Was it possible Melville was merely naive, as he had told Rathbone, and had been maneuvered into a betrothal he had never intended? Was the marriage really unbearable to him?
Monk stepped off the pavement over the swirling gutter and ran across the cobbled street as a hansom driver came around the corner at a canter and swore at him for getting in the way. The wheels threw an arc of water over his legs, soaking his trousers, and he swore back at the man fluently.
He reached the far side and brushed the excess water and mud off himself. He was filthy.
How would he feel in Melville's place? Suddenly his imagination was vivid! He would no longer have any privacy. He could not do so simple a thing as decorate his room as he wished, have the windows open or closed according to his own whim, eat what and when he liked. And these things were trivial. What about the enormous financial responsibility? And the even greater emotional commitment to spend the rest of his life with one other human being, to put up with her weaknesses, her foibles, her temper or occasional stupidity, to be tender to her needs, her physical illness or emotional wounds and hungers! How could any sane person undertake such a thing?
But then the other person would also promise the same to him. It would be better than passion, stronger than the heat of any moment, more enduring. It would be the deepest of friendships; it would be the kindness which can be trusted, which need not be earned every day, the generosity which shares a triumph and a disaster with equal loyalty, which will listen to a tale of injury or woe as honestly as a good joke. Above all it could be closeness to one who would judge him as he meant to be, not always as he was, and who would tell him the truth, but gently.
He was walking more and more rapidly. He was now in Woburn Place, and the bare trees of Tavistock Square were ahead of him. The sky was clearing again. A brougham swept by, horses stepping out briskly. Two young women walking together laughed loudly and one clasped the other by the arm. A small boy threw a stick for a black-and-white puppy that went racing after it, barking excitedly. "Casper!" the boy shouted, his voice high with delight. "Casper! Fetch!"
Monk turned into Tavistock Square and stopped at number fourteen. Before he could give himself time to reconsider, he pulled the bell.
"Good evening," he said to the parlormaid who answered. "My name is Monk. I should like to call upon Miss Latterly, if she is in and will receive me. That is, if Lieutenant Sheldon will permit?"
The maid looked less surprised than he had expected, then he remembered that Rathbone would have been there only the day before. Somehow that irritated him. He should not have come without a better reason, but it was too late to retreat now without looking ridiculous.
"I shall understand, of course, if she is occupied," he added.
But she was not, and less than ten minutes later she came into the small library where he was waiting. She looked neat and efficient, and a little pale. Her hair was pulled back rather too tightly. It was no doubt practical, and she might have done it in a hurry, but it was less than flattering to her strong, intelligent face and level eyes.
She regarded him with surprise. Obviously she had not expected to see him. He was now acutely aware of being wet and his trousers splashed with filth.
"How are you?" he asked stiffly. "You look tired."
Her face tightened. It was apparently not what she wished to be told.
"I am quite well, thank you. How are you? You look cold."
"I am cold!" he snapped. "It is raining outside. I'm soaked."
She regarded his trousers, biting her lip.
"Yes, I can see that. You would have been better advised to take a hansom. You must have walked some distance."
"I was thinking."
"So I see," she observed. "Perhaps you should have been watching where you were going." A tiny flicker of amusement touched the corner of her mouth.
"You have been nursing too long," he criticized. "It has become a habit with you to tell people what to do for their welfare. It is extremely unattractive. You remind me of one of the more miserable type of governess. Nobody likes to be ordered around, even if the person doing it is correct."
Two spots of color burned on her cheeks. He had hurt her, and he saw it. There were times when her composure bordered on arrogance, and this was one of them. He was aware of having stepped in front of the hansom without looking. He was actually fortunate not to have been run over.
She lifted her eyebrows in sarcasm. "Is that what you waded through the gutter to tell me?"
"No, of course it isn't!" He had not meant to quarrel with her. Why did he allow her to make him feel so defensive? He would not have spoken to any other woman that way. The very familiarity of her face, the curious mixture of vulnerability, bravado and true strength, made him aware of how much she had woven herself into the threads of his life, and it frightened him. She could not leave without tearing it apart, and that knowledge left him open to more hurt than he had armor to deal with. And yet he was driving her out himself.
He breamed in and out slowly, making an effort to control his temper. Even if she could not do that, he could.
"I came because I thought you might be of some assistance in the case I am investigating for Rathbone," he explained. "The trial continues tomorrow, and he is in considerable difficulty."
Her concern was immediate, but who was it for, himself or Rathbone?
"You mean the architect who broke his word? What are you trying to learn?"
"The reason for it, of course," he replied.
She sat down, very straight-backed. He could imagine some governess in her childhood had come and poked the middle of her spine with a sharp ruler. She sat now as if there were a spike behind the padding of the chair.
"I meant what is wrong with him, or wrong with her," she explained patiently, as though he were slow-witted.
"Either," he answered. "He takes precedence, so if there is anything, at least Rathbone can be forewarned-if there is any defense." He sat down on the other chair.
She stared at him solemnly. "What did you learn?"
He was ashamed of his failure. The expectancy in her eyes stung him. She had no idea how difficult it was to acquire the sort of information Rathbone needed. It could take weeks, if it was possible at all. He was seeking the most intimate details of people's lives, things they told no one. It had been a hopeless request in the first place.
"Nothing that is not in the public domain," he replied with an edge to his voice. "I might know if Rathbone had asked me a month ago. I don't know what possessed him to take the case. He has no chance of winning. The girl's reputation is impeccable, her father's even better. He is a man of more than ordinary honor."
"And isn't Melville, apart from this?" she challenged.
"So far as I know, but this is a very large exception," he returned. He looked at her very directly. “I would have expected you to have more sympathy with a young woman publicly jilted by a man she had every reason to suppose loved her."
The color drained from her face, leaving her white to the lips.
He was overtaken with a tide of guilt for his clumsiness. The implication was not at all what he had intended; he had meant only that she was also a young woman. But it was too late to say that now. It would sound false, an artificial apology. He was furious with himself. He must think of something intelligent to say to contradict it, and quickly. But it must not be a retreat.
"I thought you might be able to imagine what she might have done to cause him to react this way," he said. He wanted to tell her not to be so idiotic! Of course he did not think she had been in this position herself. Any man who would jilt her this way was a fool not worthy of second thought, still less of grief, and certainly not worthy of her! If she applied an atom of sense to the matter, she would know what he had meant. And even if he thought it, he would not have said so. It was completely unjust of her even to entertain such an idea of him.