A sad commentary on my profession: while I hope to God that everything goes smoothly, and the only things Harper and I cover are the end of the year and then each other, I really wouldn’t be heartbroken to get a nice piece out of the chaos either. I can’t help but chuckle to myself, now how warped does that sound?
Hope for the best. Expect the worst. And be there to get it on film when it happens.
As I take my seat at the desk Kyle provided for us, I glance over at Harper who is once again attached to her cell phone, ranting at poor Jims about something. She is totally amazing to watch. She can get things done using the cell phone that would put Kissinger to shame.
"Jims, you’re a bright kid, regardless of what you do to your hair. You’ll find a way."
I watch her take that deep breath and hold it, before she lets it out slowly. Oh, he’s arguing with her. Dumb, Jimmy, just plain dumb, and you know it. I hope she keeps it down to a roar when she lets loose.
"Just do it!" She slams the cell shut. I think it’s her third one since she came to the station. They keep meeting an untimely demise at her hand.
I have discovered I do admire and love the way she works. She simply takes charge and gets things done. No questions, no arguments. Do it, and do it to her satisfaction, and you’ll be just fine. Do it wrong, and you will find yourself a permanent name on her list for a very long time. She has a long list and an even longer memory from what I can gather.
I’m absolutely sure that’s one of the reasons I fell in love with her.
Wow. Who’d have ever thought this day would come? I am in love with Harper Lee Kingsley. And I’m not insane. Well, at least, I don’t think so. Of course, I don’t think most insane people realize they’re bonkers, but I digress.
I came to this definite conclusion at the bottom of our shower this morning. And now all I have to do is find the guts to tell her. I think. I mean, I guess she deserves to know. It’s just I don’t want her to panic. She told me she does that if she thinks about these things too much. But, Hell’s bells, I simply need to find a way without scaring her off.
I wonder what that would be. Because I can’t imagine one. This is a woman who has spent her entire life going from woman to woman. I’ve had five lovers in my life, she had five lovers last week. Well, not last week, but probably the week before Thanksgiving that was true. The fact that she hasn’t left me already is amazing in and of itself.
To talk about being in love … I don’t know.
She growls a little, crossing her arms and staring down at me, her cue that I haven’t been paying attention. Oops, that’s bad too. Focus, Kels, you have to make sure there is a later so you can tell her.
"Sorry," I offer with a weak smile. "You were saying?"
"No, I was asking." She settles down across from me, sitting backward in her chair like Kyle did. Much sexier look on her.
Stop it, Kels! Damn!
"Yes?" I lean back, playing with a pencil, rolling it between my fingers.
"If you wanted to spread anthrax, how would you do it?"
Kyle answers, arriving on the scene, taking a seat on the corner of the desk. "It’s best spread through the air, but you two probably already know that. Just thought I’d let you know that our teams have had two sightings of the nutty professor."
"And?" I watch as she perks up immediately. She loves a hot story.
"He seems to be sightseeing. He’s been spending a lot of time at the Museum of Natural History, appropriately enough. He hasn’t made one furtive movement. Not yet, at least."
"Well, he’s got a few days." I lean forward resting my elbows on the desk tapping the pencil. "Maybe he’s trying to figure out the best way to deploy it."
"Makes sense."
She reaches out and takes my toy, laying it down next to me. I forgot she hates it when I do that. Nervous tic I picked up in college. I have a right to be nervous. I have a lot of reasons to be nervous. "Too damn bad the city is on high alert. I’d love it if you could snag him and bring him in for questioning," she tells the agent without so much as a look in my direction.
"Me too," Donovan agrees with a nod. "But, under the circumstances, until he does something to give us a reason there really isn’t anything we can do. Hell, every interview room I have here is already full." He sighs, a very frustrated sigh. "I know the NYPD is having the same problem. And, from what I hear, Rikers is already so full they’re trying to figure out what they’re gonna be doing with everyone else they arrest this week."
"Terrific. No place to put the bad little boys and girls." Harper shakes her head.
"Right."
"What about from an airplane or a blimp?" I offer, trying to get the conversation back on track with a little brainstorming, before my thoughts can deteriorate with that ‘bad little girls’ comment. I’d hate to start thinking about handcuffs and …
Argh! Stop it, Kels.
"Restricted airspace," both Harper and Kyle offer at the same time, in the same bored tone. Smart asses.
"But what about those helicopter ride places in the city? How do they get around?"
Kyle shrugs. "Can’t hurt. We’ll show his picture at those places. Have them contact us if he tries to hire them."
"Ventilation systems?"
"Covered." Kyle shrugs and picks up my pencil. "Well, ladies, since there is no rest for the wicked, or the FBI, I need to get back to work. I’ll keep you posted. If you come up with anything, let me know."
"No problem," Harper agrees. "I think it’s gonna be a long couple days."
"It annoys me, that’s all," I say, sipping from the soda glass.
She nods, swallowing, before attempting to answer. "I know, but…" Her comment is cut short by the ringing of her cell phone.
I simply take another bite of my sandwich and wait, hoping its good news. The last few days have been frustrating as hell for us. Nothing like waiting for the end of the world.
"Kingsley." It’s not Kyle, I can tell by the look on her face. "Well, of course, there would be contract issues in Los Angeles that would have to be cleared up." She grins at me and lifts her eyebrows.
Oh boy, somebody is making her a better offer.
Oh shit.
They’re gonna offer her a fabulous job here in New York and she’s gonna take it. And if I tell her how I feel then, it’s gonna sound manipulative, like I’m trying to get her to stay with me. And if I don’t, she’ll leave and not know what this meant to me.
Why is my stomach dropping? I should be happy for her. She’s damn good at what she does. She deserves all the best. She should come to New York. She should be in the number one market.
Okay, Kels, buck up. Be a professional about this. You’re happy for her. You want her to have all the best. You’ve let go before. You can do it again and you can survive it again.
Remember how much it hurt the last time?
No. Don’t think like that. That was a long time ago, you’re stronger now, used to being alone. This is Harper. She deserves it, too. Just be ready to go on without her.
I try to choke down a little more of my food and not look as sick to my stomach as I feel.
She makes a few more comments then quietly snaps the cell shut. Well, that’s a first. I guess offering her a lot of money, power and prestige make her a happy camper and kind to electronics. She gives me a great big Cheshire Cat smile.
"Well, don’t you look pleased with yourself?" I hope I sound happy for her. I am happy for her. I just hate the crushing feeling in my own chest. A Mack truck didn’t park on top of me by any chance, did it?
"I am, thanks. It’s an incredible package, Kels. A major step forward. Of course, a few details need to be tweaked, but, otherwise, it’s golden."
I reach out and pat her hand, trying to keep mine from shaking. "Congratulations."