"Hmmmmm," Snape's tone remained skeptical, but he didn't press the issue. "Well, he's gone now, so I wouldn't worry about it." He turned to go, then gestured impatiently to the boy. "Come along. You can clean up the frog toes you made me spill, and then I think some ingredient preparation will keep your mind off deranged house elves."
Harry huffed as if greatly put upon, but since he didn't really mind spending time with his guardian in the lab, he obediently followed the tall man, and the ensuing tasks quickly distracted him from the odd house elf's visit.
Despite his outward calm, Snape was less dismissive of the event. A peculiarly acting house elf could hardly be good news. He determined to keep his eyes open for any unexplained phenomena in the new term.
"Da," Harry spoke up unexpectedly as the two were busy grinding dried yew berries. "Are the Weasleys, y'know, normal?"
Snape bit back his instinctive, insulting response and glanced down at the boy. Where was this coming from? "What do you mean by 'normal'?" he temporized
Harry frowned down at his mortar and pestle, as if he found the grinding very difficult. It had been really interesting to spend time with the Weasleys, though it had made him think a lot about the Dursleys and how different they were. Harry didn't think it was just the difference between Muggle and Wizarding families either. Padfoot and Moony were great fun, but time with them was more like time with friends. The only rules really came from his da, and Harry rather suspected that Padfoot would have been all too willing to break a few if Moony hadn't given him a Look every time he started to hint at it.
But the Weasleys had been a real family, with rules and punishments and presents and stuff, and it had indelibly brought home to Harry that not all families behaved as the Dursleys did. While Snape had told him over and over that his relatives were repulsive creatures, Harry hadn't really understood just how differently his upbringing had been from Ron's until he spent the holidays with the Weasleys.
"Harry?" Snape prompted, a frown appearing at the boy's silence.
"Erm, Auntie Molly told you that we sorta got into trouble, yeah?" Harry asked, appearing to change the subject.
"If you are referring to the incinceration of the Weasleys' Christmas tree, yes, I heard about it. Or was there some other event that you'd like to share with me?"
Harry glanced quickly up at his da and was relieved to see the man's eyebrow was quirked at him sardonically. Good. That meant he wasn't mad. "No," he assured him hastily. "That was it. Uh, did Auntie Molly tell you that the twins started it? An' that they were the ones who incendio'd the tree and cut the sofa in half?"
Snape blinked. "They cut the sofa in half?"
"Well, yeah, but Bill fixed that pretty quickly, so I don't think Auntie Molly even noticed," Harry admitted.
"I was aware that the twins were held primarily responsible for the event," Snape nodded, deciding it was better to ignore the sofa issue entirely.
Harry went back to grinding the berries. "When it all happened, an' Auntie Molly first came into the room, d'you know what she said?"
"The mind boggles," Snape replied drily.
Harry looked up at him. "She said, 'Who did this?'" He waited, as if he had just said something momentous.
Snape scowled. He didn't like the feeling that there was something he was missing. "And what about that surprises you?" he demanded. "The lack of profanity?"
Harry shook his head impatiently. "No. She asked. Don't you see? She didn't automatically think it was me!"
Ah. Snape realized anew what life at the Dursleys must have been like for Harry. "I see."
Harry nodded. "An' when the twins told her it was mostly their fault, d'you know what she did then?"
Snape considered his answer carefully. He now had an idea where Harry was headed with this. "I understand they were punishedтАж physically."
Harry looked at him soberly. "She whacked them on their bums with a wooden spoon. Pretty hard too."
"You are aware that will never happen to you?" Snape asked quickly. Had the punishment frightened the boy?
"Yeah," Harry nodded. "ButтАж"
"What?"
"Auntie Molly didn't hit them as hard or as long as Uncle Vernon used to hit me. An' I never burned down the Christmas tree or did anything as bad as that."
Snape suppressed a sigh and laid down his tools. "That is because your Muggle relatives were inhumane and uncaring. Molly Weasley's punishment of the twins, while undoubtedly unpleasant for them to experience and perhaps a bit frightening for you to witness, was nevertheless infinitely more appropriate than how those Muggles treated you."
Harry kept his eyes on the yew berries he was crushing to a powder. "My uncle тАУ and my aunt тАУ used to hit me really hard," he said quietly. "Even when I was a lot younger. It really hurt."
"I know," Snape said softly, watching the boy. What in Merlin's name was he supposed to do or say?
"They said I deserved it."
"And that was a lie!" Snape spat. His rage overtook him and he swooped down on the small boy beside him, tilting his chin up so he could see his eyes. "You did nothing to deserve such treatment. Nothing you could have done would have merited the treatment you received at their hands."
Harry blinked back tears. "It wasn't just that they hit me. I mean, they didn't do it that often, but even when I was being good, I still had to do all the chores an' stuff, while Dudley didn't do anything. An' if I did get in trouble, I didn't get fed an' I got extra chores an' the Dursleys were mad for like forever. But at the Burrow, after the twins got whacked, they just came back to be with the rest of us. They weren't locked in a cupboard. They didn't even have to clean more of the living room than anyone else. An' they got dinner that night, an' pudding even. So did the rest of us, an' we were being punished too. But even when we got sent to bed early, we still got hugged an' kissed good night, an' we were allowed to get out of bed to use the loo if we needed to, an' no one had to do more chores than anyone elseтАж" Harry broke off, the tears spilling over. "Why did my relatives hate me so much?" he wailed. "I really tried to be good, I did!"
Snape cursed under his breath even as he found his arms full of weeping, snotty little boy. Dear Wizarding Parent Monthly, he mentally penned, Why is it that children insist on taking responsibility for things which are wholly beyond their control, such as the depraved indifference of their caregivers, yet are wholly incapable of being responsible for such simple tasks as cleaning their teeth or picking up after themselves?
He spelled the lab stool into a more comfortable chair and settled the child on his lap. Merlin, if Albus or Minerva happened upon this scene, he'd never hear the end of it! Once the boy's tears had finally slowed, he poked the brat to get his attention. When the wet, green eyes met his own, he asked, "Harry, what do you think would happen if I had gone to your house and cast a glamour on you and your cousin, making each of you look like the other?"
Harry blinked in confusion. "Huh?"
"What would have happened? Would your aunt and uncle have accepted their son's behavior if it was done by someone with your face? Would they have been pleased with their son's apparently turning over a new leaf and leaving his bratty ways behind when you тАУ wearing your cousin's visage тАУ continued cooking and cleaning?"
"N-no. They probably would have killed Dudley when he acted his normal way an' they would've tried to get me to stop doing chores." Bewildered, Harry gazed at his da. Why was he asking such a silly question?