‘You said I was the one who enjoyed manipulating people. Listen to yourself.’
His expression changed abruptly; like he was instantly bored of the conversation. He closed his eyes and stood there, slowly shaking his head. Sinead waited impatiently for him to leave. When he opened his eyes again, he walked back to the doorway.
He turned and looked at her like a teacher disappointed by a disobedient pupil. ‘I see so much potential in you. But how can I help when you refuse to accept what you are?’
She felt her stomach clench. His penetrating gaze disturbed her; it was like he was peering into her soul. He held her look for a moment before he stepped out into the corridor, pulling the door shut. She sat there, staring blankly at the closed door.
Sinead suddenly felt very cold; she zipped up her jacket and pulled the hood over her head. An expression came to mind that her mother often used when spooked: It feels like someone just walked over my grave.
28
The Skype ringtone was playing for the second time as Sinead made it back to her bedroom. She’d been in the bathroom when she heard the first call. That was typical of her dad; they had arranged the call for 21.00 Greenwich Mean Time and now, of course, he was calling twelve minutes early. Sinead got to the bed where the laptop was open, leaned over to the mouse pad and clicked the video answer icon, then lowered the laptop lid so she couldn’t be seen while manoeuvring onto the bed. Her father’s voice came through the laptop speakers.
‘Hello? Sinead – are you there?’
‘I’m here.’ She parked herself on the mattress, pivoted and then, by supporting the cast with her hands, swung her leg up and onto the duvet, out of sight of the camera. She had decided not to mention or reveal her broken leg to avoid a lecture about the many dangers of riding a bicycle in London. She reopened the laptop lid. The screen was black.
Her dad said, ‘There you are. I can see you now.’
A corner window had opened on Sinead’s otherwise dark screen and she saw herself. Sinead said, ‘I can’t see you.’
‘What was that?’
‘I said I can’t see you, Dad. You need to switch on the camera.’
‘I thought I had done.’
‘Press the icon that looks like a camera.’
‘Press the what?’
‘The yellow icon on the screen – the button that has a camera on it.’
‘Just a second…’
Sinead sighed and waited for him to figure out the intricacies of modern video conferencing. Finally, a moving image of her father sitting back down filled the screen. First, she noticed his bushy eyebrows and silvery beard, then, as he settled into his chair and showed his face to camera, she thought he looked older than the last time she had seen him on Skype, sometime last year. There was more grey in his hair and darker circles under his eyes, but still he didn’t look bad for being in his early fifties.
‘There you go, now it looks like we’re in business.’ He scratched his beard and waved. John Woods, the man who had left both Sinead and her mother many years earlier. Somehow she could never bring herself to hate him, though.
Sinead said, ‘I was just in the bathroom. I thought we said nine.’ The plan had been to get settled before the call so there was no chance he would notice her broken leg.
‘We did, but I don’t have long because Freddy’s got a school trip to the museum today and the coach leaves at eight thirty, so we’ll be heading off a little earlier than usual.’
‘Okay.’ Sinead was used to the sudden change of plan.
‘So how are you? What’s the latest?’
‘Yeah, fine. Everything’s good. Busy at work, smashing all my targets. Yeah. What else… Just the usual, going out a lot.’
‘Not every night, I hope.’
‘That’s London for you. There’s always something going on.’
‘I know – I remember what it’s like to be your age. But it’s not a bad idea to give your liver the night off every once in a while.’
Sinead nodded, but said nothing, recognising it was his way of indirectly warning her not to turn into Caitlin.
John said, ‘Are you seeing anyone? Any suitors I need to be keeping an eye on?’
‘No one special.’ Sinead wondered how, if there was anyone special, John thought he could keep an eye on them from eleven thousand miles away.
‘Well it’s about time you found yourself a nice fella. A good-looking, intelligent girl like yourself should’ve been snapped up by now. As long as he’s got a proper job and washes his hair regularly and treats you right, he won’t need to worry about me.’
‘Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Anyway, I’m too young to settle down.’
‘Your mum and I were your age when we had you.’
And look how that turned out. Sinead tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
‘Did you get my birthday card?’
Sinead shook her head. ‘I moved house recently so that’s probably why.’
‘Did you? Right. I don’t remember being told about that.’
‘Yeah, it was no big deal. Just felt like it was time to move on. Try something different.’
‘You’re not getting your post forwarded, then?’
‘No. I need to look into that. The girls were supposed to send stuff on.’
A brief hiatus occurred, both waiting for the other to speak.
John said, ‘Well anyway, I wrote to say we’d like it if you came out to visit us. Come and spend a couple of weeks – longer, if you like. We’ve got a sofa bed in the den so you’ll have a room all to yourself. Anytime this year, we’d all love to see you. Your brothers are dying to meet you. Think about when you’d like to fly and I’ll book you a ticket. It’ll be my birthday present to you.’
‘Okay, yeah, thanks. I don’t know when I can get time off work. Let me have a think about it and I’ll see which dates might work.’
‘Sure. Just let me know a few weeks in advance, so I can move things around. I want us all to have plenty of time together.’
‘Great.’ Sinead nodded. He had made the same offer a couple of years ago, but nothing had ever come of it.
‘Honestly, you’ll love it out here. The outdoor lifestyle – you can’t beat it. We can go kayaking, surfing, rock climbing – whatever you like.’
Sinead thought that just walking on two feet would be more than enough of a physical challenge. But she grinned and said, ‘Sounds cool. Looking forward to it.’
‘So whereabouts have you moved to?’
Sinead instinctively looked towards the bedroom door: Elliot was out, but she didn’t want him coming home and overhearing the conversation. ‘Beckenham. Proper suburbia. It’s nice and quiet. Lots of trees. Apparently, David Bowie used to live in the area before he was famous.’ Sinead knew that would impress her father.
‘If it’s good enough for Bowie, it must be good enough for my daughter. Did I ever tell you I saw him play at–’
‘I know, yeah. You’ve told me that story before.’
John chuckled. ‘I suppose you might have heard that one a few times. So who are you living with?’
‘I’m renting a room in a bungalow. Yeah, it’s a woman from work; she owns the place. She was looking for a lodger and I fancied a change so…’ As well as the broken leg, Sinead wasn’t about to notify her father that the homeowner was a married man. Particularly as she didn’t plan on staying for much longer.
‘Well, that’s good. Make sure you email me the address.’
‘I will do.’
‘I bet your friends will be missing you. You guys were sharing that place for a few years, eh?’