." He waved an open hand from his shoulder to near his waist. "Shhh. Don't speak."
She watched the reflexive movement as his fingers curled toward the switch that was taped to his wrist.
Lucy whispered, "Is there someone here?"
Calmly, he said, "I said shut up. I meant it."
Lucy considered the opportunity that was being presented to her. She wasn't gagged. She could scream and maybe get the attention of whomever Ramp was tracking outside the trailer. At this hour, she assumed it would either be a security patrol or a trespasser.