"Honestly? I don't know, John. I'm trying to figure that out now."
"What if we don't catch Sullivan this time? What if he gets away on us? What if he already has?"
"I think I'll be better about Maria. She's been gone a long time." I stopped, took a breath. "I don't think it was my fault. I couldn't have done anything differently when she was shot."
"Ahh," said Sampson.
"Ahh," I said.
"But you're not completely sure, are you? You're still not convinced."
"Not a hundred percent." Then I laughed. "Maybe if we do catch him tonight. Maybe if I blow his brains out. Then we'll definitely be even."
"That's why we're out here, sugar? To blow his brains out?"
There was a knock against the car's side window, and I went for my gun.
Chapter 102
"WHAT THE HELL IS he doing here?" Sampson asked.
None other than Tony Mullino was standing next to the car – on my side. What the hell was he doing out here in Montauk?
I slowly lowered the window, hoping to find out, to get an answer, maybe a whole bunch of answers.
"I could have been Sully," he said, with his head cocked to one side. "You'd both be dead if I was."
"No, you'd be dead," Sampson said. He gave Mullino a slow smile and showed off his Glock. "I saw you coming up from behind about two minutes ago. So did Alex."
I hadn't, but it was good to know that Sampson still had my back, that somebody did, because maybe I was starting to lose my focus a little – and that could get you shot. Or worse.
Mullino was rubbing his hands together. "Cold as shit out here tonight." He waited, then repeated himself. "I said it's fricking frigid, freezing cold out here."
"Hop in," I told him. "C'mon inside."
"You promise not to shoot us in the back?" Sampson said.
Mullino raised both hands and looked either puzzled or alarmed. Sometimes it was hard to tell with him. "I don't even carry a weapon, fellas. Never did in my life."
"Maybe you ought to, the friends you keep," Sampson said. "Something to think about, brother."
"Okay, brother," said Mullino, with a mean little laugh that made me rethink who he was.
He opened the car door and slid down into the backseat. The question was still on the table: Why had he shown up here and what did he want?
"He's not coming?" I said, once he'd shut the rear door on the cold. "Is that right?"
"Nah, he's not coming," said Mullino. "Never was."
"You warn him?" I asked. I was watching Mullino in the rearview mirror. His eyes narrowed and showed extreme nervousness, something uncomfortable, something not right.
"I didn't have to warn him. Sully's self-reliant, takes care of himself just fine." His voice was low, almost a whisper.
"I'll bet," I said.
"So what happened, Anthony?" asked Sampson. "Where's your boy now? Why are you here?"
Mullino's voice sounded like it was coming from underwater. I didn't quite catch what he said this time.
Neither did Sampson. "You have to speak up," he turned around and said. " You hear me? See how it works? You have to get your voice up to a certain volume."
"He killed John Maggione tonight," said Mullino. "Kidnapped him, then carved him up. That has been a long time coming."
There was complete silence in the car. I doubt there was anything he could have said that would have surprised me more. I'd felt earlier that maybe we'd been set up, and we had been.
"How did you hear about it?" I finally asked.
"I live in the neighborhood. Brooklyn's like being in a small town sometimes. Always been that way. Besides, Sully called me when it was done. He wanted to share."
Sampson shifted all the way around to face him. "So Sullivan's not coming here to collect his family. Isn't he afraid for them?"
I was still watching Tony Mullino in the rearview. I thought maybe I knew what he was going to say next.
"This isn't his family," he said. "He doesn't even know who they are."
"Who's in the house then?"
"I don't know who they are. Central casting. A family that might look like Sully's."
"You work for him?" I asked Mullino.
"No. But he's been a good friend. I was the one afraid of getting my face messed up in school, not him. Sully always protected me. So I helped him. I'd do it again. Hell, I helped him kill his crazy old man."
"Why'd you come out here?" I asked him next.
"That one's easy. He told me to."
"Why?" I asked.
"You'll have to ask him. Maybe because he likes to take a bow after a job well done. He does that, y'know. Takes a bow. You don't want to see it."
"I already have," I told him.
Mullino opened the back door of the car, nodded his head to us, and then he was gone into the night.
And so, I knew, was the Butcher.
Chapter 103
WHAT'S THAT OLD LINE, new line, whatever it is – life is what happens when you're busy making other plans?
I went back to Washington that night because I wanted to see the kids, and because of Nana Mama, and because I had patients who depended on me and were scheduled for the next day Nana has always preached that it's important for me to be helping people; she's calls it my curse. She's probably right.
I could clearly see Michael Sullivan's face, his little bow, and it killed me that he was still out there somewhere. According to the FBI, the mob had already put a million-dollar price tag on his head, and another million on his family. I still had a suspicion that he might be an FBI or police informant, and that one or the other was helping to protect him, but I didn't know that for sure, and maybe I never would.
On one of the nights after Sullivan escaped, a school night for the kids, I sat out on the sunporch and played rock and roll on the piano for Jannie and Damon. I played until it was almost ten. Then I talked to the kids about their mother. It was time.
Chapter 104
I'M NOT SURE why I needed to tell them about Maria now, but I wanted the kids to have some more of the truth about her. Maybe I wanted them to have the closure that I couldn't get myself. I had never lied about Maria to the kids, but I had held back, and… no, I had lied about one thing. I'd told Damon and Jannie that I wasn't with Maria when she was shot, but that I got to St. Anthony's before she died, and we'd had a few last words. The reason was that I didn't want to have to tell them details that I could never get out of my own head: the sound of the gunshots that felled Maria; the sharp intake of her breath the instant she was hit; the way she slid from my arms to the sidewalk. Then the unforgettable sight of blood pouring from Maria's chest, and my realization that the wounds were fatal. I still could remember it with nightmare clarity more than ten years later.
"I've been thinking about your mom lately," I said that night on the porch. "I've been thinking about her a lot. You guys probably know that already."
The kids were gathered around close, suspecting this wasn't one of our usual talks. "She was a special person in so many ways. So many ways, Damon and Jannie. Her eyes were alive and always honest. She was a listener. And that's usually a sign of a good person. I think it is anyway. She loved to smile and to make other people smile if she possibly could. She used to say, 'Here's a cup of sadness, and here's a cup of joy, which do you choose?' She almost always chose the cup of joy."