“Yeah!” Gil grinned. “Remember Thegon Ba’Kont? Big guy? Wrestling team?”
“What? He was the adventurer? Really?”
“Of course not! He was their champion! He and Ludmilla got married last month.”
“Oh. Yeah.” Tarvek said, “I sent them a toast rack.”
“We’re there!” called Agatha.
Professor Mezzasalma looked up in pleased surprise as Agatha appeared in the doorway. “Lady Heterodyne! You’re still alive!”
“Indeed I am. How are things here? Has Professor Tiktoffen shown up? We lost track of him.”
Diaz shook his head. “I’m afraid not, Señorita, but that one? The Castle will watch over him.”
Mittlemind nodded. “And my minion has returned from the cistern with the stolen parts for the ‘Lion.’”
Fraulein Snaug sat huddled on the floor clutching a large oilskin bag.
“I kept her safe, and gave her a tour!” the Castle reassured Agatha.
Agatha was not reassured. “Are you all right?” she asked Snaug.
Snaug stared back at Agatha. “Spiky trapdoors,” she whispered. “Torture chambers…man-eating bats…impertinent mechanical squid…” She shuddered.
Mittlemind tousled her hair affectionately. “Oh, there’s some minor psychological damage,” he said cheerfully. “But I always wipe her memory afresh for her birthday!”
Snaug began slowly rocking back and forth. “Happy birthday to meeee…” she crooned softly.
Agatha nodded. “Right.” She strode over to the large hole she had burned into the floor and looked down into the darkness. “I have to get to the bottom of this hole.”
Professor Mittlemind clapped his hands together and rubbed them as he joined her. “Nothing simpler!”
“—And survive.”
Mittlemind paused. “Ah. Tricky.”
The other prisoners peered down into the depths. Diaz raised a finger to the ceiling. “I will strap a series of shaped charges to your chest, and then you will detonate them just before you land!”
Professor Mezzasalma snorted in derision. “Bah! I have a secret procedure of my own devising that will—probably—give you many properties of the noble spider! You can simply leap to the bottom!”
“No, no, my lady,” Mittlemind interrupted. “My hydrophilic attractor could—theoretically—be modified to fill the Castle with water! Assuming your drains have been properly maintained, it will gracefully lower you to the bottom as it subsides!”
The three scientists reared back and regarded one other with rising scorn. Von Zinzer raised a hand and indicated a large industrial winch. “This thing looks like it has enough cable, and it should be strong enough…we could knock together a platform and lower everybody down with some tools and everything. Nice and safe.”
Every Spark in the room glared at him. Then Agatha looked sheepish and cleared her throat. Tarvek and Gil shook themselves. Diaz, Mittlemind and Mezzasalma continued to glower at him.
Von Zinzer wilted under the Sparks’ gaze. “And…and then at the bottom,” he mumbled, “it could unfold into a…a giant caterpillar or something…”
“No, no,” Mittlemind snarled. “You’ve already taken all the joy out of it.”
Agatha rifled all the toolboxes in the room—searching for anything that looked like it might come in handy later. She asked the Castle if it had been able to find Zola.
“No, my Lady. She escaped while I was checking the power, and she is most likely keeping to my dead zones.”
“Well, pay attention, this time,” she told it.
Von Zinzer checked the cable, hooked it up and, soon enough, declared the platform finished.
Violetta threw a switch, and the engine on the winch chugged to life. Von Zinzer climbed aboard the platform and gently moved a sliding switch. With a gentle jerk, the platform rose into the air. Von Zinzer nodded and moved the switch the other way. Nothing happened. He frowned, reset it, and tried again. This time the platform dropped and bounced lightly against the ground. He raised it again and gave Agatha a thumbs-up. “I think we’re good to go.”
“No, no, no! Absolutely not!” Mezzasalma declared. “The controls obviously need work!”
“The gearage looks loose to me!” Mittlemind said.
“I want all the weight-bearing areas double reinforced!” Diaz chimed in.
Agatha blew a lock of hair out her eyes. “We don’t have a lot of time—”
They weren’t listening.
“I need to install an entirely new backup system!”
“Maybe triple! Even quadruple!”
“The linkages—they should be rebuilt!”
Von Zinzer touched Agatha’s arm. “Leave this to me.” He turned to the three scientists. “I’m going, you’re staying here.”
They stared at him.
“Oh, well then,” Mezzasalma shrugged.
“It should be fine,” Mittlemind admitted.
“Let us get started!” Diaz said.
Violetta and Snaug watched with interest. As they helped load the platform, Snaug leaned in. “So. Your boyfriend is really good with dealing with Sparks. Has he served the Lady Heterodyne long?”
Violetta shrugged. “I don’t know.” For some reason, her face was suddenly bright red. “Um…and he’s not my boyfriend.”
Snaug regarded her in surprise. “Oh, reeeeally…” She turned her gaze back at von Zinzer and gnawed gently at her lower lip. She glanced back at Violetta and smiled. “I’m so glad we had this little talk.”
Violetta sat down hard on a box, her eyes slightly crossed.
Agatha handed a box of tools up to von Zinzer. “We’ll make a preliminary trip to make sure it’s safe, then we can bring everyone down.”
Von Zinzer nodded. “Who else is going?” he sighed deeply. “Besides me, of course.”
Gil and Tarvek stepped up. “We’re coming.”
Agatha spun to face them. “You? Don’t be absurd! You’re—” She paused. Aside from their exotic, ever-changing pigmentation, they were both practically glowing with good health.
Agatha’s eye’s narrowed. “You’re looking pretty good, actually.”
Tarvek grinned. “Aren’t we, though?”
“…Suspiciously good.” She bent to examine the device strapped to Tarvek’s chest. Her eye’s widened. “You—what have you done?” She examined Gil’s device. “These settings! You’ve rerouted the entire—” She stared at them, appalled. “You’ve cut your time in half! At least!”
Gil and Tarvek tightened their jaws. “Yes!”
“You need us functioning!”
“We’re not going to stay up here—”
“While you go into possible danger—”
“And do all the work!”
“Even if you can’t cure us—”
“If we all work together—”
“A few hours should be all we need—”
“To get the Castle repaired enough to keep you safe!”
This had all been delivered by Gil, then by Tarvek, back-and-forth at an escalating pace that seemed spoken by one person with two throats. With a jolt Agatha realized that they were now speaking in perfect unison.
“I thought you were dead! After losing you like that once, I’m going to make sure that you’re safe even if it’s the last thing I do!”
They fixed her with identical, challenging stares.
Agatha threw her arms around both their necks and hugged them to her fiercely. “I am going to save you both,” she whispered. They stood together for several heartbeats, and then she tightened her grip.
“And then I am going to kill you!” she shouted.
When they climbed onto the platform, Agatha looked over at the other Sparks. “Actually, it would be helpful if one of you came along.”
Diaz shrugged dramatically. “¡Que mala suerte! I have just remembered that I must see to my knitting! If it escapes, I shall have a devil of a time finding it again. Also, my narcolepsy, it is suddenly returning!” He dropped to the ground.