I blushed, the warm sensation of flush covering my cheeks was an obvious sign. It was suddenly getting ridiculously hot in here.
“Thanks, I, I um” why was I so nervous? I must have sounded like a babbling baboon. Just talk like a normal adult human being, I felt myself screaming in my head.
“Are you avoiding me Evie?” His head tilted to the side awaiting my response.
“No, I, I am just a little embarrassed about yesterday.” And our mating dance we just performed in front of all of my friends, while I am ENGAGED.
“Don’t be, you okay though? You seemed pretty upset.”
I raised my left hand to tuck the loose stray of hair behind my ear.
“So you’re engaged then?” His face tensing as he bit the words out. He was glaring at the ring on my finger.
“Yes, as of yesterday.” I tried to offer a genuine smile but I couldn’t. His eyes focused back on mine like he was trying to see my most intimate thoughts and feelings. It was completely un-nerving.
“You don’t seem overly happy about it, is that why you were crying yesterday?”
“Look you know nothing about me, don’t try and assume you do or question my relationship.” I snapped at him. I stepped to turn away and I felt a hand around my upper arm.
He pulled me towards him. “I am sorry, I didn’t mean to pry. You are just far too perfect to be upset over a man.”
This was too much, I needed air. My chest was constricting my breath. “I have to go”. I pulled my arm from his grasp and started walking towards the exit. I kept focus on the red illuminated exit sign directing me to the stairs. I tried to squeeze through the crowds but I was being pushed and pulled. I lost my footing and the next body to barge me knocked me off of my feet.
I felt myself being scoped up into two strong arms. The alluring scent of him confirmed that these were Connor’s arms. I buried my head into his chest. He smelt amazing, primal. I opened my eyes when I felt the cool fresh air over my body. I looked into Connor’s eyes and could feel my soul aching for him. His eyes were wide burning into mine.
“Thank you, you really don’t need to be so kind to me,” I said softly.
“What if I want to?” He whispered gently.
“I really should go.”
He set me down onto my feet. I turned on my heels and started to walk, quite unevenly I might add. I had only taken a few steps when I heard footsteps pacing behind me. I glanced over my shoulder to see that Connor was following me.
“What are you doing?” I exclaimed.
“Making sure you get home safely. I can’t have you walking by yourself in central London, it’s not safe”.
“Honestly I will be fine, I am walking to the end of Piccadilly and will pick up a cab from there.”
“Let me drive you home?”
I sniggered. Not the most attractive sound to make in this instance, but it was automatic to his ridiculous proposal.
“Surely if you are worried about my safety and well being then it would be very irresponsible of me to get into a car with a strange man and let him drive me home, alone”.
“Good point Evie, I’ll just in the cab with you then we will have a chaperone”.
My mouth dropped open. He couldn’t be serious, could he?
“Can you take me to Oakfield Drive, Chelsea please?”
“No problem Ma’am, jump on in”
“Look Connor, it was very kind of to walk me here but you really don’t have to escort me home, see you around.”
He stood in front of the open back door to the cab not allowing me to get inside, “I thought we had already established that I will be talking you home and this lovely gentleman will be our chaperone”.
He climbed into the cab and put out his hand for me to take. I don’t know what possessed me to do so but I slipped my hand into his and climbed in.
“Well that was hardly gentlemanly; shouldn’t you let the woman get in first?”
“For one I was not giving you the chance of getting in before me to drive off. Secondly” he lowered his voice to an almost whisper “I don’t think my heart could take the strain of you bending over in front of me in that dress.” My mouth dropped open, I was completely silenced. Not letting go of my hand we began our journey back to my home.
My mind was wandering. Trying to piece together the evening’s events and pin point the moment which was the catalyst for me ending up in the back of a black cab, hand in hand with Connor Ryan.
“You’re quiet.” His eyes were looking at me intently awaiting an answer.
“Just a long night I suppose, I’m not a great drinker.”
His mouth widened showcasing his bright white, orthopaedics dream smile. A flutter of emotions stirred in my stomach. My body confirming the lustful reaction I felt towards him.
His fingers began to entwine with mine. With his free hand he played with my engagement ring, frowning at each movement it made under his touch. He seemed deep in thought, contemplating the gravity of what this ring symbolised to me.
Chapter 6
“Thank you for the drive sir, how much will that be?” Connor called over to the driver.
“Twenty six pounds Sir.”
He pulled out his black leather wallet and handed thirty pounds over to the cab driver, “keep the change sir, the drive has been worth every penny.”
I stood there, my mouth ajar, again, at what had just happened. Connor looked over and winked.
“Thank you for escorting me home Connor, it was very kind of you. Will you be ok getting home?”
“Not a problem Evie, and yes I will be fine getting home.”
“Where are you going?” I found myself asking, not wanting our chance meeting to end.
“Clapham Common”
“Why didn’t you stay in the cab?”
“I’m gonna walk, think I need some time to think before I am hounded by Travie and the band.”
I giggled, “You can crash in the spare bedroom if you want?” I was reacting on impulse nothing less. What the hell was wrong with me? My head tried to reason but I would not listen, something about him being here with me just felt right. All common sense quarantined behind closed doors pushed to the back of my mind.
“Will your fiancé not mind?” He asked.
“He is away on business, again, so no he won’t mind.”
Not pressing me on my comment he simply said “That would be great”.
I pushed the key into the lock and turned it. I pushed the door open and threw down my keys onto the side table, kicking off my heels. Ahh, that felt amazing.
“I’ll show you up.”
I walked cautiously up our staircase acutely aware that Connor was walking behind me. I tried to walk as seamlessly as possible without overtly looking like I was wiggling my ass and giving him the green light. When we reached the top of the staircase I walked to the spare bedroom and opened the door. One of the five ‘spare’ bedrooms. Out of them all this was the most comfortable, with its own en-suite. It was also the one furthest away from my bedroom. As I had already been acting on impulse this evening, the more distance my body could have away from Connor’s the better.
“Let me know if you need anything”, I smiled and turned to walk out of the room.
“Good night Evie”, he called as I pulled the door to.
I was woken by the sound of my own screams. Sweat was pouring from every crevice of my body. My eyes were swollen and I couldn’t stop the tears from spilling onto my pillow case. My heart raced. Panic erupted. I looked around the room trying to focus. As I realised my whereabouts I began to calm enough to realise it had been a dream, a bad dream. They used to be a Nightly ritual until I met Henry. The last time I had one was four weeks ago. It was the last time Henry hit me.