“Because I did something stupid … again.”
“No, I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about this.” He gestured at the ritual he’d started. “Why do we bother, Nick? Really? Ameretat’s right. In the end, you will destroy everything anyway. All we’re doing is delaying the inevitable. Why not stop our suffering now and just get it over with? Let the dark powers take it all.”
Nick was aghast at the mere suggestion. Yes, Caleb was hurting, but you didn’t throw everything away over a painful past. You didn’t just quit a fight because you got a bloody nose. No matter how bad it stung, you shook your head, got your bearings, and fired back with another punch.
Surely, Caleb of all beings understood that.
“Because this is bigger than just us, Cay. I saw that when I died. This isn’t about you and me or even Xevikan. This is about billions and billions of lives. If I don’t stop myself from becoming the Ambrose, it’s not just this world that will end. It’s all of them. Everything unravels. Everything. And you’re right. It’s hard to get up every day when you know you’re going to be slapped back down. Hard to make yourself go face the people who hate and mock you. It’s hard to find dignity in a world that hates you and begrudges you every breath you take. But you know why we do it?”
“We’re stupid?”
“No,” Nick breathed. “We do it for those tiny moments when the world opens up and we’re no longer alone. Those moments when we realize that we aren’t the center of the universe, but to one single person, we’re their entire existence. We are what they live for and we matter to them more than anything. No matter how hard we get knocked down, we stand back up, and we face the darkness that’s inside us and we raise our fist at it and tell it, not today. You won’t have me yet. I won’t let you take that last bit of my soul.”
Caleb shook his head in denial and turned away.
But Nick wouldn’t let him. He pulled his arm until their gazes locked. “You still care, Caleb. In spite of everything you’ve been through. I’ve seen it. I know it. You’re wounded and you’re hurt. We all are. But we’ve made our own screwed-up family of misfits out of the chaos that is our life. You. Me. Kody. Menyara. Simi. Acheron. Bubba. Mark. Kyrian. My mom. We have bled, inside and out, for each other. And yes, all of us will die eventually, but that isn’t what matters. What matters is how we live in the interim. We don’t fight for ourselves. We fight for who and what we love. And if there’s any chance to save them, we have to take it. Because they deserve nothing less than our absolute best, and by all the gods of all the universes that’s what I plan to give to you and the others. My absolute best. Always.”
For several seconds, Caleb said nothing as the thunder rolled around them. Finally, he glared at Nick. “I really effing hate you, Gautier.”
Nick grinned at him. “Yeah, me, too.”
Grabbing his hand, Caleb yanked him into a bro-hug. “We will get Kody back, Nick. I swear it.”
“I’m going to hold you to that.” Nick clapped him on his shoulder then stepped away. He gestured at the mess Caleb had made. “So have we completely ruined this? Do we have to start again?”
Caleb shook his head. “It’s done. You just need to stand in the center and assume the rest of your powers.”
Nick arched his brows. “All of them?”
He nodded. “And try not to set the world on fire. Definitely don’t make my head explode.”
“Great way to build up my confidence, brother.”
“I have faith in you.”
Coming from Caleb, that said a lot.
Nick took a deep breath and walked to the center, where Caleb had used the oils to draw the Malachai emblem in the rain. He raised his fist high in the air as lightning lit the sky above them. “By the power of Grayskull … I have the power!”
Caleb groaned. “By the power of Grayskull, I’m going to cleave your skull from your shoulders if you don’t take this seriously.”
Lowering his arm, Nick snorted. “Dude, you’ve seen my screwed-up life. I take everything seriously.” He winked at the demon, then used his powers to transform from human to his Malachai form.
Nick stared down at his marbled black and red skin. He would never get used to seeing that. “Tell me I’m better-looking as a demon than you are.”
Caleb rolled his eyes. “You’re not my type, Gautier. I think you’re uglier than a three-toed warthog, and Mark after a four-day swamp zombie hunt.”
“Ah, man. Now that’s just plain mean.”
Caleb shoved at his shoulder. “Get on with it before I get hit by lightning.”
Sobering, Nick cleared his throat before he spoke the words he needed to seal off the rest of the ušumgallu. “Ahira, ahira, esh’in ay. El ee, el loh door … duh … d…” Crap, he’d forgotten already.
“Dor ey uh.”
He inclined his head to Caleb. “Dor ey uh. Dash ee Malachai tirre tirre el lan de um.” Honestly, he had no idea what he’d just said, but no sooner had he spoken the last syllable than the storm began to recede. The rain slowed.
“It’s working?” he asked Caleb.
“It’s working.”
Relieved that he hadn’t had to attack Xev or Livia, or anyone else, Nick returned to his human form. “Man, I’m so glad I didn’t have to bleed this time. It’s a miracle.”
“Actually…” Caleb pulled the hem of Nick’s T-shirt up to expose the scar on his chest where Ameretat had stabbed him. “You did bleed. Most of it’s still on the floor of my house, I’m sure.”
Nick fingered the scar that formed an intricate pattern that eerily reminded him of Noir’s and Azura’s symbols. “This isn’t the trunk monkey, is it?”
Caleb laughed. “No. It’s not. It’s a memento from your enemies.”
“Yeah, well, at least it makes my heart surgery scar look cooler.”
“Speaking of, how do you feel?”
Nick took a minute to consider it. Honestly, it was hard to put into words what he felt now. “Stronger. More powerful … like a target.”
“You are all of those.”
Great. Just what he wanted.
But he was done complaining about it. All the bitching did was make Caleb crankier than normal.
“So do you think the other Nick made it back home?”
Caleb picked up the remnants of his oils and packed them away. “You would know before I would.”
Nick started to ask him how, but before he could, he knew the answer. Somehow. “Yeah, he did.” He frowned at Caleb. “How do I know that?”
“You’re the Malachai,” he said simply.
The universal target for everything nonhuman in existence. A walking trophy that all preternatural creatures would kill to defeat, slay, or enslave.
Up until now, that had terrified him. Yet as Caleb handed him the basket of oils to carry while they headed back to his house, Nick realized that it wasn’t so bad.
Yeah, okay, it really was. It sucked. It blew. It was a destiny he wouldn’t wish on anyone.
But this was his life, and honestly …
He liked it. It wasn’t perfect, yet it was all his.
And while it was true that he’d had no choice in how he’d entered this world, and he would most likely have no choice in how he left it, he did control the in-between years.
As his father had said, the Ambrose Malachai would never be forgotten. But it was up to Nick, alone, as to how he’d be remembered.
And from this moment forward, he intended to make every single day count. Most of all, he intended to minimize any future regret.
EPILOGUE
“All right, Xev,” Nick said, just outside the locked door. “Brace yourself. There’s no telling what we’re about to walk into. It could be bloody bloody.”