StarClan, where are you?
The darkness lifted, and Yellowfang looked around. The Moonstone, the cave, and the other medicine cats had vanished. Instead she was crouching in the clearing where she had first met Silverflame, when she was made a medicine cat apprentice. But now the lush growth of greenleaf had faded; the ground felt marshy underpaw, and a chilly breeze ruffled Yellowfang’s fur.
A few heartbeats later, she spotted Silverflame pushing her way through a clump of fern. “Greetings, Yellowfang,” she began. “It’s wonderful to see you again.”
But in spite of her warm words, Yellowfang could see sadness in her eyes. “Is… is all well with you?” she asked.
Silverflame avoided the question. “I’m very proud of you,” she mewed. “Come, walk with me.”
She turned and brushed through the grass in the direction of the stream. Yellowfang padded at her shoulder, convinced there was something the old cat wasn’t telling her. Silverflame followed the stream until they came to a spot where the current had carved out a wide pool. Silverflame sat on the bank and looked down into the still water.
Yellowfang sat beside her. “Why have you brought me here?”
Silverflame gestured at the surface of the pool with her tail. Yellowfang looked down and saw her own reflection staring back at her, with Silverflame’s reflection beside her. Then she let out a gasp. Behind her, she saw the reflections of three kits, their tiny bodies huddled close together.
Confused, Yellowfang rose to her paws and spun around. No kits were in sight, and the grass wasn’t long enough to hide them. She drew in a sharp breath, but there was no kit scent in the air.
“I saw kits!” she exclaimed to Silverflame. “Where did they go?”
There was a strange, sad knowledge in Silverflame’s eyes, but she didn’t reply. Instead her outline began to fade.
“No!” Yellowfang protested. “Don’t go! I don’t understand!”
Now Silverflame’s body was no more than a shimmer by the poolside. Her voice came faintly to Yellowfang’s ears. “Whatever happens, Yellowfang, know that I am always with you. Trust your instincts. Make your own choice.”
The sunlight was swallowed up by darkness, and Yellowfang opened her eyes to find herself back in the cavern of the Moonstone. The silver light was gone; by the faint starshine Yellowfang could just make out the other medicine cats, all crouched as she was with their noses against the Moonstone. Yellowfang shivered, suddenly overwhelmed by the cold and the blackness. She felt an itch in her paws, an urge to run far, far away, to escape from the questions and the mystery and the responsibility of her new role.
Brambleberry was already awake, arching her back in a long stretch. “That was a lovely dream,” she remarked to Featherwhisker, who was stirring beside her. “I get such great guidance from my StarClan mentor.”
Featherwhisker nodded. “Mine is always quick to point out when I’m about to make a mistake!” he purred.
Yellowfang listened, puzzled. It’s not like that for me. Silverflame told me I have to trust my own instincts.
Then Hawkheart of WindClan sat up. Blinking, he turned to Yellowfang. “How are you feeling?” he asked cheerfully.
“Er… fine,” Yellowfang stammered. Yes, I’m fine, she told herself. I’m a medicine cat of ShadowClan, just as I am destined to be.
The warm sun of leaf-fall shone down, turning the forest to scarlet and gold. Yellowfang and Cloudpelt were collecting cobwebs in a clearing not far from the camp. Yellowfang felt warm affection as she watched the young white warrior pawing the sticky strands from the ivy growing up an oak tree. Though his wound was almost healed, he still moved stiffly, and was only allowed to perform light duties, but he was always the first to offer his help to Yellowfang. She knew his loyalty to her came from the fact that she had saved his life, and she loved him all the more for it.
The bond between us will never be broken.
Yellowfang felt a twinge in her belly and realized that Cloudpelt was stretching too far up the tree in his efforts to reach another cobweb. Gently she nudged him out of the way. “Let me get it,” she meowed. “You need to be careful not to open up that wound again.”
As Cloudpelt stepped back, loud, excited squeals came from the trees at the edge of the clearing. The current apprentices, Nightpaw, Clawpaw, Blackpaw, Flintpaw, and Fernpaw, rushed past and plunged into the undergrowth on the opposite side. They were closely followed by their mentors, Foxheart, Crowtail, Rowanberry, and Scorchwind. Yellowfang suppressed a mrrow of amusement at how flustered all the warriors looked.
“Hey, slow down!” Scorchwind called. “This is a patrol, not a race!”
Cloudpelt rolled his eyes. “Crazy apprentices!”
Yellowfang flicked his ear with her tail. “It’s only three sunrises since you were an apprentice,” she pointed out.
“Ah, but I feel old in my bones,” Cloudpelt responded in a quavering voice like an elder.
A sudden squeal distracted Yellowfang and she looked up to see Blackpaw reappearing from the undergrowth. The white tom was holding a single black forepaw up as he tottered across to her on three legs.
“I stepped on a thorn!”
“Let’s see.” Yellowfang peered at the apprentice’s pads, and finally managed to spot a tiny bramble thorn at the very edge. “Great StarClan, that’s huge!” she mewed, deftly hooking it out with her teeth. She remembered the time she’d bitten Finchflight, pleased that her skills had improved since then. “You’re fine now. Give it a good lick,” she told Blackpaw.
The apprentice swiped his tongue once over his pad, then charged into the undergrowth again. “Thanks, Yellowfang!” he yowled over his shoulder as he disappeared.
Yellowfang realized that Cloudpelt had watched her carefully all the time she was extracting the thorn.
“We’re lucky to have you as our medicine cat,” he meowed. “I’m glad StarClan chose you.”
“It was my choice, too,” Yellowfang responded.
The full moon shed its cold light onto the cats packed into the hollow at Fourtrees. Yellowfang felt the gaze of every single one of them fixed on her as Sagewhisker announced that she was now a full medicine cat.
“Yellowfang! Yellowfang!”
The yowls of welcome rang out around her, mainly from the other medicine cats. Yellowfang’s heart swelled with a mixture of pride and comradeship at the thought that she was one of them, privileged to care for her Clan and to interpret the signs of StarClan for them.
This truly is my destiny!
Then she caught Raggedpelt’s eye. He had not joined in the cheering; instead he was scowling at her. He had hardly spoken to her in the half-moon since she had taken her vows as a medicine cat.
Why can’t he understand, and be glad for me? Yellowfang wondered, shooting him a look that was sharper than flint. If he’s going to be the next ShadowClan leader, I will be his medicine cat, and we will need to lead the Clan side by side. Why can’t he be satisfied with that?
Yet Yellowfang could not stifle a pang of regret for what she had lost. Instead Foxheart clung to Raggedpelt’s side like a burr; she was there now, leaning close to him, whispering into his ear.
It’ll change when he is leader, Yellowfang decided. He’ll just have to accept that this is the way things are.
As Heatherstar began to speak, Yellowfang felt a strange wriggling sensation in her belly. She shifted around among the fallen leaves, trying to get comfortable.