Met the boss this morning—hardly out of his thirties, crew-cut, wearing a flannel hunting shirt and dirty saddleshoes. I was glad I’d thought to change into my dungarees before the interview.
"Parks," he said, "you can count yourself a very fortunate young man. You’ve come to the most important address in America, not excluding the Pentagon. In the world, probably. To get you oriented, suppose I sketch in some of the background of the place."
That would be most helpful, I said. I wondered, though, if he was as naive as he sounded. Did he think I’d been working in cybernetics labs for going on six years without hearing enough rumors about IFACS to make me dizzy? Especially about the MS end of IFACS?
"Maybe you know," he went on, "that in the days of Oppenheimer and Einstein, this place was called the Institute for Advanced Studies. It was run pretty loosely then—in addition to the mathematicians and physicists, they had all sorts of queer ducks hanging around—poets, Egyptologists, numismatists, medievalists, herbalists, God alone knows what all. By 1955, however, so many cybernetics labs had sprung up around the country that we needed some central coordinating agency, so Washington arranged for us to take over here. Naturally, as soon as we arrived, we eased out the poets and Egyptologists, brought in our own people, and changed the name to the Institute for Advanced Cybernetics Studies. We’ve got some pretty keen projects going now, pret-ty keen."
I said I’d bet, and did he have any idea which project I would fit into?
"Sure thing," he said. "You’re going to take charge of a very important lab. The Pro lab." I guess he saw my puzzled look. "Pro—that’s short for prosthetics, artificial limbs. You know, it’s really a scandal. With our present level of technology, we should have artificial limbs which in many ways are even better than the originals, but actually we’re still making do with modifications of the same primitive, clumsy pegs and hooks they were using a thousand years ago. I’m counting on you to get things hopping in that department. It’s a real challenge."
I said it sure was a challenge, and of course I’d do my level best to meet it. Still, I couldn’t help feeling a bit disappointed. Around cybernetics circles, I hinted, you heard a lot of talk about the hush-hush MS work that was going on at IFACS and it sounded so exciting that, well, a fellow sort of hoped he might get into that end of things.
"Look here, Parks," the boss said. He seemed a little peeved. "Cybernetics is teamwork, and the first rule of any team is that not everybody can be quarterback. Each man has a specific job on our team, one thing he’s best suited for, and what you’re best suited for, obviously, is the Pro lab. We’ve followed your work closely these last few years, and we were quite impressed by the way you handled those photoelectric-cell insects. You pulled off a brilliant engineering stunt, you know, when you induced nervous breakdown in your robot moths and bedbugs, and proved that the oscillations they developed corresponded to those which the human animal develops in intention tremor and Parkinson’s disease. A keen bit of cybernetic thinking, that. Very keen."
It was just luck, I told him modestly.
"Nonsense," the boss insisted. "You’re first and foremost a talented neuro man, and that’s exactly what we need in the Pro department. There, you see, the problem is primarily one of duplicating a nervous mechanism in the metal, of bridging the gap between the neuronic and electronic. So buckle down, and if you hear any more gossip about MS, forget it fast—it’s not a proper subject of conversation for you. The loyalty oath you signed is very specific about the trouble you can get into with loose talk. Remember that."
I said I certainly would, and thanks a whole lot for the advice.
Damn! Everybody knows MS is the thing to get into. It gives you real standing in the field if it gets around that you’re an MS man. I had my heart set on getting into MS.
It never rains, etc.: now it turns out that Len Ellsom’s here, and he’s in MS! Found out about it in a funny way. Two mornings a week, it seems, the staff members get into their skiing and hunting clothes and tramp into the woods to cut logs for their fireplaces. Well, this morning I went with them, and as we were walking along the trail Goldweiser, my assistant, told me the idea behind these expeditions.
"You can’t get away from it," he said. "E=MC2 is in a tree trunk as well as in a uranium atom or a solar system. When you’re hacking away at a particular tree, though, you don’t think much about such intangibles—like any good, untheoretical lumberjack, you’re a lot more concerned with superficialities, such as which way the grain runs, how to avoid the knots, and so on. It’s very restful. So long as a cyberneticist is sawing and chopping, he’s not a sliver of uncontaminated cerebrum contemplating the eternal slippery verities of gravity and electromagnetism; he’s just one more guy trying to slice up one more log. Makes him feel he belongs to the human race again. Einstein, you know, used to get the same results with a violin."
Now, I’ve heard talk like that before, and I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all. It so happens that I feel very strongly on the subject. I think a scientist should like what he’s doing and not want to take refuge in Nature from the Laws of Nature (which is downright illogical, anyhow). I, for one, enjoy cutting logs precisely because, when my saw rasps across a knot, I know that the innermost secret of that knot, as of all matter in the Universe, is E=MC2. It’s my job to know it, and it’s very satisfying to know that I know it and that the general run of people don’t. I was about to put this thought into words, but before I could open my mouth, somebody behind us spoke up.
"Bravo, Goldie," he said. "Let us by all means pretend that we belong to the human race. Make way for the new cyberneticists with their old saws. Cyberneticist, spare that tree!"
I turned around to see who could be making jokes in such bad taste and—as I might have guessed—it was Len Ellsom. He was just as surprised as I was.
"Well," he said, "if it isn’t Ollie Parks! I thought you were out in Cal Tech, building schizophrenic bedbugs."
After M.I.T. I had spent some time out in California doing neuro-cyber research, I explained—but what was he doing here? I’d lost track of him after he’d left Boston; the last I’d heard, he’d been working on the giant robot brain Remington-Rand was developing for the Air Force. I remembered seeing his picture in the paper two or three times while he was working on the brain.
"I was with Remington a couple of years," he told me. "If I do say so myself, we built the Air Force a real humdinger of a brain—in addition to solving the most complex problems in ballistics, it could whistle Dixie and, in moments of stress, produce a sound not unlike a Bronx cheer. Naturally, for my prowess in the electronic simulation of I.Q., I was tapped for the brain department of these hallowed precincts."
"Oh?" I said. "Does that mean you’re in MS?" It wasn’t an easy idea to accept, but I think I was pretty successful in keeping my tone casual.
"Ollie, my boy," he said in an exaggerated stage whisper, putting his finger to his lips, "in the beginning was the word and the word was mum. Leave us avoid the subject of brains in this keen place. We all have a job to do on the team." I suppose that was meant to be a humorous imitation of the boss; Len always did fancy himself quite a clown.
We were separated during the sawing, but he caught up with me on the way back and said, "Let’s get together soon and have a talk, Ollie. It’s been a long time."